How far apart?

fairytalewed · August 2014

Just curious for STM/+ how far apart are your children? Did you plan it that way? If they are close together--any complications? Even though baby is only 2 months old, I been thinking about IF I have another baby when is a good time.

fairytalewed · August 2014

Thanks ladies! My cousin is due mid September and her baby boy turned one this past week...so about 14 months apart (crazy)! My doctor said I should wait 11-12 months to try, but even then I'm not sure if I'd be ready. This little man seems to be enough to handle!

amroke · August 2014

Mine are 19 months apart. They are close in age because i had my first at 36 and didn't want to wait too long for another due to my age.

fairytalewed · August 2014

I'm sorry you had a rough delivery and wish you a better experience for the next one! I'm 28 and I feel like I have time also, but at the same time I feel like an old lady.

jenb_99 · August 2014

DS and DD are 2.5 years apart, exactly the way we planned it. Both c-sections with ridiculously easy recoveries.

ksyknelvr73 · August 2014

My boys are 3 yrs and 3 mos apart. I had hoped for them to be closer in age but I had a couple miscarriages, so it didn't work out that way, but I am really happy with the difference. We want to have a third, so I am really torn on the spacing for that...at least 2 years is what I am hoping for.

Lild09 · August 2014

I had a c section and was told not to start trying til 18 months post partum to allow full healing...some studies suggest 12 months but most say 18 after a c section...regardless if you do wait til 18 months to get pregnsnf, you'll deliver your next one just over 2 years from the first (27 m old)

Bootsie327 · August 2014

Provided I feel healthy and ready to go, we will probably start trying for #2 shortly after LO turns 1, so that they are hopefully about 2 years apart. We want 3, and since I'm 31, we want to just bang 'em out fairly quickly.

Junebug060609 · August 2014

27 months.

We didn't intend the gap to be so big. We were ntnp starting at 4m pp since I was 35. Got a bfp days after DSs 1st bday...but that pg ended in a m/c. We were TTCAL for a while before I got pg with dd...joys of old age, apparently.

ns1 · August 2014

We started trying for #2 when DD was 2. They're petty much 2 years and 9 months apart

I like that they'll be close but DD is a little more independent. It's a mad house most days, but it's good!

hbird0723 · August 2014

I was just asking my sister-in-law about this. Mostly I said is it bad that I'm not sure I want another one? Don't get me wrong I love my little girl but she's a handful and I just can't imagine having other kids on top of it. I guess you get used to it but we are at least waiting a year!

ksyknelvr73 · August 2014

Kimbus22 said:
Ours are 33 months apart. We sort of planned it that way. We started trying when my son turned 2 but we thought it would take a while since it took a year to get pregnant with him. I was aiming for almost 4 years apart and instead we got almost 3 years apart.

So far so good but 3 year olds are assholes so I'm not sure how I'll feel 6 months from now. We're not having any more kids so no more age gap planning.

@Kimbus22‌ I just laughed out loud...3 year olds are assholes. Truer words have never been spoken.

sparklingdiamond · August 2014

We will probably start trying after he turns one. I would like them to be about two years apart, but it took two years just to get pg with my son :-/

jenniferroshto · August 2014

My first two are 14 months apart, unplanned. It was super hard at first but now that they're older I love it. They are really close. They are 8 & 7 now. They are pretty well independent so it allows me to be able to enjoy the time with this LO but I wish it wasn't quite that big of a gap. Our original plan was two years apart, just didnt happen that way

gutsysneakers · August 2014

Hbird05 said:
I was just asking my sister-in-law about this. Mostly I said is it bad that I'm not sure I want another one? Don't get me wrong I love my little girl but she's a handful and I just can't imagine having other kids on top of it. I guess you get used to it but we are at least waiting a year!

This.

sarag0116 · August 2014

3 years 3 months. We waited on purpose. I wanted to enjoy DD on her own for a while. We also considered things like how long they would both be in daycare together as well. I don't think we will have any others but if we so I wouldn't wait as long.

letal316 · August 2014

My OB suggested to wait 9 months before trying for a second. We want 4 kids and I'm 30 so I have to keep that in mind. We'll likely start trying again in March/April 2015. My plan was always to have two close together and then wait a few years and then have two close together again. We'll see what happens!

bossyferg · August 2014

27 months apart but i wanted a bit closer and DH wanted to wait longer but I said no more birth control for me and he didnt use condoms... Guess he didnt mind that much!

busterbeagle · August 2014

We started trying when DD was 13m. She was 18m when I got my BFP. Breastfeeding made me ovulate very infrequently, even for a couple months after weaning. They are 26 months apart and the age difference has been really, really hard, but a huge part of that is probably that DD has never been an easy baby/kid. And that is why we are most likely done. If I could guarantee the third would be like DS, I would consider it, but knowing I could get another DD...nope nope nope. Although I also swore we were one and done until she was about 10m old so I guess time can change your mind or make you forget.

runningyogimama · August 2014

13 months apart, planned, but it happened the first month of trying, so a little surprising. I had 2 easy deliveries and recoveries, but DD2 is much high maintenance and not as good of a sleeper and pregnancy was a bitch with a needy baby the second go around. I wouldn't do it again, even if they are auper close later on.

haylo33 · August 2014

I really have no clue when I want to try for a second. DH said not until our son is out of diapers which makes sense. Plus there is money to think about. 2 kids in daycare would be expensive. I imagine we will start trying when he is 2. That way they would almost be 3 years a part

Sam0905 · August 2014

I had a c-section and would like to try for a vbac so my MW said we have to wait at least a year. But I also had pre-e so I'm nervous about developing complications again. Strangely enough, my MW said that the closer my pregnancies are, the less likely I'll become pre-eclamptic again. With all that being said though, we'll probably wait at least 2 or 3 years. I loved being pregnant (despite my complications) and I love this newborn stage but I want to get to know my baby for a few years. I also think it'd be smarter (financially, emotionally, physically) to wait a bit.

Bayberry12 · August 2014

I'm 35, so one of my first questions at my pp appointment was when can I try again. I had a high risk pregnancy and complicated c-section, so my dr recommends a year. I started crying. It took me two years to have my first, which I lost and another two years to have my second. So who knows how long it could take to have another. We are ntnp right now, but I think we will really start trying when this lo is about 9 months.

yepyepsms · August 2014

Almost two years apart exactly. June 2012 and May 2014:) we planned it that way. We are approaching our mid 30s and knew we wanted two or three kids so we wanted to keep going just because of our age and if we had troubles getting pregnant. So far we love their age difference. No issues really just busy busy busy:) we are pretty sure we are done now though.

I didn't have any complications and was actually able to have a successful vbac!! The only thing that was hard was being pregnant and taking care of an almost two yr old. Especially at the end of the pregnancy.

pistolpackinmomma · August 2014

16 months. Totally planned and so far we love it. My OB told me to wait 6 months before TTC and we did.

krlovell · August 2014

jenb_99 said:
DS and DD are 2.5 years apart, exactly the way we planned it. Both c-sections with ridiculously easy recoveries.

This exactly... Even the same genders!!

momthatlifts · August 2014

Lissiehoya said:

What is ntnp?

not trying not preventing

I was just talking to my mom about this. I think it would be nice if I could wait 5 years or so. But I would also feel pretty bad if she was an only child for 5 years and then suddenly not being able to give her that kind of attention. Plus I would like for them to all be out of the house round the same time. (even though I was in and out from around 19 until I met dh)

CamrynnsMommy · August 2014

Approximately 4 years between them all. I wanted a few years between them to have time to enjoy them without being overwhelmed.

frasey · August 2014

DD is 2.5, and DS is 3 mo. We actually started TTCing about a year before I got pg, so we wanted them closer. That said, Im glad DD is as old as she is now, as she's a lot more independent, etc.

purtz · August 2014

Ours are 3 years apart, because it took me awhile to convince DH to have another and then almost a year to get pregnant. I thought 3 years would be perfect, being able to talk and bring potty trained. However, the terrible threes are terrible!! And I wish they were more like 2 years apart...

chillypenguin · August 2014

My girls are 19.5 months apart, we planned it for them to be close. We started trying when DD1 was 8 months old, I got my BFP on her 1st birthday. So far I love it. It's hard at times, we have just been having some struggles with DD1, but she totally loves her sister and I love seeing them so close already. We are planning on having a third, but I am not sure on the timeline. If DD2 stays mellow and DD1 isn't too much of a handful, we might try to have DD2 and baby #3 about 2-3 years apart.

rcbuko · August 2014

I just had my fourth. The first two are exactly 27 months apart. The second and third are 26 months and 1 day apart. The third and fourth are 18 1/2 months apart. So far, I think I prefer the 2 year gap over the year and a half gap between kids. My third baby is still very much a baby at 21 months old now and it is often hard juggling him and my 2 month old. My oldest two were more independent at just over two years old and I was able to focus more on the newborn. We have never had jealousy issues whenever we brought a new baby home so I don't think the age gap necessarily dictates whether jealousy will happen or not. I do love seeing my son with his new baby sister and I like it that they will seemingly be buddies but he also has a good relationship with his older sisters. I think it will be easier as the two youngest get older but at this stage it is definitely more difficult.

Mikki62 · August 2014

Mine are just over 2 years apart. I wanted them closer together but had a late miscarriage in between. That baby would have been 14 months apart from DD. I was far enough along that my Dr wanted me to wait 6 months to try again so I could heal. I got pregnant 7 months after.

fairytalewed · August 2014

@ kc83 this is how I feel exactly! From 10 days old my baby has had colic and screamed all day, every day! He is finally calming down, but still fussy most of the day. My husband at this point in time said no more and I told him not all babies are the same, but at the same time I'm scared baby #2 will be the same and I don't know if I could handle that with another. I have always dreamed of having 2-3 kids and I have been around so many babies growing up; so I figured it would be fine. I have never seen a baby act like mine nor been so needy. Still weighing my options...but very happy to hear everyone's story!

gypsymystic · August 2014

My LOs are 4 years and a few months apart. I got pregnant with DS2 just after DS1's 4th birthday. We planned on having them at least 4-5 years apart, however, DS2 was an unexpected surprise. I am very glad it happened that way though. Props to those with toddlers and a newborn but I personally would find that extremely challenging. FWIW, my 2nd sister and I are 4 years and 11 months apart, and my other 2 sisters are each 2 years and some change apart and they were always very close, whereas I had never been close to any of my sibs until I was pretty much out of my teen years. I am the oldest, but I always felt like the black sheep in my family because it is hard for me to relate to my siblings due to the age gap, I guess. H is the youngest in his family, and his oldest sibling, my BIL is 11 years older then the middle sibling, my SIL, then SIL and H are 3 years apart and they have always been close. My BIL and his siblings are distant.

gypsymystic · August 2014

sparklingdiamond said:

We will probably start trying after he turns one. I would like them to be about two years apart, but it took two years just to get pg with my son :-/

It took us 18 months to get pregnant with DS1, since MH had cancer when he was in his late teens and had radiation treatment. Doctors told him it would be difficult to have children, and to wait 5 years for the radiation to clear. I was 23 and he was 24 when we finally conceived our son, but we started trying when I was 21, knowing it would take awhile. I figured it would be that way with DS2, so we had planned to start trying sometime after DS1 turned 4 and we were being 'cautious' but also NTNP, so basically withdrawal method... $:\$ ">

well H got a little carried away in August, just after DS1 turned 4 and in just one cycle and one oops, I got pregnant with DS2. I was told by many people including my OB that once you have one baby, your body knows what it is doing and it is usually much easier to conceive.

ho11yday · August 2014

DS1 and DS2 are 2 years and 3 months apart, which was exactly what I wanted. Next time, we will try for 3 years apart and, if DH allows, the fourth will be 2 years from the third. So 2-3-2 year gaps.

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