not gaining enough

thatgirlnicki · July 2014

So I've been struggling with my 10 wk old for awhile. She does not like to eat. She nurses quickly and infrequently. She has reflux and is on prevacid. Ive also been on the mspi diet for a month. She has only gained 3 oz a week for the last two weeks and will refuse to eat often. Im at a loss for what to do. Can't get into GI doc for three weeks. Im not sure if shell do better by bottle but we are thinking to try to pump and bottle feed during the day. Possibly feed her in her sleep. Its going to suck but I can't let her not eat enough. LC made me feel crappy bc I don't co sleep and I could be missing feeding cues. Cosleeping just won't work for me and now I feel even more to blame. Im going to stop swaddling and feed more at night. So ill be super sleep deprived too. My mom says just give it up and feed her formula. I put so much into this and feel so sad about giving up even though im pretty sure my baby doesnt like nursing anyway. Oh and I go back to work in a week. Sorry so long. Im just lost and sad. Im sure nobody has an answer but I thought I'd see what others thought

[Deleted User] · July 2014

Don't feel guilty about the co-sleeping. It does not work for everyone. If LC thinks you're missing feeding cues, try observing her while she's sleeping during the day (when you'd be awake anyway). Do you see her rooting or suckling in her sleep? I'm guessing that's what the LC is getting at.

How long has she been on prevacid? Maybe she's still having some reflux issues which make it uncomfortable to eat? (in which case I would think there wouldn't be a difference between BF and FF). I don't have any experience with reflux but maybe some other mamas can chime in.

Hugs mama you are doing you're best. Try not to stress about work yet - one thing at a time.

thatgirlnicki · July 2014

She really shows no feeding cues anymore. I feel like she never wants to eat or maybe I just offer so often that she doesn't get a chance to show them.

thatgirlnicki · July 2014

I would love for her to feed every 2 hours but she cries and refuses. I was trying to feed her while sleeping in the day but I was exhausting and stressing both of us. I am going to try to feed more at night but I am such a mess now I can only imagine how ill be with less sleep. I know pumping isn't ideal but I am just not sure what to do. I might end up switching to formula anyway. This LC is big into co sleeping. She just put out a book on it. I have done weighed feeds and she took about 3 oz each time.. but she often only nurses 7x per day.

thatgirlnicki · July 2014

Thanks. She is not my normal LC but mine is on vacation. I just wonder if I should throw in the towel soon. I am supposed to meet with my LC next week about going back to work but now im not sure. I have invested so much of my time, energy and money into this and i keep facing more and more challenges.

thatgirlnicki · July 2014

I agree. Im just desperate and hoping she'll take the bottle better than she nurses. It might sound silly but it feels like she's rejecting me when she refuses to nurse.

[Deleted User] · July 2014

thatgirlnicki said:

I agree. Im just desperate and hoping she'll take the bottle better than she nurses. It might sound silly but it feels like she's rejecting me when she refuses to nurse.

That doesn't sound silly at all. BFing and just being a new mom is an emotional experience. That desire to feed our LOs is so strong - it's basically our most important job! Have you tried giving her a bottle of BM yet? 10 weeks seems old enough to try.

jenn43 · July 2014

thatgirlnicki said:

I agree. Im just desperate and hoping she'll take the bottle better than she nurses. It might sound silly but it feels like she's rejecting me when she refuses to nurse.

That is totally normal. My LO would fuss and cry sometimes and refuse to nurse, and I felt completely rejected. We put so much pressure on ourselves. As hard as it is, try to cut yourself some slack. Whatever works for you and your baby is the right thing to do.

thatgirlnicki · July 2014

She has had the occasional bottle. She eats only a little bit but my husband feels we can get more in her bt giving her that instead of the pacifier. She won't comfort nurse. Im actually the mom of a 2 yr old too who I had to stop nursing at 6 weeks.

eggmankate · July 2014

I don't have any sound answers, but just wondering if you've at all considered or pursued the idea that LO has some sort of pain from feeding? I know you mentioned reflux, but could something else be going on concurrently? I know sometimes ear infections can make eating painful. Or maybe there is tongue tie?

[Deleted User] · July 2014

I know you've seen the pedi recently, but if she's not improving maybe you should try to get in again soon. I second looking for a tongue tie or lip tie - sometimes these are not always obvious. I agree if she's not eating very long at the bottle either then switching to formula isn't going to help. Your milk is much better for her.

[Deleted User] · July 2014

thatgirlnicki said:

She has had the occasional bottle. She eats only a little bit but my husband feels we can get more in her bt giving her that instead of the pacifier. She won't comfort nurse. Im actually the mom of a 2 yr old too who I had to stop nursing at 6 weeks.

Also, why did you have to stop nursing your first LO?

thatgirlnicki · July 2014

Thank you all for your responses. We saw both the pediatrician and GI today. He has recommended elecare on the likelihood that she has discomfort from some allergy. She has already had a tongue and lip tie corrected. I know that this goes against what many of you think you would do but please dont judge another mother until you've walked in her shoes. I can't get her to eat either nursing or bottle but I hope the formula will allow her to heal enough to want to eat againn. I really gave this my every effort and im spent. I stopped nursing my son because he could never latch properly and I suffered 6 weeks of excruciating pain. He also had a tongue tie corrected.

[Deleted User] · August 2014

I don't think anyone here will judge you. You have obviously been trying your hardest to make BF work and do what's best for your LO. If others offer advice to try to continue BF please don't take that as judgement. I think you will have access here to lots of advice about how to maintain your supply while trying out the formula, so you can return to BF if you want to.

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