Hi, I am 18 weeks pregnant and I am starting to freak out because I have an unusually extreme fear/aversion of breast feeding. Its not just the thought of baby feeding, Its the thought of milk coming out my breasts....period. It makes my stomach churn. I want to breast feed because I am aware of the benefits but I don't know if I can get over this. I see people posting about fear of breast feeding but I can't find anyone who's fear is as extreme as mine or has to do with the mere thought of milk coming out. Even pumping sceves me out. I seriously think I might throw up if I try. It really upsets me that I am like this and nobody understands. Please don't tell me that breast feeding is a beautiful thing (i know), that its ridiculous to be scared or grossed out (I know), that its the best thing for me and my baby (i know). I am aware of all of these things but it doesn't change the visceral reaction I have to the thought of it. Has anyone else felt like this? Were you able to get over it?
Re: Aversion to breastfeeding
I didn't have the exact same feelings but I did have an aversion to it. For me it was about being the "only one" or feeling confined because of it. I spoke with my OB about my feelings and she assured me that whatever decision I made for my baby would be the right one. And that breastfeeding is best for some, but not for others. Our pediatrician agreed.
I never fully got over my feelings so I decided to combo feed and that has worked out well for our family. Maybe you could try that? The first days, weeks and months with your new baby is precious time. You don't want to waste a minute of it being uncomfortable or unhappy. Do what's right for you - don't worry what other people say and think.