Parenting

Harness Question

1. If you think that connecting a potentially fleeing toddler to your body via some type of restraint is a leash and only meant for dogs, no need to respond.

2. If you think that I am a horrible parent and should only utilize straps to connect my child to a chair with wheels, also no need to respond.

Onto the question. I have the monkey backpack (aka judgment monkey) for my 2 yo, he likes it, but I do not. If he does decide to bolt my options are to 1. try and grab/convince my 3 yo to run and catch DS or 2. stand my ground and potentially have him reach the end of the lead and fall back on his butt (haven't had this happen yet but it is a fear).

I was looking at a wrist tether like this: https://www.amazon.com/Baby-Buddy-Toddler-Tether-Navy/dp/B0018MJTV0/ref=pd_sbs_ba_1?ie=UTF8&refRID=0XYQAHDZM7K96DCG5K82 I was thinking that if he did decide to bolt and reached the end it would wind up pulling his arm similar to if he tried to run away while holding my hand. These don't seem to be popular anymore, so am I missing something? Are the harness ones popular because of the cute character and slightly less stigma as a leash? Or are they safer? I do realize that having it on his wrist would make it easier for him to get off, but he can undo his backpack so I figure it is about the same in that aspect. So what am I missing about the wrist type?

Oh and I tried telling him to listen. It worked on my first, but failed with the second kid. I have to resort to this because I am a lazy parent.

DD Nov 2010 ~ DS June 2012

Re: Harness Question

  • I use the monkey backpack every time I go out on my own with both children. It is great, he has occasionally tried to run off and been pulled backwards, but he is very stable on his feet and only fell backwards the first time landing on his bum. I really wouldn't worry about that, they learn early.

    As for the hand tether, I tried one before I got the backpack and DS1 hates it, he had a full out tantrum in the middle of the car park, whereas he loves his backpack, so I never use the tether.

    Also, I use it constantly (often attached to my stroller) and have never had any judgement from anyone...well, out loud anyway ;). Most people think it is very cute and he also has a dinosaur one that always gets cute comments, and people keep telling me they think it's a great idea and wish they had them when their kids where young etc.

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    Diagnosed with Anti little c antibodies. DS1 7.11.11 - Anaemia and Jaundice. 10 days in the NICU, 1 exchange transfusion and 4 blood transfusions. DS2 29.8.13 - Anaemia 7 days in the NICU and 1 exchange transfusion. Both are now happy and healthy. 

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  • Why would your 3 year old have to chase him? You are the parent.

    2 year olds can't get up enough speed and the leash isn't elastic enough to snap them back that hard. Only way that would happen is if you pulled back when he reached the end.

    I need my 3 year old to come with me while chasing 2 year old so she isn't left by herself.

    I haven't really tested the physics with the backpack. I did have him fall on his own while I was holding the other end. I felt bad, even though it had nothing to do with backpack.

    DD Nov 2010 ~ DS June 2012
  • Hmm well that is a decent thought @MarlaSinger&. I'm ok with the harness judgment, I'm not completely sure I'm ready for the judgment that will ensue if it looks like I'm dropping my kid on his ass though.
    DD Nov 2010 ~ DS June 2012
  • Welcome to parenting where as long as you aren't neglecting or abusing your kid we most likely give no fucks about your parenting choices. 
    We save most of our judgements for non-parenting issues...like carts.
    God help you if you don't return your cart or judge what someone has in theirs. That is serious business.

    We have a lot of cart related feels, huh?  

  • Maybe you could even teach him to heel?
    You're bringing me back to my favourite week ever as a preschool teacher, when all the kids wanted to be puppies going to obedience school. I was SO DOWN.
    DS just wants to lick me when he plays puppy dog.
  • My brother had one of the wrist ones when he was a kid. I remember it, and it did him no harm. I've actually been tethered to him. I do think the backpack ones do put the force on the entire body, instead of just pulling on the wrist or arm, which might pull it out of socket.
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  • I am glad that no one is aware of massive injuries caused by the wrist one. I may get one because it is easy to stick in a bag, just in case that F you look comes out of my little one at an inopportune time.
    DD Nov 2010 ~ DS June 2012
  • I would think the wrist one would be more annoying to the kid. He may forget that the backpack is attached to a leash but he would be more aware of his wrist being tethered.
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  • We used the judgement monkey on occasion when DS1 was 15-20 months. I used to get him to help me hold the monkey's tail and that would stop him from pulling too hard on the leash.
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