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February 2013 Moms
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New Daycare provider started today :( UPDATE: PIP

draeraydraeray member
edited July 2014 in February 2013 Moms

My MIL has been the person watching DS since I went back to work at 3 months. While it hasn't been perfect and she doesn't do things the way I would and sometimes drives me bat shit crazy, DS loves her and she loves him and he is very well taken care of. My MIL went to stay with her other son and his two kids in Arizona  and left this weekend and she won' t be back for a year. She is helping him out because him and his wife are both Air Force and the wife got deployed in Qatar for a year. I know it's a blessing that she has helped us this long and also a blessing for my bro-in-law because she is able to leave everything here to help him too, but man, I didn't think I would take it this hard!

The new girl showed up today. She lives behind my house and she is willing to watch him AT my house which is a plus. She has a 4 month old baby and she is super capable of taking care of my boy but I just worry. I worry that he he will lose his shit and she can't calm him down and then her telling me she just can't handle it and I am left without anyone. I worry that DS is wondering where his grandma is and why this strange lady is in our house. I worry that he won't get the same level of care that he did when grandma was there. I worry about the whole thing!

I know he will make it and adjust, but this Mama is super worked up over this! Let the countdown begin to when his grandma can come back at watch him.

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Re: New Daycare provider started today :( UPDATE: PIP

  • wifeofadamwifeofadam member
    Switching care providers is always hard!  Hang in there.  Your LO will do fine  :)
        
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  • DannysmamaDannysmama member
    As PPs said, transitions are hard, but give it some time.  It took me waaaaayyy too long to get to a comfortable place with our nanny and now she and I have great synergy.  By no means an expert, but the most valuable lesson I learned is that there are multiple right ways to do things - and everyone has good days and bad days at work.  There may be a red line wrong way for you, but your new DCP will learn from you and you'll learn from her.  Give her and yourself time.  Don't stress that he'll lose his sh*t and she won't be able to deal.  Chances are, he'll be better behaved for her than you (or even your MIL) ... lord knows my son is!  Just the other day, DS was pushing it and tried to scratch me, and our nanny gently corrected him and he was SO upset that he got in trouble with her.  With me, he'd do it again!  

    On the quality of care ... people may disagree with me on this, but my aunt worked her whole life and had nannies and she said she would do unannounced drop ins, or come home at various times.  It's a good thing she did, since she caught a nanny drinking during the day, but trust on both sides takes time to build.  

    Hang in there, and good luck!
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  • Gftf7Gftf7 member
    No advice, but I am right with you on the mama worry part. I stress a lot about all these things that might happen (but don't). If only that part of the brain could be shut off. Hugs to you.
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  • lc&jwlc&jw member

    I can totally understand your worry about this. We have a nanny who watches DD & DS in our home while I'm at work. We've had to transition to a new provider several times since they've been born and I always get very anxious about it. It's so hard to think about LO being upset and not being there to soothe them.

    My kids have always adjusted though, although with some nannies it took longer than others. If I was ever particularly worried about it, sometimes it helped to have the nanny text me an update about how they were doing. I also have always encouraged our nannies to let us know in the beginning if the kids were upset so we can help them brainstorm about strategies for how to soothe them.

    From the picture, it looks like your DS was having fun. Is that your older DS in the picture as well? Could he help give you a report about how things are going?


    TTC since June 2009
    BFP #1 2/22/10 M/C 6w2d
    BFP #2 October 2010 CP
    BFP #3 1/11/11 M/C 8w5d
    IUI #1 Aug 2011= BFN
    IUI #2= BFP #4 9/18/11 missed M/C, D&C 10/18/11
    IUIs #3&4 = BFN
    IVF #1 May 2012 = BFP! Twins!!

    Fraternal twins born Feb. 2013

     Lilypie - (X78c)
     


     

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