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Parenting
lifesaverz
member
I need all the wisdom you have (long)
lifesaverz
member
in Parenting
Ok, so I know I don't come over here a ton, but I respect your advice & I'm hoping maybe someone can offer some wisdom or thoughts for me regarding my current situation.
So I'm a therapist, have been working in the field for over 5 years & I passed my licensure tests just before my LO was born - she is now almost 8 months. Anyway now that I've kind of "arrived" in my field as far as having no more requirements to complete, it has always been my goal to work part time, whether through an organization or by doing a private practice. I've discovered, however, that there aren't really any part time positions out there - every place seems to want full time. Well I recently applied for a job that was originally willing to consider part time, & I had 2 interviews that went very well, but then they called last Wednesday & said after assessing their needs they are preferring full time, so if I couldn't do that I may not get it. I was super bummed because I had really fallen in love with the company from what I'd learned about them.
So anyway, other info is that DH is SO unhappy at his job right now. He works full time in the food industry, & although he had enjoyed his job for the last 7ish years, recently this has completely changed because they got a new store manager that is just really awful, & I kid you not this guy has driven away SO many employees. I lost count but I think at least 20 left just because of him, & many had worked the same position as my DH so now he is left with a lot of the burden on his own. He has been finishing up his bachelors these last few years & is currently in his last year of school to get his teaching credential. In 6 months he has to take time off to do student teaching, some of which he has vacation for, & some of which will be unpaid.
I'm currently staying home taking care of LO, & I'm on unemployment because my job was funded by a government grant that ended a couple months ago, which is why I've been looking for work.
Damn this is so long, I'm sorry. Anyway, the past couple days we've been discussing me possibly calling the place I interviewed back & telling them I could do full time, & having DH quit his job. I am SO torn up about this. On the one hand it makes the most logical sense - DH would stay home with LO & continue to do his school, it would be good for my career, I would make just as much money by myself as we are combined right now. I would only have to do it for a year before he could get a job teaching.
My other option is I had thought about trying to do private practice right now since I couldn't find other work. I have a place where I can do it but I feel like starting is hard & so unpredictable. My unemployment is supposed to end by the end of this year, & I'm scared that I might not be making enough in private practice yet to account for that loss. This decision seems like the smartest, & initially I was actually really excited about it, but my mama heart is just breaking at the idea of not being with LO. I worked full time from when she was 3-6 months & it was hard. I just feel like I will miss her so much & that a year is so long. Plus though she'll mostly be with DH, she would have to be in daycare a few days a week in 6 months when he does his student teaching. Ugh, I probably sound like an ass because I'm sure many of you have to leave your babies to work full time for much longer than a year. I wish I didn't feel this way & the decision was easier. Part if me is like ugh I never intended to be full time, I had always planned to be home with my baby more, but the other part of me is like well it's just a year. If this is making sense at all & if anyone actually read all this, any thoughts/words of wisdom for me? I have to decide by tomorrow morning so I can call the company to see if it's still a possibility.
So I'm a therapist, have been working in the field for over 5 years & I passed my licensure tests just before my LO was born - she is now almost 8 months. Anyway now that I've kind of "arrived" in my field as far as having no more requirements to complete, it has always been my goal to work part time, whether through an organization or by doing a private practice. I've discovered, however, that there aren't really any part time positions out there - every place seems to want full time. Well I recently applied for a job that was originally willing to consider part time, & I had 2 interviews that went very well, but then they called last Wednesday & said after assessing their needs they are preferring full time, so if I couldn't do that I may not get it. I was super bummed because I had really fallen in love with the company from what I'd learned about them.
So anyway, other info is that DH is SO unhappy at his job right now. He works full time in the food industry, & although he had enjoyed his job for the last 7ish years, recently this has completely changed because they got a new store manager that is just really awful, & I kid you not this guy has driven away SO many employees. I lost count but I think at least 20 left just because of him, & many had worked the same position as my DH so now he is left with a lot of the burden on his own. He has been finishing up his bachelors these last few years & is currently in his last year of school to get his teaching credential. In 6 months he has to take time off to do student teaching, some of which he has vacation for, & some of which will be unpaid.
I'm currently staying home taking care of LO, & I'm on unemployment because my job was funded by a government grant that ended a couple months ago, which is why I've been looking for work.
Damn this is so long, I'm sorry. Anyway, the past couple days we've been discussing me possibly calling the place I interviewed back & telling them I could do full time, & having DH quit his job. I am SO torn up about this. On the one hand it makes the most logical sense - DH would stay home with LO & continue to do his school, it would be good for my career, I would make just as much money by myself as we are combined right now. I would only have to do it for a year before he could get a job teaching.
My other option is I had thought about trying to do private practice right now since I couldn't find other work. I have a place where I can do it but I feel like starting is hard & so unpredictable. My unemployment is supposed to end by the end of this year, & I'm scared that I might not be making enough in private practice yet to account for that loss. This decision seems like the smartest, & initially I was actually really excited about it, but my mama heart is just breaking at the idea of not being with LO. I worked full time from when she was 3-6 months & it was hard. I just feel like I will miss her so much & that a year is so long. Plus though she'll mostly be with DH, she would have to be in daycare a few days a week in 6 months when he does his student teaching. Ugh, I probably sound like an ass because I'm sure many of you have to leave your babies to work full time for much longer than a year. I wish I didn't feel this way & the decision was easier. Part if me is like ugh I never intended to be full time, I had always planned to be home with my baby more, but the other part of me is like well it's just a year. If this is making sense at all & if anyone actually read all this, any thoughts/words of wisdom for me? I have to decide by tomorrow morning so I can call the company to see if it's still a possibility.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: I need all the wisdom you have (long)
I agree, take the job.
In the meantime it would give you stability while your H finishes his degree. I can imagine the position would provide a valuable learning experience should you open your own practice in the future.
It's the logical choice in this situation.
Being away from your baby may be hard, but it gets easier. I also agree that getting your foot in the door will probably help with going part time in the future if that is what you decide to do.
GL!
It really helps to hear opinions from outside the situation. You're absolutely right that it's the logical decision, hard as it may be for me emotionally. I told DH I don't just want to make this decision just for me, or even LO, I want to do what's best for our family. I think I will call this morning & let the company know, & we'll see what happens! Hopefully it's not too late. Thanks for helping me sort this out.
@MarlaSinger& you're so right about the head/heart thing.