Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss
Rahxy
member
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When does it get better?
Rahxy
member
I'm sorry if this is TMI in places, if to too long, or if I'm just boring or obnoxious. This is mostly just to get things off of my mind and into the open!
had a miscarriage on June 17th. I was 8 weeks pregnant with my first child. I went from being the happiest person on earth, to being scared out of my mind and covered in blood in an ER. I'm grateful my husband was there through everything, but as much reading and research as I did, I wasn't prepared for this.
I went in with spotting, and first thing they did was an ultrasound. When we couldn't find a heartbeat, I felt shattered. When I went to empty my bladder for the internal ultrasound afterwards, and it all happened, pretty much at once. The sac and everything passed whole. I didn't know what I was looking at until the doctor told me. I was in such shock at the amount of blood, and I couldn't make it stop. Seeing what would have been my baby just lying there, gone. It makes me feel sick.
I was going to be the first to bring in the next generation of the family. My whole life I've known that I was meant to be a mom. My husband and I are just so devastated. You see the statistics and you always just hope that you'll be one of the ones that makes it.
We hadn't told many people about the pregnancy, so it's hard to pretend I'm the same person I was a few months ago to people who have no idea. My family has been supportive, but it's just been so hard to process.
Weeks of bleeding, blood tests, feeling weak and sick, cramping, crying. I'm just keeping my fingers crossed that Aunt Flo comes soon and I can start feeling normal again.
At this point everyone else seems fine, but I still feel like a broken version of myself. Am I weak, or dwelling? Should I be okay by now? I know everyone heals at their own rate, but my husband was absolutely as crushed and hurt as I was, and he seems better now. I don't know how long it's appropriate to keep talking about it, and when you're supposed to just shut up and move on.
Sorry again if this is boring or too long!|)
had a miscarriage on June 17th. I was 8 weeks pregnant with my first child. I went from being the happiest person on earth, to being scared out of my mind and covered in blood in an ER. I'm grateful my husband was there through everything, but as much reading and research as I did, I wasn't prepared for this.
I went in with spotting, and first thing they did was an ultrasound. When we couldn't find a heartbeat, I felt shattered. When I went to empty my bladder for the internal ultrasound afterwards, and it all happened, pretty much at once. The sac and everything passed whole. I didn't know what I was looking at until the doctor told me. I was in such shock at the amount of blood, and I couldn't make it stop. Seeing what would have been my baby just lying there, gone. It makes me feel sick.
I was going to be the first to bring in the next generation of the family. My whole life I've known that I was meant to be a mom. My husband and I are just so devastated. You see the statistics and you always just hope that you'll be one of the ones that makes it.
We hadn't told many people about the pregnancy, so it's hard to pretend I'm the same person I was a few months ago to people who have no idea. My family has been supportive, but it's just been so hard to process.
Weeks of bleeding, blood tests, feeling weak and sick, cramping, crying. I'm just keeping my fingers crossed that Aunt Flo comes soon and I can start feeling normal again.
At this point everyone else seems fine, but I still feel like a broken version of myself. Am I weak, or dwelling? Should I be okay by now? I know everyone heals at their own rate, but my husband was absolutely as crushed and hurt as I was, and he seems better now. I don't know how long it's appropriate to keep talking about it, and when you're supposed to just shut up and move on.
Sorry again if this is boring or too long!
|) This discussion has been closed.
Re: When does it get better?
Hugs to you sweetie! You can absolutely take as long as you need and don't feel like there is something wrong. Guys are different because they only go through the emotional part - not physical. My DH is extremely unemotional so I never see much grief with him. Your hormones go on a roller coaster - I call it crashing because that's what it feels like to me. For most of us, it's really hard to accept that yesterday we were pregnant and today we aren't. My advice to you is to find someone you can confide in - a friend, sibling, therapist, this board, whoever, and just talk talk talk. Say everything - whether you feel it's silly or boring or crazy, it's ok. I don't have many friends so I really turned to this board during my first loss because I was so... Lost. Just remember that though you were given a rough hand, there's an extremely good chance you will have a happy and healthy pregnancy after this. Lots of love to you!
BFP #1: 05/2012 DS born 12/30/12
BFP #2: 02/2014 Natural M/C 03/2014 @ 7 weeks
BFP #3: 06/2014 EDD: 02/17/2015 M/C @ 7w2d, D&E 7/15/14
I have one friend I can talk to but I feel like I'm going to drown her in conversations about it! She's so sweet and understanding, maybe I need to just make the plunge and try to confide in another friend, see if that works out.
BFP #1: 05/2012 DS born 12/30/12
BFP #2: 02/2014 Natural M/C 03/2014 @ 7 weeks
BFP #3: 06/2014 EDD: 02/17/2015 M/C @ 7w2d, D&E 7/15/14
It's hard and it takes a lot of courage to get
BFP #1 12/02/11, M/C 12/08/11
BFP #2 04/06/12, DD born 12/20/12
BFP #3 06/09/14, M/C 06/15/14
BFP #1 7/6/2012, EDD 3/13/2013, Delivered 3/14/2013
BFP #2 1/7/2014: EDD:9/14 MC: 1/9/2014 (confirmed via blood work)
BFP #3 7/5/2014: EDD 3/11/2015 MC: 7/15/2014
BFP #4 11/7/2014: EDD 7/17/2015~~Please be my RAINBOW!
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