October 2014 Moms

Mom Vent~Long

So as most of you know my side of the story.
My mom and I don't get along well. Growing up was hard around her. There is a lot if junk under the bridge. I have tried to let it go and move on. BUT it is times like this that send me back to just not wanting to deal with her.
As some of you have read in the randoms threads ( As I did not think this needed it's own, but after today's interaction..) I am pretty upset with her.
Back story if you don't know: Late Sunday night I had some vision problems. Mainly with my left eye. DH was with me the whole time. At one point checked my BS numbers to see if that was the cause and it was fine. DH encouraged me to relax to see if it would go away. No ER trip due to vision coming and going and did not want to sit there for hours on end. They can't do most test because of LO. Did not call the doctor on Monday because my vision was fine by then. Did let the dietician know just in case. All information does get forwarded to OB and will tell them on my next appointment.
So I told my mom about Sunday not and she goes off on me. Telling me I need to take better care of myself. That the dietician is not going to do anything. I should of gone to the ER or called the on call doctor. Both of which I explained the above to her. I also tried to move on to telling her that LO was having outside movement and DH got to feel for the first time. She just could not be happy for me and DH.
So she calls daily to check on me as it is. First thing out of her mouth is "How is your vision?" I tell her no More problems and try not to be short with her. She then asks if I am lying. (Turning Point for me!) Tell her no I am not lying.
Needless to say our conversation was very one sided (her mainly) and pretty short.
So now I am even more upset with her.
I understand she cares. BUT, there comes a time in my life where I need her to stop beating me down and be a support person. It would be NOW. I have already had to tell her to back off the over protective mom and just listen. Now I have to do it again?!
She is again great sounding board for others, just not me. Right now I need a mom that would just let me vent and share my joys.

Thanks for letting me vent.
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Re: Mom Vent~Long

  • If I were in this situation I would tell her how her behavior is making you feel and then never tell her any health concerns again. Some people just can't handle this sort of thing. I would probably say that it is adding to your stress and while you appreciate her concern you are going to have to take a break from talking to her if she cant stop doing the things that are making you feel bad. Try to find a different support person for health scares.

    I may have missed your post but I would call your OBGYN about the vision issue and not wait for your next appointment or assume he or she knows because it was forwarded. I hope I don't sound like your mom, but that is one of the things my doctor has told me to call about, and it doesn't hurt to call.

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  • Sorry to hear about the tough relationship with your mom. I COMPLETELY get that. She does just care but I know it can be annoying and stressful when someone is so busy worrying and in their own mind that they miss everything else. I've learned to just keep certain things to myself unless I find out that are serious issues. Even still, my mom daily asks with extra worry and concern how I am feeling. One day I was super exhausted and slept all day at her house (two toddlers staying up too late and gas - sorry for the tmi - will do that to a pregnant mama) and she was freaking out "let me take you to the ER!!" I just rolled my eyes. Lol
    Hang in there!
  • Vision issues are on my call right away list from my OB. It can be a big sign of preeclampsia. So I would call today that is not something to mess around with.

    Sorry your mom is stressing you out but honestly to me it just seems like she is worried about you. If you don't want her asking about your medical concerns I would just stop telling her.
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