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When have you been judged?

coffeeandbookscoffeeandbooks member
edited July 2014 in May 2013 Moms
I was kind of inspired by the bump wide thread to think about when I have been judged poorly as a mom.

The major ones for me was being judged for bringing my one year old to a library event intended for older children.   The program was about having kids read to a service dog and I just brought my LO over to the dog to pet him.  I asked permission of the handler first and she was fine with it, but the librarian was giving me major stink eye.

I also got judged for bringing LO into our community pool.   This women kept saying that there was a baby pool which there is but you can't float in it and LO likes to float.

And lastly, I brought LO to the ocean.   We brought him just to the very edge to get his feet wet.   The waves were breaking at least thirty feet away from him but he was getting knocked down by the shallow water coming in.   We right were on top of him and he was laughing and loving it but I did catch a look of horror from another mom.

Those were my major "judged" moments....

What are yours?
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Re: When have you been judged?

  • emmy236emmy236 member
    1) from SIL, BIL, MIL for being horrified that we did baby lead weaning for the most part. DH and I preferred to make most of R's food and give him what we eat and we never cut it up into tiny pieces.

    2) same group judges us for going over to our next door neighbors deck once R goes to sleep. Like most newer neighborhoods our houses are really close so when R falls asleep we will walk the 25ft to the neighbors deck or garage for a drink and our video monitor reaches without a problem. My ILs have 10+ acres and where their patio is, is further than our neighbors but that doesn't matter.
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  • Boo0512Boo0512 member
    My MIL, FIL, and SIL are all way overprotective. They seriously treat DD like she's a piece of glass. I think that they feel I'm too laid back. When DD is doing something and I say it's fine they never listen and interfere anyway. I'll bring food that I've already cut up and tell MIL that thats the size she always eats and when I leave she cuts them up again into microscopic pieces. Helicopter in-laws, it makes me murdery.

    My kid is alive and knock on wood hasn't had any "real" injuries so I guess I'm not doing too bad.
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  • JoJo716JoJo716 member
    edited July 2014
    Co-sleeping was a big one that earned me lots of judgy stares and comments. One of my friends judged that we began feeding ds meat and more regular foods at 9 months. My mil passive aggressively judges everything. She is constantly making suggestions about how she would do things differently. She also treats ds like he is fragile and freaks out at everything I allow him to do.

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  • caden1206caden1206 member
    I got judged pretty hard once for making my daughter drink WCM. This was in a crunchier group and everyone was trying to tell me to nurse forever, give almond milk or another type of non-cow sourced milk unless it was raw, or change her diet to remove cows milk. One lady even went as far as to tell me she was probably allergic since she doesn't like it (she has had no reactions). I was all like "she will get use to it" and you would have thought I was abusing her.

    I have also been judged for extended breastfeeding, co-sleeping, holding her too much, and breastfeeding again by SO's family members.

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  • PumpkinAndThePeanutPumpkinAndThePeanut member
    ^ same here. I've probably been judged for bed-sharing, doing BLW and extended BFing but I don't tell people we do/did these things unless they ask. And everyone has been too polite to overtly say anything judgey.

    I'm sure I've been judged by co-workers (who don't have kids) for taking time out to pump at work.
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  • KashyKashy member
    If I'm being judged I don't notice.  And I probably get judged for something all the time. 

    The only thing I've noticed is when people realize I still BF they say "Oh, you still nurse him?"  I say "Yep, he still likes to and I still like to so I do"  and that's the end of it. 
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  • c-elizabethfc-elizabethf member
    I haven't really noticed to much. I know maybe i was judged because dd wasn't sleeping through the night and she would sleep with me..blah blah blah. 
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  • MamaMDMamaMD member
    I have been judged for breastfeeding and pumping by women I work with.  Nothing overt but little comments like "she isn't drinking from a cup yet?" or "mine drank formula and they are honors students."  I am still pumping at work (though less than before) so that's part of it I think.  Like @pcat13 said I hate being judged as a mom and it's really motivated me to work on not judging other moms.
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  • ordinary1ordinary1 member
    I have been judged for -having a child young (I was 21 when I got pregnant) -bed sharing -breast feeding -baby wearing -blw -getting pregnant before Annabelle turned 2

    The bed sharing, breast feeding, baby wearing, and blw judgement came from family and friends.  It has lessened throughout the year.  
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  • tee18tee18 member
    edited July 2014
    No outright judgements that I can remember. I'm sure some family have judged the BLW we did, until they saw it in action - I got the most comments of skepticism on that. 

    ETA - Oh yeah, I felt judged by the pedi when LO wasn't sleeping through the night yet . . .at 6 months!! lol I didn't take it too seriously though. 
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  • FmrAFBratFmrAFBrat member
    I've been judged for a lot of things....being an older mom, having losses, and rear facing my 2 year old until he hit the weight limit since the norm here is to turn them around at 1. My MIL hated that I breastfed the boys too.
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  • littledaisieslittledaisies member
    I've been judged for still nursing, nursing in public, not STTN, co-sleeping, having big dogs with a baby and  for being laid back with our son. It's been from family, friends, coworkers and even strangers.  I try not to let it bother me because no matter what I do, someone will have a problem with it.  


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  • kelseyhhkelseyhh member
    I've been judged by my side if the family for BFing, especially after 1. No one on that side if the family ever did, and they thought it was gross.
    I got majorly judged by my Inlaws for sleep training using CIO. They all bed share and hold for naps, etc. I have to get my sleep and I work every day, so that wasn't happening.
    I get judged for still wearing Emmett. Everyone says he's too old and should be walking everywhere. He does walk, but in stores and other public places I like having him on my back.
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  • littlewest1littlewest1 member
    I've judged myself for a few things but I don't know if others judge me or not (or I am unaware).  I judge myself on the fact that she really isn't using any words yet, that she's a chunky baby, that I didn't breast feed, that she still has a bottle of formula at night before bed, that I don't always make her wear shoes when we go out, that she's in the sun a lot, various other things I feel like I am probably doing wrong.

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  • mommatotwo2mommatotwo2 member
    Extended breastfeeding, sometimes cosleeping, not sttn, not letting her CIO.
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  • BananaLettuceBananaLettuce member
    edited July 2014
    @coffeeandbooks‌, I took my kid out in the ocean in his float until the water was up to my chest. I didn't notice anyone judging, but even if they were they get the finger from me.

    I've been judged for putting contacts in my son's eyes. You know, so he can see and shit. I just remind myself they are ignorant and uneducated and move on.
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  • kelseyhhkelseyhh member
    edited July 2014
    Ignore

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