Baby's Sex- anxiety!

katiescarlett1 · July 2014

So yesterday my husband and I found out we are having a GIRL! Yay!

But even though the U/S tech seemed confident, I couldn't tell what the heck I was looking at, haha. The "Girl" pic she printed is blurry and no more helpful.
I know it's stupid and irrational, but I am so scared we are going to get our minds (and nursery, shower, etc.) all set to girl-mode and it will end up being a boy.

Anyone else ever feel this way??

P.S. She's healthy and perfect so I'm beyond happy..just feels like an irrational pregnancy fear I wish I could shake! This planner wants to move forward with certainty.

katiescarlett1 · July 2014

Haha @DaisyBlinks, I feel the same way! Some parts are obvious, and some are more like "I'll take your word for it!!" :P

alexandrac86 · July 2014

Congrats on you baby girl! I asked questions at my last u/s too, besides the head I had no idea what I was looking at. Dh seemed to know more than me, oh well. Healthy baby is all I care about. As she gets bigger, it will be easier to see what we're looking at.

katiescarlett1 · July 2014

Thank you @alexandrac86! And you're right, healthy is the most important thing.

@Nicb13 Congrats on your girl...that's exactly me--I even asked "So you're like 100% sure, right???" and she said well we can't ever say 100% to anything but it's a girl. I just want the guarantee, haha, as silly as it sounds.

nikkitaplin · July 2014

Ive been told that if you are told its a girl...then it's a girl...boys can sometimes be misdiagnosed if done too early.

Congrats!!!!

=D>

katiescarlett1 · July 2014

Whew, I hadn't heard that, @nikkitaplin, that makes me feel so much better! And thank you!

nikkitaplin · July 2014

katiescarlett1 said:

Whew, I hadn't heard that, @nikkitaplin, that makes me feel so much better! And thank you!

The reason I say that is when I was pg with my daughter, they told us at two previous u/s that she was a boy...then on the third u/s they said are you happy you are a having a girl?? I was in utter shock. Told that tech the story and said ARE YOU SURE???? She said YES, sometimes a boy is mistaken because what they are looking at is either a boy part or the girl parts that haven't developed totally. But a girl is a girl is a girl...so YAY! You are having a girl! And when it comes to that part of the u/s, I don't know what I'm looking at either! LOL

PrimRoseMama · July 2014

I've never felt scared about the possibility of the sex being the opposite of what my tech said for a number of reasons 1) I prefer gender neutral themes anyway 2) I knew there was a 50/50 shot when TTC/gestating. So I didn't freak out at the thought of a boy or girl.

I understand a little feeling bummed for a brief second. Or even surprised? But no, never overly concerned or scared.

I don't want to sound like a Dick but this is such a first world worry it hurts. :-??

katiescarlett1 · July 2014

Relax, @PrimRoseMama, it's just a word choice. And I get that this is a petty concern, I said that in my post.

Thanks to the others that posted that get what I mean. Not everything needs to be taken SO literally.

PrimRoseMama · July 2014

katiescarlett1 said:
Relax, @PrimRoseMama, it's just a word choice. And I get that this is a petty concern, I said that in my post.

Thanks to the others that posted that get what I mean. Not everything needs to be taken SO literally.

Having anxiety over this seems silly to me. I can only go off what you post & you seemed pretty worked up to me. :-??

PrimRoseMama · July 2014

Nicb13 said:

PrimRoseMama said:

I've never felt scared about the possibility of the sex being the opposite of what my tech said for a number of reasons 1) I prefer gender neutral themes anyway 2) I knew there was a 50/50 shot when TTC/gestating. So I didn't freak out at the thought of a boy or girl.

I understand a little feeling bummed for a brief second. Or even surprised? But no, never overly concerned or scared.

I don't want to sound like a Dick but this is such a first world worry it hurts. :-??

Oh lord.

I'm LOL that anxiety over baby genitals is totes legit, but for someone to point out how absurd it is to get this worked up over the possibility of tech error warrants an "oh lord".

It's a funny old world.

*-:)

PrimRoseMama · July 2014

DaisyBlinks said:
I'm kind of LOLing at the irony of claiming being concerned about your baby's sex is a first world problem

"YOU THINK PEOPLE IN CHINA ARE WORRIED ABOUT THE SEX OF THEIR BABY?????"

ummmmm....about that....

So, you think it's a legit thing to have anxiety about? /:)

I really don't. The OP asked & I answered. #shrug

PrimRoseMama · July 2014

DaisyBlinks said:
It's less "damn, if the tech's wrong, I REALLY wanted a daughter and I'm pissed" and more "damn, if the tech is wrong I'm going to spend a lot of time returning all this pink shit".

Oh yeah, ok. I can definitely see the "omg-what-a-PITA" sentiment. That makes sense.

katiescarlett1 · July 2014

LOL at this convo.

@DaisyBlinks that is EXACTLY my concern! This is our first baby so if they're wrong, we don't have any backup stuff. And if you knew my family you'd know that TONS of girly, pink stuff is coming my way because it's the first granddaughter in the fam.

I just don't want to deal with that craziness AND a newborn. No gender disappointment here, I'm good with whatever...just want to know NOW, for simplicity's sake!

hdall0807 · July 2014

I went to an elective place and you get $100 if they are wrong hahaha. Pretty clear it's a boy and still was at the anatomy scan a week later.....but at least I will end up with $100 if its wrong

Unknown · July 2014

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allrightmeow · July 2014

Met a lady who went on and on about needing to know the sex now.

I told her to get the Harmony test if it was that damn serious. She was not high risk so her insurance wouldn't cover it but, she'd be able to buy all the pink/blue stuff her heart desired.

That was the last time she talked to me about it.

jneden · July 2014

I think a lot of moms probably wonder about this. Did you google other girl ultrasounds and compare yours? I did that with DD and it made me feel better but I goole everything! LOL

thegoodpotato · July 2014

etoille said:

nikkitaplin said:

Ive been told that if you are told its a girl...then it's a girl...boys can sometimes be misdiagnosed if done too early.

Congrats!!!!
=D>

Well this certainly wasn't the case for a lady on my BMB. Was told girl girl girl girl girl about a dozen times (she had several U/S due to IUGR amongst other concerns).

Delivery day = boy.

This is SO true... I worked with a guy who was told with both of his children that he was having a girl. And then the LO's happy birthday arrived and it was a boy (they were wrong twice)! His poor wife had to be put under general anesthesia for an emergency C-section with their first, and when she woke up, he said she was muttering over and over "I want to see my girl. I want to see my girl." and they had to tell her in her muddled state that it was a boy. She was very shocked and confused.

I think the thing is, if you see a penis down there, definitely a boy. I was told with my first that they only give you an 80% accuracy when they say it's a girl.

That being said, we were told with both of ours that they were girls, and they both were (even though with our second, my midwife got a sheet from the ultrasound clinic saying "gender undetermined").

wildflower75 · July 2014

etoille said:

Also I LOL everytime I hear someone cite being a planner as a reason for having to know the sex.

I'm a former team greener that had a realtor through her townhome two days before her induction at 40 weeks...so that we could sell it NINE MONTHS later (this past spring). I set deadlines and schedules and keep people on task for a living. I BREATHE planning. And I went Team Green.

You want to know. And that's fine. Whatever floats your boat. But don't cite 'planner' as a reason for wanting to know. If you need to know the sex in order to plan for a child then you're a shitty planner. You don't need to know the sex to plan, you need to know the sex for color choices which can easily be overcome by picking neutral things.

etoille ... THIS 100%

katiescarlett1 · July 2014

jneden, I tried looking at other ones but the pic we got with the sex was so damn blurry, lol. I'm good though, I'm just gonna go with what we were told, get neutral colors on the big things like stroller, carseat, etc. so they can be used again, and see what happens.

WashingtonQueen · July 2014

nikkitaplin said:

Ive been told that if you are told its a girl...then it's a girl...boys can sometimes be misdiagnosed if done too early.

Congrats!!!!
=D>

This makes absolutely no sense at all. What would a boy be misdiagnosed as? A girl. So if you're told it's a girl then it's for sure a girl, unless it's a boy misdiagnosed as a girl....

CreativeD1 · July 2014

If it is that much of a concern don't buy a bunch of boy or girl items and go neural. Or leave the tags on any boy or girl items you receive just in case. We are going neutral on all big ticket items (nursery decor, etc.) because as a FTM I don't want to have to repurchase if we have another of the opposite sex for our second (assuming this would be the only need to repurchase). We will find out the sex but this is my plan and it should cover any incorrect guess at U/S time.

GinnyJ2012 · July 2014

I was told boy at my a/s and when I saw the image it looked like those of my first boy. I keep having dreams about going into labor and they tell me baby is a girl. It wouldn't be a crisis if baby comes out a girl at all, but I would want to redecorate the room because I love pink frilly stuff. Most of the clothes we have would work, but I think the "handsome boy" type clothes would have to go back into storage. Either way I'll find out for sure at delivery!

Dani0329 · July 2014

nikkitaplin said:

Ive been told that if you are told its a girl...then it's a girl...boys can sometimes be misdiagnosed if done too early.

Congrats!!!!
=D>

I have heard the opposite. If the tech sees a penis, obviously boy. No penis, girl or boy not in the right position. Less chance of being incorrect with a boy. I'm not a tech, just information that was passed on to me.

BkBaby118 · July 2014

@katiescarlett1‌, this is me right now! I'm 25 weeks and had my anatomy scan at 18 weeks, when we happily found out we'll be having a girl. However, I also couldn't understand exactly what we were seeing, and to make matters more confusing, the sonographer said it was a little hard to tell. However, she typed "girl" on the photo so I'll just have to go with that!

MNgirl326 · July 2014

WashingtonQueen said:

nikkitaplin said:

Ive been told that if you are told its a girl...then it's a girl...boys can sometimes be misdiagnosed if done too early.

Congrats!!!!
=D>

This makes absolutely no sense at all. What would a boy be misdiagnosed as? A girl. So if you're told it's a girl then it's for sure a girl, unless it's a boy misdiagnosed as a girl....

what? i don't know what you are talking about

I had a student once that was diagnosed as a girl- they expected baby Kate and out came Baby Jake.

babies can get mis diagnosed girl as boy or boy as girl if they are done too early since the genitals basically look the same for quite awhile. A girl can also be seen as a boy if the cord is in the way. It is harder the other way around to make a mistake- a penis is a penis especially if done in the at the 16-20 week mark. But i'm sure it has happened before.

MNgirl326 · August 2014

shinyredsmartazz said:

MNgirl326 said:

WashingtonQueen said:

nikkitaplin said:

Ive been told that if you are told its a girl...then it's a girl...boys can sometimes be misdiagnosed if done too early.

Congrats!!!!
=D>

This makes absolutely no sense at all. What would a boy be misdiagnosed as? A girl. So if you're told it's a girl then it's for sure a girl, unless it's a boy misdiagnosed as a girl....

what? i don't know what you are talking about

I had a student once that was diagnosed as a girl- they expected baby Kate and out came Baby Jake.

babies can get mis diagnosed girl as boy or boy as girl if they are done too early since the genitals basically look the same for quite awhile. A girl can also be seen as a boy if the cord is in the way. It is harder the other way around to make a mistake- a penis is a penis especially if done in the at the 16-20 week mark. But i'm sure it has happened before.

I think her point was that a sex determination is not a "diagnosis". I could be wrong though. It's happened many times before.

oooohhhh, yeah i didn't get it then.

i knew "diagnosed" was the wrong term, but i used it to be consistent with all the PP. I didn't realize that the word is what she was referring too. Oops.

path75 · August 2014

etoille said:

nikkitaplin said:

Ive been told that if you are told its a girl...then it's a girl...boys can sometimes be misdiagnosed if done too early.

Congrats!!!!
=D>

Well this certainly wasn't the case for a lady on my BMB. Was told girl girl girl girl girl about a dozen times (she had several U/S due to IUGR amongst other concerns).

Delivery day = boy.

This happened to my sister's BF about 18 years ago. Apparently they didnt see the boy parts. She of course was into all pink. I plan to go neutral.

soulcupcake · August 2014

If it resembles a hamburger then it's a girl. Can you opt for an elective ultrasound at an ultrasound/imaging studio?

katiescarlett1 · August 2014

I want an elective, just to see her up close and personal, lol, but my husband is SO not into it.

Boo.

Knottie47877597 · August 2014

It would really be nice if people would hold their judgments aside, this should be a safe, supportive place for all to post questions and concerns. Nice to see some meaningful feedback, to those passing judgment publicly, shame on you.

Meery82 · August 2014

Knottie47877597 said:

It would really be nice if people would hold their judgments aside, this should be a safe, supportive place for all to post questions and concerns. Nice to see some meaningful feedback, to those passing judgment publicly, shame on you.

Newp. Shut your hole.

KMommytobe · August 2014

ICarriedAWatermelon said:

etoille said:

Also I LOL everytime I hear someone cite being a planner as a reason for having to know the sex.

I'm a former team greener that had a realtor through her townhome two days before her induction at 40 weeks...so that we could sell it NINE MONTHS later (this past spring). I set deadlines and schedules and keep people on task for a living. I BREATHE planning. And I went Team Green.

You want to know. And that's fine. Whatever floats your boat. But don't cite 'planner' as a reason for wanting to know. If you need to know the sex in order to plan for a child then you're a shitty planner. You don't need to know the sex to plan, you need to know the sex for color choices which can easily be overcome by picking neutral things.

Unless you don't like neutral shit, in which case you would like to PLAN for a certain nursery theme. Say, the Pottery Barn Madras collection which some might find better suited for a boy. Which is um... just an example.

Or you have a boatload of boy crap in a heap in a closet in your attic which you'd like to PLAN to donate if not needed and sort through by size etc in the event your next child is also a boy. Because you sure as hell don't want to deal with it after your second arrives, remembering how much having your first as a newborn threw you for a loop. I was lucky if I showered some days. Maybe you're just more skilled, but I work in the emergency department, and I had previously considered myself a pretty damn good multi-tasker. But anything I can get out of the way ahead of time... I will.

That said, if the u/s technician makes the wrong call, we're screwed.

Yeah I'm with you here. I absolutely needed to PLAN for a boy or a girl.

KMommytobe · August 2014

Dani0329 said:

nikkitaplin said:

Ive been told that if you are told its a girl...then it's a girl...boys can sometimes be misdiagnosed if done too early.

Congrats!!!!
=D>

I have heard the opposite. If the tech sees a penis, obviously boy. No penis, girl or boy not in the right position. Less chance of being incorrect with a boy. I'm not a tech, just information that was passed on to me.

Yeah same here! A penis is a penis but if they can't get a good look who knows!

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