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April 2014 Moms
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Need Advice from the BFing/Pumping Mamas

EnFuego12EnFuego12 member
in April 2014 Moms
Hey everyone! I recently returned to work (sad face!) and BF my LO while off on maternity leave. He will be 3 months old next week. I had trouble with bottle feeding him until I found the new Lansinoh mOmma bottles (which are awesome!). My mom is watching him for me and never BF, she's always used formula. I've tried to explain to her that BFing is different and the babies don't need as much. I've also given her literature to back up what I've learned (this is my first time BFing). She refuses to believe the baby doesn't want more and feeds him increasing amounts. I'm afraid that he's going to get used to it and I won't be able to satisfy him when I nurse him. I also don't want him overfed. Right now I think I've got her held at 4 oz every 2 hours but that's after I've pumped both sides (he only nurses on one at a time). She's already depleting all of my freezer supply (I've only been back to work for a week)!!

Can y'all offer any advice? Thanks in advance for any help and insight you can provide!
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Re: Need Advice from the BFing/Pumping Mamas

  • sishamariesishamarie member
    Im seriously in the exact same boat! I havent stressed it too much because she only watches her 2 days a week. I'd be freaking out if it was Mon-Friday. But I would definetly say something, nicely of course, I'm sure she is doing a great job other wise.

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  • RedDawnsRevengeRedDawnsRevenge member
    Have you discussed the reading together? Answered any questions she might have? I purposely froze my milk in 3-4oz bags just so that DH and MIL couldn't over feed DD1. I also only left 1.5oz for every hour I would be at work, they would have had to go out to the deep freeze for more, (more work for them). Make sure your nursing him very chance you get when you're home. I had a very hard time with my MIL and BFing since no one in her family has ever BFed. But after a while even she and DH began to to extra careful with it. But at first it was a very hard sell to MIL that DD did need more and more and that the volume stayed the same but the value increased.
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  • KatieGummowKatieGummow member
    lcr23 said:

    Take bottles premeasured to her each morning. I usually get bottles ready for DH and the other caretakers (my mom & aunt) since DH doesn't seem to think proper measuring is important. If you have them ready it takes it out of her hands.

    This. I will pre-measure all bottles and leave a list of feeding times (~3hr increments), and leave one extra bottle, just in case.
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  • Avion22Avion22 member
    Are they watching him for hunger cues?  Doing paced feedings?  

    I would request she feed him 3-4 ounce bottles, stopping to burp at least once halfway through, and then burping after.  If he's still showing hunger cues, then try a little more.  When allowed to eat at a normal pace, babies will usually stop eating when they're hungry (they might still suck on the bottle nipple, but not actually suck the food down, though some will spit the nipple out).   

    I think a lot of people of our parents' generation were taught that it was preferable to get the baby on a "schedule" of feedings, whereas we have been taught to watch for hunger cues and feed on demand.  
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  • lcr23lcr23 member
    gummybearstwo said:

    lcr23 said:

    Take bottles premeasured to her each morning. I usually get bottles ready for DH and the other caretakers (my mom & aunt) since DH doesn't seem to think proper measuring is important. If you have them ready it takes it out of her hands.

    This. I will pre-measure all bottles and leave a list of feeding times (~3hr increments), and leave one extra bottle, just in case.
    Not sure if you freeze milk but taking a frozen portion may be better as a backup that way there's no temptation to use it up. :)
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  • MamamonzoMamamonzo member
    I agree with the pre measured bottles. But this is really more of an issue of your mother respecting you and your wishes as the parent. I would be furious if my mother didn't follow the instructions that I've laid out for my child.

    You need to talk to her, and if she doesn't listen consider a different care provider. Who's to say she won't continue to ignore your wishes when it comes to other aspects of caring for your baby.

     

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  • Teresa1896Teresa1896 member
    I've fought the same battle with my ILs. They mean well but just don't know any different. The other day my fil gave DS a 6 oz bottle and then bragged that he was such a "big, hungry boy!" I said no, he was over fed! Kellymom.com has a good section on how to bottle feed BF babies- I've sent that to them to read.
    Also, pre measuring bottles helps.

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  • stgeiststgeist member
    Mamamonzo said:

    I agree with the pre measured bottles. But this is really more of an issue of your mother respecting you and your wishes as the parent. I would be furious if my mother didn't follow the instructions that I've laid out for my child.

    You need to talk to her, and if she doesn't listen consider a different care provider. Who's to say she won't continue to ignore your wishes when it comes to other aspects of caring for your baby.

    This! I hope things get better!
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  • EnFuego12EnFuego12 member
    Thanks everyone! I've found The book "The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding" to be extremely helpful as well as information from our board and Kellymom. I have shown and gone over the information with mom but she is very stuck in her ways. I guess I messed up giving her my whole freezer supply, but thought that made the most sense at the time. She thawed all of it, panicking that I wasn't giving her enough milk for the baby. I think she's realizing now that it's fine. I'm going to print a bunch of stuff for her to keep handy at home with her and see if that works.
    Thanks for the awesome advice as always and encouragement. This is DS3, but the first time I've ever had success with BFing and I'm determined to make it last! =)
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  • rlallen13rlallen13 member
    That is what I did as well. My mother n law came down last week to help out bc I went back to work. She did what she wanted to do i.e. Feeding him to much and not keeping him on schedule. So when I would come hm he was sleep and that was @5:30 n his last nap is normally at 3:30 or 4:00 he would wake up. Well I literally told her nicely we have to follow my schedule bc it allows him to sleep well at night. That week he was so off schedule but I believe it's important for the individual watching your child to abide by your rule, if not then your life will turn upside down.
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