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October 2013 Moms
Kikimomof3
member
Needing to Vent Update on Ex Husband Situation
Kikimomof3
member
Ok so the cheating ex just had another baby with the tramp who he cheated with. July 9th the baby was born on their 1 year anniversary. She posted this big blurb on facebook and I get it sent to me through a mutual friend. It says how wonderful he is and how they are now complete with their baby and thanks to him for her anniversary gift(the baby). I feel so upset, I mean our last and 4th baby is 9 months and she cries whenever she sees him because she does not know him well. He takes the other three for visits but refuses to take her because she's not OLD enough he says. I feel he #1 replaced me instantly with that young chick, #2 was not fair to the 4 children he already has and does not spend enough time with to have another baby. On top of that the photo that was messaged to me was him asleep with their baby. My older three all have pictures of them asleep with daddy, my precious number 4 does not and well Gosh it hurt so bad to see that ladies!!! I keep trying to just move on but one thing after the other just gets me emotional again.
Kikimomof3 
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Needing to Vent Update on Ex Husband Situation
Yes, you have a right to be upsetn with your ex, but try not to take your frustrations and hurt on the new baby. He/she did not ask to be brought into this world. Keep in mind your issue is with your ex husband not any of the kids.
He's a shitty dad but you can't force someone who doesn't want to be there, to be there. You can hold him to his end financially, but you can't force someone to live or nurture your child. You have to be strong and be a great parent for the both of you.
As your child gets older, he/she will come to his/her own conclusions about her daddy. Try to cconceal your feelings about your ex because that will only hurt your child more.
€ Lastly, stay off his and her Facebook page!! You'll never move on for get past the hurt if you allow yourself to be hurt by that stuff over and over again.
#2 due 12.23.17
I know it is easy to focus on and feel sad about all of the things LO is missing with him, but instead focus on all the wonderful things LO is experiencing with you. Set an example for all of your kids by being a strong woman who does not let asshat exes ruin their happiness.
edited to fix mistakes made because early morning mobile bumping is hard
Ask your mutual friends not to share the info with you since you are trying to move past this stage of your life. Unfortunately you cannot force a relationship between him and your children. Best of luck to you.
May Siggy: Baby in disguise
I believe @nryan55 has a number for poopsenders on speed dial if you wish to send a gift.
#sweetestbumpie?
Tell your mutual friend that sending you things off their FB is not helpful.
Eleanor 9.30.13
@kikimomof3 - So sorry that you are going through this. I agree with PP's, don't take it out on their new baby. But, I also understand how hurtful it must have been to see the picture of him with the new baby. Just be strong and positive for your kids. Eventually, karma will catch up to the asshole and his new wife (not wishing it on their baby, only them) and he will probably leave her. Keep a bottle of wine and a bag of popcorn on hand to celebrate when that happens
.
As for your comment about not making friends on here... I can't say that I have made any "close friends." I didn't have a labor buddy, there isn't any person that I PM with, or that I am FB friends with, or that I meet up with IRL. However, I get on TB everyday. The ladies on this board are super supportive, caring (as long as you aren't an asshat), and knowledgeable. This board has most definitely influenced my parenting and these ladies have played a major part in making me a better parent. You can't expect members of a message board to reach out to you. If you want more interaction or a closer "bond", you just have to participate more and reach out a little yourself. Just my opinion... I hope you situation gets easier.
Pps gave some good advice. Try to make some time for yourself and take care of you! "Mommy time" may be just the thing you need to continue with the healing process!
Also, I don't know where you are in the legal sense of things, but make sure you are looking out for you and your kids there. The Single Moms board can give you a lot of advice about that kind of stuff and some of the emotional part since they have often been through or are going through similar.
Good luck and keep posting.
Sorry. I wasn't trying to be a bitch. I'm just saying if she didn't feel like she made friends, or the least bit supported after the other posts about her husband, what made her come back here after months to update us? Its just odd that she's been away for so long and then would randomly think about a group of women she didn't feel friendly with or supported by. I didn't mean it as she shouldn't be here.
Sorry. I guess that wasn't my most sensitive response.
Op, i didn't mean to come off insensitive in my second response. I too didn't make many friends here until after our babies were born. I didn't post as much before then, but once I started to I found this board to be a great support system. I know what you're going through is very hard. I know it's hard to stay away from the pictures that are posted with your ex. I know this is not how things were supposed to be. I hope you stick around and that this board can be a place where you too find support and maybe make some friends.
Sorry you're going through all that. I totally agree with telling your friends not to send you that stuff. It only causes hurt. Unfriend him. Stay off his page. Otherwise it just brings it up again. There's obviously still a lot of hurt there.
I'm a single mom to one. I go from just wanting to cut all ties to thinking we can still make it work.
Kids makes it so much more complex! Hugs to you and hope your situation gets better!
Fuuuuuuck that dude. He's an asshole. I hope in time you can find a partner that will be there for you and your children.
Tell your friends to not send you pictures or updates of him anymore...that's not helping you at all. I have never been in a situation like this, but the whole cheating thing and him leaving you for another girl just makes my gag reflex go off. She's a dumbass if she thinks that he's not going to do that to her.
Stay strong for you and your kids, you've got this!
#mobileproblems
@ PharmTechMom1216
Thank you so much
It sounds like you've been through a lot. Keep your head up and power on.
Welcome back. Hope to see you posting around.
I've had to deal with a cheating husband as well (I've never shared that with anyone on here). I somewhat understand how you feel and I'm sorry you have to go through this. All PP advice has been great.