Going back to work/ first time mom

Kjoylace36 · July 2014

I'm totally freaking out right now. My baby is due august 2. I've been out on Fmla since June 11th. Suppose to go back in September. Just got offered a better job to start in September. And guess what , the more I think about my baby the more I don't want to leave my baby. Sending her to child care at such an early age frightens me. Do people actually leave their newborn with child Care. I know they do. But I'm going through a lot of mixed emotions. Don't want to lose the job opportunity and don't want to leave my baby. Lol. Life. !!!!
First time mom :-(

angelapeck1129 · July 2014

I'll be a FTM as well and due 9/2. As much as I hate the thought of it there's no way our family can afford for me to not work. So my baby boy will be in daycare at 6 weeks old

luckily there is a daycare right beside my work and my husband and I work together so we will be able to go see him at lunch. Just wanted you to know you're not alone in the work or stay home decision. It's rough but you gotta do what's best for your family

Fafalady · July 2014

I have two children with a third on the way. They have both been in daycare and stayed with family, and I really feel like daycare is my little secret. They benefit so much from a good daycare even as an infant. It will be hard at first but just be confident in your decision.

cozybluebear · July 2014

It will be the hardest thing you ever do! I planned to go back to work 8 weeks after my son was born, then I pushed it to 12 weeks, then I just gave up and became a stay at home Mom.

MexiBride08 · July 2014

It gets easier everyday... Promise. Build up is the the worst.

ADC1979 · July 2014

When are you going back in September? If early September (like around labor day) that seems awfully young, and I think most day cares require infants to be at lest 6-8 weeks old. And you have to remember, baby may not come on August 2nd...depending on your OB, they could let baby go as long as 42 weeks. (Mine doesn't like to go past 41, so your mileage may vary.) I'm due 7/20, but totally understand that I could go as late as 8/3 unless my doctor intervenes (which they will for my aforementioned reason.)

Hope things will work out for you, though! I also plan to go the daycare route, and I know once I get closer to that reality I'll be nervous, too!

ss265 · July 2014

It might help if you make a list of benefits to your child being in day care vs. you staying at home with him/her. There have been a couple of threads posted on the Working Moms board regarding the benefits of returning to work, which might help ease your mind.

FWIW, I personally left my son in DC starting at 8 weeks and I have no regrets. I think that DC really benefited him as an infant and he is a very adaptable child. However, working is very much tied to my identity and staying at home with my son was never an option. I am just a much happier person and a much better Mom because I work.

rlyttle · July 2014

I was lucky to have stayed home for 3 months with DS and it will be the same with this LO. Going back to work brought mixed feelings for me. I didn't want to leave DS, but I love having a career and I know I don't want to be a SAHM. It just became our new routine. It also made me cherish my time with DS more since I didn't see him during the day. You both will get through it. You will find a good routine that works for you. It all depends on finding someone that you trust with your LO. That takes a lot of stress away. GL!

Kjoylace36 · July 2014

Thanks everyone. I'm still looking for someone u can trust. I don't want to be a stay at home mom. I love my career. I guess I will figure something out.

Kjoylace36 · July 2014

*I can trust

beccalee721 · July 2014

My DD will be 23 months when DS is born. She's been going to daycare since 8 weeks and I don't see leaving him being any easier than when I went through it with her! You need to find a place that makes you feel comfortable and welcomed as soon as you walk in. The providers from DD's first infant room were so amazing and actually taught me a lot about getting her on a schedule etc and she has learned so much more from them and her "classmates" than I could have even dreamed of teaching her at home. I did drop her off for short periods of time the week before I went back to work and used that time to grocery shop or workout, etc. Just so I could get a little quiet time but I could go get here when I couldn't handle it anymore. That helped me get into the routine before dealing with the morning work routine as well, and helped me feel better because she was always okay when I went back to pick her up.

yeah. · July 2014

Why did you go out so early?

My second kid went to daycare at 7 weeks. She's fine. It can be done. It wasn't ideal but you do what you gotta do.

LindsayMae84 · July 2014

I'm a FTM, but I've worked in an infant room in a daycare. Its a great place for babies to be

don't worry, your LO will be just fine!

leela02 · July 2014

It sounds like your baby might not be old enough to put in daycare right when you return to work. It depends on when she's actually born, the daycare, and exactly when in September you have to start work. The daycare at my husband's work requires infants to be at least 6 weeks old. So make sure to have a backup child care arrangement in case you have to return to work before the daycare can accept her.

I feel the same anxieties though! I'm due in October and we're planning to have LO in daycare starting January when I plan to go back to school. We're planning to use the daycare at my husband's work, his coworkers said that they've had good experiences with it. So try to ask around for recommendations.

Daycare is not an ideal scenario for us but I'm in the middle of college right now and too invested to drop out. DH & I can't save enough $$ if I don't eventually graduate and work. I originally planned to be a SAHM for our child's first year before going back to school to finish my degree, but for the longest time we weren't having any luck getting prego. So I went ahead with school and that's when LO decides to arrive

You just do what you gotta do in the situation.

StefanyaMarie · July 2014

I'm not going to lie...it's hard. I worked until I had the baby with my first. I mean, I was getting ready for my last day of work when my water broke. So I got to stay home for the full 12 weeks with him. I was one of those people who thought I would go crazy being home and that going back to work would be a good thing. I grew up saying that I didn't mind having kids and I wanted kids but my husband could stay at home while I worked b/c staying home would drive me bonkers. Well, 12 weeks after my first was born I sat on the edge of my bed holding my little guy while he slept and just sobbed b/c I was leaving him. My husband works later than me so he would send me a picture of my baby once he was awake and dressed every morning to help me get through the day. He is going to be 3 in less than a month and I still get a picture every morning. It's hard, especially right away at the beginning. But it does get easier. Just remember that your child is going to be around other kids and learning new things every day, both good and bad. It's good for both of you to have a little time apart. Even if it is hard.

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