Talk to me about mealtime behavior

MomtobeNJ · July 2014

When you're home, do you ONLY eat meals at the table? Do you ever eat in the living room or family room with the TV on? If you can see the TV from the kitchen/dining room table, do you leave it on or turn it off while you eat? If LO wants to get down from the table, do you let them run back and take bites here and there?

This question brought to you by the fact that my daughter refuses to spend more than about 90 seconds sitting in her chair at the table. She is in a booster seat on a regular chair – the highchair went away along time ago. She wasn't having that anymore. So I am trying to decide how I should handle this going forward.

AKB090609 · July 2014

Normally all meals are at the dining room table, tv off, we sit until the last person is done eating. If DD asks to get down we remind her that we eat together and that if she chooses to get down we can't have a treat (desert). We don't let her eat if she's not sitting down.

We do 'picnics' on the living room floor on rainy days and Friday nights with a movie.

Edit to add: The main reason we only eat at the table (and DD complies) is our dogs will take her food if it's not at the table and kid does not like to share.

Unknown · July 2014

This content has been removed.

Holly_1007 · July 2014

We typically have dinner at the table. You can't see the tv from there. All of our meals are at the table because the dogs are food snatchers and the kids are just too messy if they aren't contained. Colby is still in his booster with a tray, keagan sits in a regular seat.

jayja2007 · July 2014

We try to eat at the table for most meals when it's all three of us. Dh likes to eat in front tv when I'm working.
When dd lets us know she's all done I tell her that we are still eating and wait a few more minutes. If she tells us again I put her down and let her play while dh and I finishes.

bosha711 · July 2014

We eat breakfast, lunch & dinner at the dining room table. No TV.

They are allowed to have drinks & snacks in the living room with the TV on.

DD is a very good eater in general, but every once in a blue moon, she is not in the mood. So, there have been a handful of times when she's gotten down to play & runs back for a bite.

We have the booster seat set up from DS, but DD is good in her high chair, so she mostly sits there.

Pokedot · July 2014

Our meals are a mixture of kitchen table, living room in his booster or on the deck now that it'd nice out. He's fiercely independent so when we set outside he has to be on a patio chair. We don't fight it. He usually sits much better when he is watching something however we don't make a habit of every meal there.

MRoxy0628 · July 2014

We eat dinner at the table together most of the time. The tv is usually off, but if it's on, we're not paying attention to it. Growing up my family always ate dinner at the table with the tv off, so Id like to continue that. Lunch is usually at the table too. For breakfast, we (lily and I) eat in the living room. During the school year, she eats breakfast at daycare. She sits in a chair that attaches to the table.

If you want her to sit with you, maybe make it less desirable to get up from the table, e.g. no tv on (if it's usually on).

LyndseylovesHugh · July 2014

Most meals we eat at the table, but sometimes I let her eat breakfast on the living room floor or couch, just depends on my mood and what she's eating. We always do dinner at the table and usually the tv is off, other wise she doesn't pay attention to eating.

She eats in a booster chair but lately has been fighting us on that because she wants to sit in a regular chair, but when she does she gets up and down. So I've been making her sit in her booster even if she's throwing a fit about it. We all sit together until everyone is done.

watercolor5 · July 2014

When we have company, we eat in the dining room with no distractions. When it's just the family, we eat in the living room with the tv on. It's actually the only time Sophia watches tv. When the kids are old enough to carry on a conversation, we'll do family time at the table with no tv, but as long as the tv serves as a distraction to allow mommy and daddy to shovel food in their mouths before someone starts crying, we'll keep it on.

Sophia stays in her booster seat until everyone is done eating. It's the same booster that is part of her highchair, and she's never had a problem whether it is on the stand, another chair, or the floor. We often finish eating and have to encourage her to try something new or eat more of the main course. When she has snacks, she can wander around with her snack cup, but she stays seated for meals.

MomtobeNJ · July 2014

I don't think this is a hill I want to die on. The problem is that there is very little consistency when it comes to meals. My husband works nights, so 5 nights a week it's just me and DD. I don't usually eat a big dinner, so I will sometimes snack while she's eating, but I do always try to sit with her. But since it's just the 2 of us I almost feel like she's bored. Lol. Then on weekends when DH is home and I want to sit down to a nice family meal, she's over it in like 5 minutes.

I let her eat breakfast in front of the TV once in a while too, so I think she just realizes she doesn't HAVE to eat at the table.

We'll see how it pans out. Although I won't allow her to walk through the living room with a bowl of spaghetti, I don't mind so much if she wants to get down and play and come back for bites here and there. And maybe we just need to work harder to make sure she's engaged while we eat.

MississippiCatfish · July 2014

We eat at the table, no TV, but I don't make Eddie wait until we're done. And I do give him bites if he wanders back and forth to the table (if he will take them.) He's never been good at sitting still, so I take what I can get. And like PP said, it's just not a hill I want to die on.

Hyaline · July 2014

We do most meals at the table, no TV, no toys, no distractions except us. She sits in a high chair and usually does really well with eating her food, watching us talk, joining in the conversation on random things like "Yellow" and "Cat." I don't make her wait until we're finished. She's learned to say "all done" or "up" when she's finished, and we honor that--it will someday become "may I be excused" lol.

I have no idea if anything we did encouraged this or if she's just a patient eater at mealtimes, but I will say--we've been consistent from the get-go that this is how it works. Except on rare occasions that we have a weekend "pizza and a movie" night and eat in the family room, we always eat at the same time, together (whoever is home), in the dining room.

I think you're smart to consider if this is a hill you want to die on, because my only advice would "unrelenting consistency" and if you don't want to do that, I'd just let it be.

linzeek44 · July 2014

All meals at the table. Occasionally a pretzel when he gets home from school and the rule is that he sits while eating so he usually sits on the floor.

tV is never on during a meal. E has never been allowed to leAve during a meal. We end the meal when it's clear that he is done but he is a big water so that is at the end of the meal anyway.

Yeah, I'm no fun when it comes to mealtimes haha but it works for us.

Flamingemu · July 2014

We are currently in transition here. She now refuses the booster. We stopped at Ikea last week and bought one of the tall , but still normal table height chairs. She likes ti enough.

All meals when L is awake are at the table, no tv. DH hates that she watches it, so it is rarely on when she is awake. If I actually want her to eat, she is allowed to get down and come back, but eating is done in the kitchen. Mostly because Shady would stalk her and it drove me nuts, since he knew to stay out of the kitchen at meal time, this was our solution.

MommaP12 · July 2014

New house: All meals at the table with no TV (we don't have a TV in the kitchen but will in a few months - previous owner left the wall mount up and we just painted around it). DD sits in high chair that's white plastic more like a restaurant high chair with no tray so she's eating at the table. She does okay, but at dinner she is done before us and I try to keep her in it longer but end up often taking her out and letting her play while the 3 of us finish. I don't mind TV while eating, I had it growing up and I still engage in conversation with everyone, it's more background - sometimes I even turned the Music Choice channels on while eating.

Old Condo - we had one open living area and all ate at the island. So 3 of us sat at the island with DD next to us in the high chair and the TV on. She still wanted out of the chair before we were done back then too, so not much difference.

We don't eat meals in any other room. I have a new couch coming and they are not eating in the living room once that arrives for sure!

hmp1 · July 2014

Meals are at the kitchen table always (unless we are eating on the patio or have company and we are eating in the formal dining). I do sometimes give them a snack at their little kid table but meals are at the big table. Leo is in a booster seat. He is usually the first one done. He says all done, I help him out of his seat, he takes his plate to the sink and washes his hands, then he is free to play while the rest of us finish our meal. He does not go back and forth from eating to playing. When he is done, he's done.

The TV is very very rarely on. If James is having an off night, sometimes I will have a show on just to get him to calm down and eat. He can see the tv from his chair but Leo's back is to the tv. He is not interested in tv yet so it isn't a big deal to him.

For the most part, meal times are pretty easy around here.

hmp1 · July 2014

Flamingemu said:

We are currently in transition here. She now refuses the booster. We stopped at Ikea last week and bought one of the tall , but still normal table height chairs. She likes ti enough.

All meals when L is awake are at the table, no tv. DH hates that she watches it, so it is rarely on when she is awake. If I actually want her to eat, she is allowed to get down and come back, but eating is done in the kitchen. Mostly because Shady would stalk her and it drove me nuts, since he knew to stay out of the kitchen at meal time, this was our solution.

The Jr Dining chair? James has been in one since Leo was born. I am about ready to buy another one for Leo. Love those.

Flamingemu · July 2014

hmp1 said:

Flamingemu said:

We are currently in transition here. She now refuses the booster. We stopped at Ikea last week and bought one of the tall , but still normal table height chairs. She likes ti enough.

All meals when L is awake are at the table, no tv. DH hates that she watches it, so it is rarely on when she is awake. If I actually want her to eat, she is allowed to get down and come back, but eating is done in the kitchen. Mostly because Shady would stalk her and it drove me nuts, since he knew to stay out of the kitchen at meal time, this was our solution.

The Jr Dining chair? James has been in one since Leo was born. I am about ready to buy another one for Leo. Love those.

Yes. It is great.

MommaP12 · July 2014

DD is only 21 pounds so this is the chair she sits in at the table. A neighbor gave it to us.

https://www.ikea.com/us/en/catalog/products/30069724/

tinyhumantoe · July 2014

Dh gives W breakfast in front of the tv on a little table. Dinners are in the dining room. Lunches are 50/50.

She tells us when she's all done, and she can leave. This came about after she would launch her plate into the air when she finished, then scream and squirm until we let her down. We are having her stay at the table a little more than we used to. I want her to learn to wait until everyone finishes, eventually.

OceanLover26 · July 2014

Dex eats at the table with his siblings. I try to sit them all down together so he can watch how they act at the table. It's nice because if he drops food off his tray they are like "no, don't drop your food, you eat it, like this!" and he actually listens to them, whereas with me he gives me a look and drops more. It's been really helpful with getting him used to utensils. He usually eats fast. Once he starts screwing around I know he's over it. I'm trying to get him to say "all done." He has "thank you" and "good job" down pretty well.

If we are eating a family style dinner where H and I both are sitting at the table I try to keep everyone there until everyone is for the most part done. I can't pass out desert to anyone until the two little ones are one because they'll deny the rest of their meal due to wanting what the others have for desert. But if it's a relaxed night where it's just me with the kids I'll get them up one at a time as they finish eating and run them through the bath while the others finish eating.

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