Really Struggling...

nswain85 · July 2014

Hey ladies,

I have been having a really tough time lately and just needed to get it out...

This week has been especially hard, I found out on Monday that my last day of work with my company will be August 31st. We knew that the location would be closing but thought we would at least have until the end of the year and now it's not looking like it. I have work insurance that my fertility clinic is able to use to get quite a bit covered but my OB coded all of my bloodwork and HSG test as "infertility" which is not covered (only underlying causes leading up to a diagnosis) no treatment. I have been fighting with my doctors office and insurance to get it covered and finally found a fabulous supervisor to help my but seeing the "we will be turning you over to collections of you don't pay immediately" notices are unnerving even though I know it's covered. I am so discouraged that pretty much all our plans of moving forward with the fertility clinic are put on hold because as of right now since I will have no job to pay for or partially cover. We have just gone back to where we were before now... Just trying naturally with good timing and hoping for the best after my surgery. I am really unable to see any hope in this attempt, it hasn't worked up until now?!

Then to top it all off my dad found out that the mass they removed from his bladder was cancerous... My heart is just broken. He is one of my best friends and the thought of losing of him or he being so sick is devastating me. He meets with an oncologist next week to find out a plan but I am so scared. I feel like everything is just crumbling around me... I'm so sorry to just unload this all but felt like getting it out there and asking for your good thoughts would be of some comfort to me right now. This group means a lot to me and knowing that there are other people out there going through is same crap journey as I am is comforting is that weird way we all know about : ) thanks for taking the time to read, it feels good to just release this, along with the good long cry I just had... Off to look for booze now

StacyLH24 · July 2014

I'm so sorry for everything you are going through. I hope your Dad will have a good prognosis and that he will come out on the other side as a healthy person. I'm also sorry for the loss of your job and the benefits that came with it. Maybe this will open a new door for you with better benefits. Sometimes there is something great ahead of us and we just need a little push to get us going.

BunnyBerry · July 2014

I'm so sorry for your father's diagnosis. I hope his treatment is smooth and successful.

It's so frustrating that the doctor's office wasn't more proactive about helping you get insurance coverage for testing. Those notices sound scary.

What a crummy time for your work to announce they're closing!!! Do you have any interesting prospects in mind, or is this the start of a really dreaded job search?

jencity9 · July 2014

((((Hugs)))) I am so sorry.

Sewfie · July 2014

I'm so sorry that you're going through so much, and all at the same time. <<<hugs>>>

juneroses · July 2014

I'm so sorry for all of your bad news. I hope your dad's doctors get his treatment plan created quickly, so you all can know the next steps and begin to take back control over this situation. Do you have an employee assistance program, it the opportunity to get outplacement services to help you in your job hunt? Generally, outplacement services are companies hired by your company who specialize in helping people in these types of positions - they work on resumes, networking, interviews, It sounds basic, but it really helps people take control of their next steps in beginning a job hunt. I helped evaluate one once, and the pope who took advantage of it found new positions much sooner than this who didn't. HR should be able to point you in the right direction. Hugs your way.

wanderlust508 · July 2014

Hugs, I'm so sorry for all that you have to deal with at once! IF is hard enough on its own ....to have a parent diagnosed with cancer makes it that much more difficult.

I am praying hard that your dad will have a good prognosis and while I'm at it, I'm also praying that you get your coverage figured out soon and have one less thing to stress about.

Autumray · July 2014

Super'(((hugs))) IF is such a pain in the ass!

masterofallcheese · July 2014

((Hugs)) That is a lot of hard stuff to deal with simultaneously.

JericaLH · July 2014

Let it all out girl, we can take it. Sometimes it helps just to get it off your chest.

theholmanherd · July 2014

I'm so sorry. My grandmother was just diagnosed with cancer and you know what? Cancer can go fuck itself. I'm sorry to be harsh, but that's how I feel. It's scary and awful and enraging at the same time. I hope your dad gets a good prognosis and they will be able to get rid of it easily.

As for your health care and job, I don't know what to say other than I'm sorry. I hope you find something soon.

jaco0207 · July 2014

Everything you are dealing with is hard on it's own, and it is so much harder combined. I am so sorry for all you are dealing with. Huge ((hugs))

lebradford · July 2014

I'm sorry you're having a rough time. I hope you can figure out a plan to get back to treatment soon (COBRA, a new job, a different insurance policy). You might want to look into the healthcare exchange. We purchase our insurance through there because it's a little bit cheaper than through my husband's job.

I'm sorry about your dad. It seems like when it rains, it pours. I'm far from an expert, but my friend's dad has bladder cancer and it seems easier (though that is relevant, of course) to treat than some other forms of cancer. I hope your dad has a good prognosis and that the treatment isn't too bad. ((hugs))

FLgirl812 · July 2014

Hugs. Sorry you're dealing with so much at once!

BandM14 · July 2014

I'm new here, but I read your post and wanted to say I'm so sorry for all that you are going through. Is COBRA an option even though the company is closing? I hope you are able to find a way to get coverage very soon!

I can't imagine finding out the news you got about your Dad. Sending prayers that the oncologist comes up with a solid treatment plan and that they are able to address it quickly and effectively! Lots of hugs to you.

emmuffy · July 2014

I'm sorry for everything you're going through. I hope your dad gets all the help he needs.

ronniesgirl1981 · July 2014

Darling, I am sending big hugs your way. Any piece of that would be too much to handle, let alone all at once.

cupcake122 · July 2014

So sorry to hear all this. Hugs and good vibes headed your way

nswain85 · July 2014

Thank you girls so so much for all the amazing support! This group is beyond amazing and I am so thankful to be a part of it

I do have the option for COBRA after my last day but it is quite expensive so I don't know if that is something we will be able to do. My husband has Kaiser through his work as an option and thankfully his comany sees the layoff of a a spouse as a life changing event so I will be able to get on there but Kiaser is it's own little world in that they have everything of their own and no outside coverage is available so I would have to use their IF resources. It's an option and I am not going to poo-poo it but I love my clinic!

I have been looking for a new job since February and have been able to use some recruiting services but nothing has come about yet... that part is discouraging but goes with the territory. Fingers crossed someone will like my resume soon! And my sweet dad has a positive attitude and is confident in his doctor so I am just going to follow his lead and take everything as it comes. I too have heard more positive things about bladder cancer being an easier treatment process so we are really hoping for that... Thank you all so much again, you all are amazing

nswain85 · July 2014

Thank you @rainbowbridge14 !

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