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2nd Maternity Leave

tatithomastatithomas member
in Working Moms

I work for a fairly small company - about 30 or so employees. I've been here over ten years, am a director level, and I like to think I'm well liked :)  My company graciously gives 3 months of paid leave which I was able to enjoy the end of 2013 with DS. We'll we're having number two, due early 2015 :) We couldn't be more excited as we always wanted children close in age and with DS it took us over a year to get pregnant.

However, the daunting task of having to tell my bosses this time around is making me a nervous wreck. The first time they were over the moon with excitement for me, but I feel like this time they will be a bit peeved as it's so close.  I already feel like they see me as only 80% of the worker I used to be pre-DS.  And to some degree they may have a point.  I don't stay till 6-7 anymore as I need to leave at 5 to get DS.  I am more hesitant to travel.  Now I feel like, on top of being annoyed that I'm going to be out again, they are going to assume I'll be returning at 60-70% capacity.  I wouldn't even be surprised if they are reluctant to give me the second leave.

Any advice/suggestions on how to break the news as easily as possible? :)

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Re: 2nd Maternity Leave

  • justjinnyjustjinny member
    I'm going to be taking my 2nd maternity leave in 2 years and my boss was still really happy for me. You shouldn't enter into the conversation feeling like you're doing something wrong by needing to take leave again.  Maternity leaves are necessary not only for your own healing but also for bonding with your new baby.  Keep in mind that you are a person first and an employee second - what happens in your family and life at home is more important than the needs of your workplace. 

    It might help you before initiating the conversation to sort of outline what you'd like to have as an ideal for this leave, and then what you'd be willing to negotiate to if your boss pushes back.  Even if you work for a company that doesn't legally have to do FMLA, if they have a written company policy or gave you paid leave last time, then I'd assume that's what's expected this time too.  That's at least good place to start from when discussing the terms of your leave.
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  • TheBorg7of9TheBorg7of9 member
    Don't feel bad.  You can't really be expected to plan your family around your job?  Don't apologize and just act like it's totally normal.  They have no right (legally or morally or professionally) to have a problem with it.
    My TTC History:
    2009: missed miscarriage #1 at 9 weeks (trisomy 16)
    2010: Infertility
    2011: Diagnosis and treatment (low sperm count, anastrozole for DH, clomid for me + IUI)
    2012: Baby #1
    2014: Baby #2
    October 2015: missed miscarriage #2 at 11 weeks (trisomy 22)
    March 2016 BFP#5, due November 2016.

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  • KayteeGeeKayteeGee member
    Don't feel bad.  I think this is fairly typical.  One of my employees has boys 16 months apart.  It was kind of a shock that we'd be losing her again so soon, but we were all really happy for her! She'd proven that was still awesome, so while it was inconvenient (because from my perspective as a manager mat leaves just ARE for the rest of the team) that didn't mean we resented her or thought she was a shirker. Family first! :)
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  • tatithomastatithomas member
    Thanks everyone! I'm definitely feeling a little better about having to tell them now!

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  • fitmom82fitmom82 member
    Mine are 2 years apart and I also went about it with a positive attitude, I think I told my principal something like I have some exciting news.  As a teacher we can take up to a year unpaid.  My principal did confront me because although DS was born in May I wasn't planning on returning until November.  I explained that I had that time with DD (although she was born in March so I came back in September) so I felt it was only fair to spend the same time with DS.  I don't know if this is your plan, but I also explained that this would probably be my last child and I wanted to enjoy my time at home.  She clearly didn't agree with me, and I was under the impression that I may be transfered, but I do my job well and she didn't like the guy she hired to replace me so when it was time to come back she was happy to have me.
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  • MommyAttyMommyAtty member
    My bosses were a little irritated. Mine are 21 mos apart. But I'm at a general director level, on my way to being an AVP (hopefully in the short term!), and I carry a ridiculously huge workload. I also ended up working throughout maternity leave because I have a high-profile case I'm working on and because I have a slightly weird legal skill set that isn't easily replicated by outside counsel and can't be taught in a few months. They quickly got over their irritation and were happy for me, especially when they figured out I was still a crazy workaholic, even with a new baby and a second kiddo who was 21 mos old.
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  • dglvrk2dglvrk2 member
    edited July 2014
    Close together or far apart.....there's never a perfect time to have a baby or subsequent babies. Keep in mind you would be taking maternity leave at some point in your career, likely in the next couple of years. Like PPs suggested, approach your boss with confidence.
    Also....regarding only giving 80% to your job now that you're a mom....I feel like I do this a lot. However, it's probably not the case. I think parents tend to work smarter because of their additional family commitments. I'm now more inclined to delegate tasks when possible and not do unnecessary tasks projects etc. Cut yourself some slack ;-)
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  • thedashthedash member
    I agree with PP's and also think you can focus on what you will do to make a successful plan for your leave. Use what worked well from your first leave and anything you could improve this time.
    DS: 2/17/11          DD: 9/4/13
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