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Pregnant after a Loss
2redtulips
member
January PAL siggie challenge; Good advice:
How do you feel about visitors once baby arrives?
2redtulips
member
_______________________________________________________________________
First-time mom, 35+, parenting after a loss (mmc Oct. 2012 @ 8 wks), ttc for a year after loss
January PAL siggie challenge; Good advice:
How do you feel about visitors once baby arrives? 90 votes
Bring 'em on! The more the merrier, and they can camp out as long as they want.
12%
11 votes
I am ok with some close family members stopping by and staying for longer periods, but I don't want a lot of people around
38%
35 votes
Eh. Short visits only! We need time/space with our baby.
33%
30 votes
Go away! We want to be alone.
4%
4 votes
We plan to have family (or a friend) stay with us for an extended period of time after the baby arrives.
8%
8 votes
We live with family/friends, so we have no choice!
0%
0 votes
SS
2%
2 votes
This discussion has been closed.
Re: How do you feel about visitors once baby arrives?
DH seems to think our parents are going to want to hang out at the hospital for the entire time I am in labor. :-P We can't control that, but I did tell him that his main job is to be there for me and baby -- not to babysit them.
Once we get home, I feel like I am going to want some days when it is just us. The thought of a constant stream of people - or of family camping out for full days at a time - makes me edgy. On the flip side, I might welcome the help (if they actually do help). I really don't know.
In any case, I voted "short visits only," because that's my preference right now.
January PAL siggie challenge; Good advice:
BFP #2: m/c at 7w, February, 2014
BFP #3: It's a BOY! Please be our rainbow! Due February, 2015
*everyone always welcome*
BFP #1, 3/12, EDD 11/9/12, MMC 3/27/12, D&C 4/10/12
BFP #2: 11/16/12, EDD 7/25/13, MMC 12/5/12, D&C 12/6/12, Complete molar pregnancy confirmed 2/9/13, benched for 6 months until August 2013
IUI #1, 8/16/13 Femara + Menopur, 3 mature follicles, BFN
IUI #3, 10/8/13 Femara + Menopur, six mature follicles, BFN
BFP #3, 12/9/2013, while on treatment break, EDD: 8/22/2014 Please stick and grow, LO!
Additional Dx: hypothyroidism, TgAb positive & anti-TPO positive, POR/DOR (2/2013), and suspected endometriosis
******All AL always welcome******
My Ovulation Chart Fruit
One time MIL texted that she wanted to come over. I told her flat out that it was a bad day and to please not come over. She freaking showed up anyways! I wanted to punchabitch!
Sorry this turned into more of a rant than I had intended! This is the one part of the NB days that I am not looking forward to.
BFP #2 11/3/10; BO at u/s 10w6d 12/16/10; Natural MC 1/7/11; D&C 4/21/11
BFP #3 10/27/11 Please stick, LO!! 2/6/12 It's a Girl! Alexis Grace born 6/29/12
BFP#4 4/27/14 Stick, stick, stick!! 8/11/14 It's a Boy! Evan Wesley born 1/8/15
"Patience is waiting. Not passively waiting. That is laziness. But to keep going when the going is hard and slow, that is patience." Let it Be (blog) ♥ My BFP Charts
This time I'm not leaving without you.
I am never ok with people showing up unannounced/uninvited.
January PAL siggie challenge; Good advice:
BFP #1, 3/12, EDD 11/9/12, MMC 3/27/12, D&C 4/10/12
BFP #2: 11/16/12, EDD 7/25/13, MMC 12/5/12, D&C 12/6/12, Complete molar pregnancy confirmed 2/9/13, benched for 6 months until August 2013
IUI #1, 8/16/13 Femara + Menopur, 3 mature follicles, BFN
IUI #3, 10/8/13 Femara + Menopur, six mature follicles, BFN
BFP #3, 12/9/2013, while on treatment break, EDD: 8/22/2014 Please stick and grow, LO!
Additional Dx: hypothyroidism, TgAb positive & anti-TPO positive, POR/DOR (2/2013), and suspected endometriosis
******All AL always welcome******
My Ovulation Chart Fruit
My husband and I have no problem kicking people out or saying no. Plus we live in a condo on the third floor that requires a buzzer so it's pretty hard for people to show up unplanned.
"It's, not, where you are, it's where you're going,
And it's, not, about the things you've done, it's what you're doing, now"
TTC Journey Began 8/12
BFP #1 11/9/12, MMC/D&C 12/21/12 @ 9w2d, EDD 7/24/13
SAs: 2%-3% Morph - RE Official Diagnosis Unexplained
BFN = IUI #1 (Clomid) | IUI #2 (Letrozole)
BFP #2 4/19/14 = IUI #3 (Letrozole)
Expecting Our Elf 12/27/14
~All Welcome~
BFP #2: m/c at 7w, February, 2014
BFP #3: It's a BOY! Please be our rainbow! Due February, 2015
*everyone always welcome*
Thankfully my SIL already set some boundaries on that side of the family when her little one was born. We have very similar attitudes about needing space, so that should help. My birthmom lives a state away,so so she will probably pop in for a long weekend or a week and will be fine. My mom will be the biggest trouble and I'm already experiencing it with the foster we will be bringing home soon.
I get a call everyday...do you have her, can I come over, why can't I come over, oh please can I come over? Honestly she sounds like a six year old. I've told her repeatedly that I've only had 24-48 hours to get lots of things done to prepare and when we feel that we have gotten a bit settled we'll have family over. I remind her that when she adopted me she wasn't working full time and trying to get prepared in between meetings. Finally yesterday I had to tell her, respectfully I think, that she was driving me crazy. She chuckled, but I'm not sure it will change anything.
Ok, that turned into a surprise rant! I guess it's a good problem to have to have so much family excited to meet the little one!!
I never want anyone there when I'm in labor, but when LO arrives (and we are settled into our room) I loved visitors.
When DS was born I had a 3rd-4th degree tear an was pretty uncomfortable. It was great having extra hands to help out with meal prep and just getting things for me.
This time my mom will have DS and will be helping out again. I am sure I will need some help with household chores and running after a 2 year old. As for friends, as long as they have had their flu shot they are welcome. I am due in January (again) and flu season is something I take very seriously. Last year we had 2 children die if flu in my hospital. I don't mess around when it comes to flu shots.
TTC since 11/2009; Lap/HSG/Hysteroscopy: 5/2011 (endometriosis - removed; endocervical polyp - removed; high pressure in bilateral tubes - cleared)
BFP #1: 8/4/11; DS1 born sleeping on 11/16/11 at 19w1d
BFP # 2: 5/7/12, EDD 1/10/13, DS2 born 1/4/13
BFP # 3: 11/8/13, EDD 7/17/14, mmc 10wks
BFP # 4: 5/16/14, EDD 1/15/15, praying for our 2nd rainbow baby
BFP #2 11/3/10; BO at u/s 10w6d 12/16/10; Natural MC 1/7/11; D&C 4/21/11
BFP #3 10/27/11 Please stick, LO!! 2/6/12 It's a Girl! Alexis Grace born 6/29/12
BFP#4 4/27/14 Stick, stick, stick!! 8/11/14 It's a Boy! Evan Wesley born 1/8/15
"Patience is waiting. Not passively waiting. That is laziness. But to keep going when the going is hard and slow, that is patience." Let it Be (blog) ♥ My BFP Charts
This time I'm not leaving without you.
My daughter was born in July and we still limited her contact with anyone other than immediate family for six weeks. That was mostly my husband's wishes, but I was ok with it. She needed time to build up her immune system and get those first shots. Our friends and family laughd at it a bit, but respected our wishes.