I don't know whether to be sad, angry, or pull my child out of daycare...

CoachTay · July 2014

Ok, so maybe the last one is a bit dramatic but...

While giving B a bath, I discovered a bite mark on her shoulder blade. Like, I can count how many top and bottom teeth the biter had. Our daycare provider had previously mentioned that one of the little girls there was biting (this was months ago). I'm not sure if she was the offender this time, but if she was, I have a big problem with that.

I know things are going to happen, but if it's a frequent occurrenceoccur that's a whole different story. Of course, I don't want B to get bitten... but my other big concern is I DO NOT want her learning that behavior.

I sent a picture of the bite mark to our provider. I'll talk to her more about it tomorrow.

Any other mommies with experience?

Kate_C · July 2014

Biting is a common issue, especially around that age. Talk to the DCP about it to make sure they're aware of it and are being proactive about supervising kids they know are prone to biting. It can happen in a split second so I wouldn't go too over the top about it until you talk to them about what happened and what they're doing to address it.

My son went through a long phase around that age of being a biter. I was frequently the victim. We tried just about everything to discourage the behavior, but it just took time. I know our DCP was on top of trying to prevent him and another little girl around his age from biting, since they were both prone to it, but it still happened.

JSS1002 · July 2014

Super common -- James was the biter on two occasions and I was horrified... And then some kid chomped on him... Teachers weren't concerned, they handled it well both with the kids and the parents... It hasn't been a problem since the first two times he bit. I'm probably more laid back than most about this stuff but I really don't think this is a big deal.

The only thing that would bother me abojt this situation is that the DCP didn't address it dirextly with you right away after it happened.

arschm02 · July 2014

Sigh* DCP here. If there is a biter in the room she will bite. The teacher can not be on top of her 100% of the time. It is age appropriate because they do not have the language to speak their frustrations. It will get better but it will take time. Unless your child is being targeted by this child, I wouldn't worry about it. I would, however, make your dcp aware of it so they can keep a closer eye on the biter. That should be caught (even if it's not quite fast enough to stop the bite) and you should be notified. I also wouldn't worry too much about your child learning the behavior. Some kids do it and some don't. For about 2 months, William was bit in his room almost daily (2 different biters, he is up in everyone's personal space and his teacher just sort of sucked). He has never tried to bite another child. Sorry you're dealing with this.

BellaBean76 · July 2014

I don't get on here much anymore...G does not allow me to bump while she is awake. But @arschm02‌ I love the new profile photo!!!! (Sorry if it's been up a while) I agree with the others...I would be more upset they didn't notify you. It happens. G went through an awful biting phase...luckily it was almost always directed at me. She has gotten much better in recent weeks, so hopefully it passes for the offender soon as well.

woohoo02 · July 2014

I'm a DCP too ... and unfortunately, biting seems to come with the territory at this age until around 2 or so when they have more words to express their feelings/frustrations. Like others said, my concern would be that your DCP didn't catch it and document it right away. I would hope that the teachers are being proactive in helping any biters learn other ways to express themselves and redirecting them to acceptable behaviors.

megandscott07 · July 2014

I would try not to overreact. My son bites when he's really tired or his teeth are really hurting him. I don't think they understand that it's hurting someone at this age.

CoachTay · July 2014

Thanks everyone. While I know this can be a common occurrence for this age, its reassuring to hear that others have experienced it.

I think what I'm struggling with the most is that she wasn't even aware that it happened. I did send her a picture of it last night and she said it was likely the little girl that I thought it was since she's been the only one biting. Our DCP said she's been frequently biting several of the other kids there, and really targeting one of the little boys. And, she said that she probably bit B because she was taking the toys she was playing with. What was hear for me to understand was that she didn't really say if anything was being done to prevent/redirect the behavior.

We've loved having B there for the past year, but this kind of threw me. I know things are going to happen anywhere she would go, butI just am having a hard time knowing that thisbhas been a frequent problem for the offender for several months. Luckily, after today, B won't have to go back until school starts up again in late August. She's only gone a couple of days since the beginning ofJune.

JSS1002 · July 2014

Just wanted to comment also that our daycare had a pretty firm policy that they will not tell the parents of the bitee who the biter was and vice versa.

I don't know whether to be sad, angry, or pull my child out of daycare...

Re: I don't know whether to be sad, angry, or pull my child out of daycare...

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