I had my first IUI last weekend. My boyfriend and I are not married, not engaged and really don't plan to be for awhile. I'm 29, he's 34. We've been together 8 years and live together. We both obviously made the decision for me to stop BC a year and a half ago and to see gyn/re when nothing was happening. But, I still feel like I can't tell people we are actively trying to get pregnant. We decided awhile ago we would start trying when I finished grad school. We thought it would be easy and could explain it to people as "oops, look what happened but we are excited" type thing. I assume most people here are married. How would you react to a non married couple going thru IF treatment? Am I over thinking it?
My DH and I started trying long before we were married and even engaged! It just so happened that well...nothing happened and we decided to tie the knot after almost 2 years of trying! All getting married did was encourage people to CONSTANTLY ask when we're having a LO...ugh! Nobody here will judge you and best of luck!!
***SIGGY WARNING***
me: 28 - all test normal DH: 33 - SA normal *unexplained*
TTC since September 2011 2011-Oct.2013 - trying off and on, ob/gyn, no meds November 2013-December-EOD, ob/gyn, no meds January 2014- ob/gyn ordered Clomid (50 mg) unmonitored, EOD-BFN February-Clomid 50 mg. unmontiored, EOD - BFN March-Switched to RE April- 100 mg Clomid/Ovidrel-BFN May - 100 mg Clomid/Ovidrel-BFN June-*BREAK/Switch RE* July- 5 mg Femara/Ovidrel + IUI #1- BFN August- 5 mg Femara/Ovidrel + IUI #2 - BFP!!!!
Thanks for the positive responses! I honestly feel if we were open about it with our families they would totally support us. I guess since we both come from families where our parents are still married had kids after they were married, I feel certain pressures to live up to that. But thanks for making me feel better about all this. I don't need any extra stress at this time!
Omg I am so happy to see your post. I'm not married either, but use the term DH. I am divorced so I am in no rush to get married again, but we feel we are ready for a baby and have been for over two years. My parents and a few friends know we are seeking fertility treatments and have been supportive. My family just wants me to be happy and it helps they are dying for grandchildren. If you need the support of family and friends I would suggest telling them, especially if you think they will be supportive.
Me: 33, DH: 32
TTC: 2 years Fertility blood tests all normal Tilted uterus 3 day ultrasound 17 follicles HSG: 11/13/13- tubes open DH SA: SUPER sperm (145 million, 84% motility, 22% morphology) All infection disease and immunity blood tests NORMAL FIRST IUI May 2014: 100 mg Clomid days 5-9, third ultrasound CD 13 revealed four follicles 27, 24 and 20 and 13mm. Trigger shot May 28 with IUI May 29 and 30 (fingers crossed) - BFN started spotting 11DPO
IUI #2 B2B 6/23 and 6/24, three mature eggs and 130 million sperm! FX this is the month! BFN 7/8
3rd cycle benched due to cysts - TI with OPK tests - BFN
3rd mediated cycle: Clomid+Trigger+TI (three follies left side, one on right as usual....what the hell right ovary get it together and produce some damn follicles!) 7DPO progesterone level 43 with NO suppositories YAY for a natural strong ovulation. Beta canceled started spotting 13DPO - Third time is not a CHARM! 14 day cycle WTF! Everything looks normal - RE wants to start injectables next cycle so this cycle I'm benched
Officially benched until March....but still plan on trying the baking soda douche due to my excessive and thick CM
JANUARY SIGGY CHALLENGE...This is so me!
Love this man....he was so before his time in his thoughts and ideas about the world....been obsessed about him lately bringing it back to the early 90s.
I'd be super surprised if you got any negativity from this board about not being married! We might call MUD if you said your were 19 and started trying on your second date, but otherwise we are a pretty easy-going bunch. Good luck!
If it's your plan to get pregnant before you're married, then I hope you do I assume most ladies on this board are married, but i don't think it matters. My heart goes out to every woman who has IF issues, Married,single, young, old, trying for 1 year or 5 years. I hope you don't get negativity from people in your life who don't understand what you're going through. I bet you won't get any here though!
It definitely doesn't bother me at all if someone is TTC before getting married (or not getting married at all). We considered trying beforehand, but I didn't want to be pregnant for my wedding or honeymoon. (Ha!)
**siggy warning** **everyone welcome**
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
DS- 11.07.02
DSS- 6.26.04
Married- 6.29.13
TTC Again- Sept. 2013
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Test Results/Diagnosis-HSG & SA totally normal
DX: 3/2014 Prolactinoma/Hyperprolactinemia- Started cabergoline 2/2014
5/2014 Possible mild PCOS in addition to hyperprolactinemia??
7/2014 Adding probable tubal factor to the diagnosis list
9/2014 And now adding hypothyroid to the list- Started synthroid 9/2014
Slowly rising betas - Ectopic suspected on 8/8/14 & confirmed on 8/11/14
Methotrexate on 8/12/14 -HCG negative on 9/2/14
IVF #1- November- Antagonist protocol: 11/1: start stims, 200iu of Follistim; 11/12 ER 17R/14M/14F; 11/17 5 day transfer of two blasts, 2 blasts and 2 expanding morulas frozen; 11/22 BFP!! (On FRER at 5dp5dt)
Betas: 9dp5dt 205, 11dp5dt 497, 14dp5dt 1,709
u/s at 5w0d- 1 sac; u/s at 6w0d 1 baby with heartbeat, another sac without a heartbeat
I honestly don't think it matters it's a personal preference. I have a friend that never got married, has 2 children, bought land and built a house with her boyfriend. To each their own!
Families come in all different sizes, colors, shapes and everything in between. Don't let anyone let you feel less than you are because you don't have a marriage certificate.
You know what is best for the two of you. There's no road map that you need to follow when it comes to having YOUR family.
We also started before we were even engaged. We were only together a short time though before we decided to try. We were dating only 5 months when we moved in together and we started trying 3 months after we moved in together. Most people probably would have thought we were insane, but we knew we wanted to be together for life and to have children.
If it had been up to my husband, I would have been off BCPs on our first date lol.
Now we've been together for 3 & a half years, TTC for 2 years & 9 months, and been married for ALMOST one year (anniversary July 27th!)
*** If you want to know where I (and soo many others) have gone, click here ***
Well thank you all for reaffirming that we need to do whats best for us! Although, deep down, I do know that, it still helps to have others back me up on it .
Good for you! DH and I started trying before our wedding because we knew there were issues and we didn't want to waste any time. My RE's office screwed it up exactly once and then got it right every other time. I wish you the very best of luck!
Me (34): MTHFR, PCOS, Endo, left salpingectomy due to hydrosalpinx,
hypothyroidism, low AMH (0.26)/normal FSH/average AFC of 12
Him (33): No known issues
November 2013-March 2014: Natural cycles
April 2014: Clomid 100mg and Ovidrel trigger --BFN
Families come in all different sizes, colors, shapes and everything in between. Don't let anyone let you feel less than you are because you don't have a marriage certificate.
Exactly!
When you are ready to do something in life do it. You both are ready to have a child so you shouldn't let anyone tell you you aren't ready/can't for any reason.
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I get where you are coming from. H and I started trying when we were engaged. When I made the appointment to get my IUD out with my OBGYN I felt a little uncomfortable talking to her about TTC since I wasn't married. It was unwarranted though. I doubt she thought twice about it.
Now that we are married I feel more comfortable that I can mark the "married" box on the forms, but it is more my insecurity than any real judgement. And it sounds silly now that I type it... "I like being able to check a certain box on a form" That makes me sound like a lame people pleaser.
Re: So...I'm not married
***SIGGY WARNING***
me: 28 - all test normal
DH: 33 - SA normal
*unexplained*
TTC since September 2011
2011-Oct.2013 - trying off and on, ob/gyn, no meds
November 2013-December-EOD, ob/gyn, no meds
January 2014- ob/gyn ordered Clomid (50 mg) unmonitored, EOD-BFN
February-Clomid 50 mg. unmontiored, EOD - BFN
March-Switched to RE
April- 100 mg Clomid/Ovidrel-BFN
May - 100 mg Clomid/Ovidrel-BFN
June-*BREAK/Switch RE*
July- 5 mg Femara/Ovidrel + IUI #1- BFN
August- 5 mg Femara/Ovidrel + IUI #2 - BFP!!!!
EDD: May 7th, 2015: Team PINK
Me: 33, DH: 32
TTC: 2 years
Fertility blood tests all normal
Tilted uterus
3 day ultrasound 17 follicles
HSG: 11/13/13- tubes open
DH SA: SUPER sperm (145 million, 84% motility, 22% morphology)
All infection disease and immunity blood tests NORMAL
FIRST IUI May 2014: 100 mg Clomid days 5-9, third ultrasound CD 13 revealed four follicles 27, 24 and 20 and 13mm. Trigger shot May 28 with IUI May 29 and 30 (fingers crossed) - BFN started spotting 11DPO
IUI #2 B2B 6/23 and 6/24, three mature eggs and 130 million sperm! FX this is the month! BFN 7/8
3rd cycle benched due to cysts - TI with OPK tests - BFN
3rd mediated cycle: Clomid+Trigger+TI (three follies left side, one on right as usual....what the hell right ovary get it together and produce some damn follicles!) 7DPO progesterone level 43 with NO suppositories YAY for a natural strong ovulation. Beta canceled started spotting 13DPO - Third time is not a CHARM! 14 day cycle WTF! Everything looks normal - RE wants to start injectables next cycle so this cycle I'm benched
Officially benched until March....but still plan on trying the baking soda douche due to my excessive and thick CM
JANUARY SIGGY CHALLENGE...This is so me!
Love this man....he was so before his time in his thoughts and ideas about the world....been obsessed about him lately bringing it back to the early 90s.
Never thought I would like long hair....
TTC since 08/2012
DX: DOR
I hope you don't get negativity from people in your life who don't understand what you're going through. I bet you won't get any here though!
Me: 29, DH: 30
Married: April, 2011; TTC: July, 2012
Dx: MFI; June '14 IVF w/ ICSI: 11R, 8M, 5F... 1 5dt, beta #1: 213, beta #2: 621, beta #3: 8545!
When you are ready to do something in life do it. You both are ready to have a child so you shouldn't let anyone tell you you aren't ready/can't for any reason.
TTC #1
Me: AMA, DH: MFI
Official DX - MFI due to Hemochromatosis
IVF #1 Nov. 2014 - ER 11/10 (10R 6M 6F) - ET 11/13
3DT of 3 embies - no frosties - CP = BFFN!!!!
****All Welcome****