TTC After a Loss

Intro (loss and friends pregnancy mentioned)

Hi ladies and happy 4th to you all! It's been a little over 5 months since we lost our little angel. It was extra hard for me because around that same time, my brother announced he was going to be a daddy for the first time! DH and I decided not to tell him and his girlfriend about our loss. If things couldn't get worse, it seems like each month I have been finding out that friends, and friends of friends are getting pregnant, which makes me feel horrible. My brothers g/f will be having her baby shower this month and I can't help thinking that this could have been me (I feel selfish). Anyway, DH and I are have started to TTC this month. I've been a little negative about the whole thing. I'm just so afraid that what we went through will happen again. We have decided not to tell anyone that we are TTC.
Pregnancy Ticker

Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker


BFP #1 12/23/13 MMC 01/24/14 @ 9w5days

Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

 

Re: Intro (loss and friends pregnancy mentioned)

  • I'm sorry for your loss.  Welcome to the board- I hope you find the support you need while you're here.

    BFP #1- 4/2011; DD Brynn born 12/2011

    BFP #2- 7/13; EDD- 4/2/14; Lost DS at 20 weeks (11/16/13) due to cord accident

    BFP #3- 3/14; EDD- 11/28/14; Lost DD at 15 weeks (6/7/14)- cause unknown

    To my angels- I held you every second of your lives and I'll love you every second of mine.

     

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  • rslh10rslh10 member
    Welcome to the board. I'm so sorry for your loss.
    image
    Hubs & I -29 • Met 5/18/04 • Married 5/8/10
    BFP #1 DS 2/7/11 (Born @ 34 wks via ECS due to Pre-e) TTC #2 since Aug '13
    DX Low AMH (.58) March '14 • FSH-7.5 • E2-35.5 (Nov '14)
    SA- Great numbers • SIS- Clear (Nov '14)
     Cycle 1- Clomid CD3-7 & Trigger-BFP • EDD 1/12/15 
    Ectopic @ 5w6d • Methotrexate Shot 5/18/14
    Cycle 2,3,4- Clomid CD3-7 & Trigger-- BFN
    Cycle 5- Letrozole CD3-7 & Trigger BFFN
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    • Everyone Welcom
    TTCAL January Siggy Challenge • Animal Snow Interactions
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  • tlc35tlc35 member
    I'm sorry for your loss and welcome to the board.  Most of us have felt jealous/upset/bad about others' pregnancies.  It is hard.
    Me: 37                                               
    DH: 45
    BFP #1 3/19/14  EDD 11/29/14 MMC D&C 4/24/14
    BFP #2  12/4/14 Beta #1 218 at 12dpo Beta #2 1055 at 16dpo
    Saw heartbeat 12/29.  Please be a rainbow.
    imagerainbows
              
    All welcome                                   
                              
  • So sorry for your loss. Don't feel selfish. I feel the same way. I am happy for them, but there is so much pain and jealousy in my own heart over their gift. We are all there with you!
    "As soon as I saw you I knew an adventure was going to happen." ~Winnie the Pooh
  • Km380Km380 member
    I'm sorry for your loss, welcome to the board. Don't feel selfish, we all understand (just read the tp thread pretty much any day) I hope you find support here.

    PgAL welcome


    Married 6/11/2011

    Me & Hubby: 34

    TTC journey started 12/2012

    BFP #1 6/5/2013, MC confirmed 6/26/2013 @ 7 wks

    BFP#2 8/25/2013 MC confirmed 10/16/2013 @ 12 wks (D&C 10/18)

    Diagnosis: unexplained RPL, unexplained IF.

    Also have hypothyroidism

    Started TTC again 12/2013

     

    IUI#1:Clomid CD 3-7, Trigger'ed CD 12. IUI CD 14. BFN

    IUI #2:Letrozole CD 3 - 7, Follistim CD 9, Trigger CD 10, IUI CD12. BFN

    Current plan: IVF with PGD. Antagonist - Vivelle Protocal. Stim start 12/1. ER 12/14.

    http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/502498

    image imageimage

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  • Welcome and so sorry for your loss. You're not selfish- sounds perfectly normal to me. It's such a mix of emotions being happy for someone but sorry for yourself and wishing things were different. This board is a great place for support. Hugs!
    image
    DS1 born 4/17/11
    DS2 born 2/22/13
    MMC 5/16/14@8w2d
    DD due 5/9/15 Please be our
    RAINBOW


    imageimage
  • I'm sorry for your loss. My brother also announced that he and is wife are pregnant shortly after my loss. It is definitely a tough position to be in. Welcome to the board.

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    BFP: 3/9/2014  EDD: 11/11/2014  MMC: 4/10/2014  D&C: 4/11/2014
  • Welcome to the board. You are entitled to your feelings.  Sorry about your loss.

    December 4                     image

    Married-1/2012
    TTC-8/2013   BFP-4/18/14  EDD: 12/29/12 MC-5/17/14 @ 7w4d
    BFP #2-11/13/14  EDD: 7/26/14  Beta #1: 11/14/13 (135 progesterone: 19.5)   Beta #2" 11/17/14 (733 ) 
    Hoping for good news!

    Everyone Welcome

  • Welcome to the board. I'm sorry for your loss. I honestly could have written this post. I've been feeling the very same way lately. I hope you are able to get through this. Please feel free to pm me if you need someone to talk to about it. (Hugs)
  • Thank you ladies for all the warm welcomes and kind words
    Pregnancy Ticker

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker


    BFP #1 12/23/13 MMC 01/24/14 @ 9w5days

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

     

  • qanda2013 said:

    Don't borrow trouble from tomorrow, try to have hope

    This makes so much sense. I always find myself fearing what if it happens again, what if I have a different miscarriage next time... But at the end of the day I have no way of knowing if anything will happen. Why spend my days being worried about something out of my control?

    I particularly like how you said it. I will try to remember it next time I get worried about tomorrow.

    image

    3rd pregnancy -- 1st baby -- praying for a rainbow

    #1 EDD 5/2014 -- MMC 10weeks ~~ #2 EDD 10/2014 -- Our baby girl, born sleeping 17weeks ~~ #3 EDD 8/2015

  • Welcome to the board! I'm so sorry for your loss. DH and I had a long talk about all the negative feelings we were having about trying and failing again, and realized as scared as we are, we're still 100% ready to get our hopes up again. Always chasing the rainbow!
  • I'm so sorry for your loss. I know exactly how you feel, as nobody except for the ladies on this board know that DH and I are TTC again. I hope that you find some support on this board, it's a great and safe place to express your thoughts and feelings on this crazy journey. 
  • So sorry for your loss. Welcome.
    TTCAL January Siggy Challenge: Animals in the Snow

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    About Me: 

    AMA 35 :  DH 33
    BFP#1 1/26/14 (EDD: 10/7/14).  MMC 3/10/14 D&C 3/14/14
    RE Consult 11/3/14 - AMH 2.25 "great" . FSH 7.10 . Low Vitamin D
    Myomectomy 12/17/14.  Benched until March.

    image

    My Ovulation Chart
  • I'm so sorry for your loss. I know how you feel. My stepsister just told me she is pregnant with her second. It's hard to deal with the mixed emotions of wanting to be supportive and happy for someone, but dealing with the hurt that it causes you at the same time. Just know that it is completly normal to feel this way. ((HUGS))

    Me: 34; DH: 38; SD: 9
    TTC #1 since November 2013

    BFP #1: 2/4/14--EDD 10/14/14--CP 2/8/14

    BFP #2: 3/1/14--EDD 11/15/14--MMC at 12w6d (baby stopped developing at 11w4d)
    D&C 5/13/14; Retained Tissue Found: Cytotec 5/30/14; 2nd D&C 6/20/14

    BFP #3: 12/13/14--EDD 8/27/15--MMC at 7 weeks (no fetal pole and measuring 1 1/2 weeks behind)--Cytotec 1/9/15

    January 2015: Off to RE for RPL testing

      Image and video hosting by TinyPicAugust 4

     

  • So sorry for your loss. ::hugs::   I know the feeling, after I had my loss it seems like everyone i know, family and friends, are getting pg. It's hard to be happy for them, but you are not being selfish. What happened is a very difficult thing and it is only natural to feel the way you do. Also, it is natural to have fears about it happening again. I think that is only normal after having this experience. Just remember that what has already happened does not determine what will happen next time. (hard I know I have to remind myself this daily.) I hope you find the support you need here, and that your stay is short and sweet. 
    -Megan


    Started dating Hubby May 17 2005. Married since Aug 20 2011 
    Me:30   Hubby:31
    TTC since May 2012 
    HSG Dec 2012 Fill no spill on left side, right side normal (most physically painful experience of my life..)
    Metformin Started May 2013
    PG#1: BFP 10-21-13. EDD 6-17-14 mmc 12-9-13 m/c occurred with cytotec on 12-11-13 
    PG#2: BFP 07-25-14.  EDD 4-5-15   *Hoping this is my rainbow*
    Diagnosed with PCOS, Hypothyroid,IBD/UC, (UC in remission as of July 2014)
    *I will always love you Fetey the first.* 
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    ALL WELCOME!



  • sfazarsfazar member

    Welcome, and I'm so sorry for your loss. I've been hanging out here, too, for a while silently. I'm glad we're becoming active members!

     

    I totally feel for you with all of your friends and family announcing pregnancies--I've been through the same thing. I feel like shouting "Can I get a little sensitivity here, please?!"  As the other ladies said, your emotions are totally normal and valid, so just do what feels right to you, whether it's not replying or deleting from your inbox etc. In terms of future pregnancy fears, I really found it helpful to lurk on the PGAL board for how those ladies are coping. They have a lot of good ideas, and it makes me feel more brave!

    Me (34); DH (35)

    BFP 11/25/13; Heard strong heartbeats for 3 weeks; Natural MC (1/15/14)

    BFP 11/11/14 EDD 07/21/15 hoping for our rainbow!

    Pregnancy Ticker
  • Hi and welcome. I agree, try not to feel guilty. I think your feelings are very valid.

    (As a side note, it seems we m/c on the same day in January. I was 10 weeks.)

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    BabyFruit Ticker
    mmc and d&c at 8.5 weeks - 8/23/2010
    natural m/c and d&c at 10 weeks - 1/24/2014
    DX w/ hetero C677t and A1298C MTHFR - 3/4/2014

  • alm288alm288 member
    I'm so sorry for your loss. I also have a hard time when people tell me they are expecting. Take it easy on yourself - your feelings are normal. I hope you find the support you are looking for here. Welcome.
    TTC: Since July 2013
    BFP #1: EDD 05/27/2014 (D&C 10/17/2014)
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