December 2014 Moms

You couldn't wait a little?

So, we fb announced on Saturday. Lots of positive responses, et cetera. Later that night, I see a post from a cousin that I accepted the friend request just to be nice. Well, it's a pic of 2 pee sticks saying Pregnant. Reading the comments, I discover that she hasn't even been to the doctor yet and says she guesses she is 5 weeks. What?!? Today , she posted that her due date is March 1. Just crazy to me to be posting that early. And, I can't help but feel like she posted on Saturday, bc I posted I was preg. Not a big deal, but I was just shocked that the sperm had barely made it to the egg and she is telling the world.

Re: You couldn't wait a little?

  • So, we fb announced on Saturday. Lots of positive responses, et cetera. Later that night, I see a post from a cousin that I accepted the friend request just to be nice. Well, it's a pic of 2 pee sticks saying Pregnant. Reading the comments, I discover that she hasn't even been to the doctor yet and says she guesses she is 5 weeks. What?!? Today , she posted that her due date is March 1. Just crazy to me to be posting that early. And, I can't help but feel like she posted on Saturday, bc I posted I was preg. Not a big deal, but I was just shocked that the sperm had barely made it to the egg and she is telling the world.
    Everyone has different levels of comfort on when they want to announce.  Sorry that you feel she stole your thunder.  


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  • That sucks. I'm sorry.
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  • I have a FB friends who did the same. I waited to post till I was in my second trimester. She comes out and says she just found out she's expecting. She's super early.
    We don't have a lot of the same friends so she didn't steal my thunder. I just hope for her sake everything goes well.

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  • I announced at 4.5 weeks oops
  • I agree. BUT at the same time why should someone conceal their excitement and something special to them because their cousin is experiencing the same thing. Not trying to argue but more give some insight because you should be basking in your awesome news and not some pee stick picture. I'm sure your family will appreciate your proper etiquette. (A pee stick picture is gross in my opinion, no offense to others but really it's something you peed on)
  • I am 15 weeks and still haven't done a FB announcement. But that's just me. I'm still nervous AL last time...
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  • Meh. I certainly wouldn't announce that early on FB, but it's her decision when and how she announces. I wouldn't let it get to me.
  • I announced two days after I got my BFP with my second. It was mostly because I wasn't married and my MIL told my H that we couldn't announce yet because she was so embarrassed that we were having a second kid out of wedlock lol.

    I agree with the others, there is no right time to announce. It's whenever they feel comfortable. I get why you are upset, but logically it doesn't make sense. Sorry. Finding out that you are pregnant is a huge deal so I doubt she even thought of till afterwards and I am sure she wasn't trying to steal your thunder. Now if she was at your baby shower or a special event for you and announced that is a different story.

    Like I said. I get it. I would probably be like wtf as well but definitely don't let her get to you.
    Wife. Boy mom x6. Expecting #7. Wannabe homesteader.
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  • Everyone is different... but it makes me nervous for those who announce super early!  A FB friend / acquaintance of mine just announced she is pregnant with her second child as soon as the pee sticks dried.  I am happy for her, but pray for her that all goes well.  I have seen at least 4 examples of people who announce early and then post something about miscarrying a few weeks later.
    BFP on 4.3.2014
    EDD 12.10.2014
    DS #1 born 12.16.2014 - He's perfect!

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  • I really am not that bothered by it. Our family dynamic adds to my "really?" more than if it was someone else. I'm not judging anyone on when they announce. Since I have gone through years of fertility junk, I was just personally nervous to post early since my body doesn't seem to like babies. I am happy for her. If you knew the family, I would have sounded like less of a baby! :)
  • My sister in law was like that, picture of the pee stick and everything. It did bother me a bit, but she has no filter, lol. So, I say maybe secretly think she's cray cray but don't take it too personally. To each their own I guess
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  • That's all personal preference. This is sad, and I'm not trying to be insensitive, but I had a friend who posted fairly early about her pregnancy, then she miscarried and had to announce that to the FB world also. I would personally not want to go through that, so I waited until second tri to make it public.

    DS1: 12/17/2014
    DS2: born sleeping at 26 weeks on 8/8/2016 due to chromosomal deletion
    Pregnant with baby 3 -  EDD 9/14/2017

  • I cant tell you how many people announced they were pregnant after I made my fb announcement. Like, at least 3 of my friends..... within the same week. Right now theres 7 people who i know are expecting. Take it for what it is, baby fever is in full fledge. People are having babies and announcing it left and right.
  • I'm not saying I agree with your cousin's announcement...but I have a couple of friends who announce publicly the minute they get a positive pregnancy test. They are both of the mindset that they are pregnant today and want to celebrate, and if something bad were to happen, they'd want the support of their friends and family. It sounds naive, but one of them has actually lost a baby at 22 weeks when it was discovered he had a tumor and was not developing properly...so she knows about loss and needing support. To each their own.
    Jimmie, mama to Zoey (March 2011)
    Losses 5/13, 8/13, and 3/14. 
    Expecting another GIRL! Carter Grace due on 12/25.

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  • Yea, I tend to cringe when I see super early announcement posts just because I'm paranoid about miscarriages and the general risks in early pregnancy. We've had several friends who have had early miscarriages, and the ones who had already announced faced some really upsetting social hardships in having to untell people one by one (unfortunately people's responses are not always sensitive, eg "well you can always try again!"). That said, when I see an early post, I just hold my breath for that couple and really hope it works out better for them. 

    I think your cousin was excited about her news and might not have considered the risks in an early announcement. I don't think I'd necessarily see the post as trying to steal my thunder in some way (I rarely, if ever, credit anyone's facebook behavior as a direct result of my own), and even if it is, who cares?! You've certainly got friends and family that are unique from your cousin's. You've still got plenty of thunder in your announcement. 

    I'd shrug it off and pray for the best results for your cousin. It breaks my heart to see people go through the "untelling" process or the fade-away-and-hope-nobody-asks process. 
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  • I had a friend that did exactly this the same day that I posted my announcement. It bothered me that she was posting at 5 weeks, and that she had to do it the same day I did. But, to each their own.
  • We were so excited with out first that we announced almost right away. This one, we waited till about 8-9 weeks (which is still considered early to a lot of you). But you know, it's all in what makes them comfortable. She was probably excited that she heard about you announcement and thought that it was fun that you both were pregnant and announced around the same time. I could see how she would want to do that out of excitement, not to intentionally steal your thunder.
    Mommy to Emery Vera 5.20.12  Blog
  • I announced at 8 weeks after seeing th hb on the us.
  • With my first I guess I was a little quick on the trigger and announced at like 5 weeks. This time we waited until 13 or 14. I guess bc I know a little more now about the process and the possibilities of what could happen.
    As far as your cousin goes, I agree with OP. She's probably just the type if person who doesn't like to be in the shadows so decided to announce for some attention or could just be really excited. I wouldn't look too much into it.

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  • I would feel the same way you do.  I don't necessarily care that she announced it early...but I would hate knowing that you just announced this far along and she announces as the pee stick dries.  You never know if she announced it because you did or not, but I'd be like you and that would be at the back of my mind.
                                                    


                                                          

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  • Meh, to each their own. Some of my friends announce super early, others wait until second tri like I did. The ones that announce early are also the ones that would want/welcome the support of all of their friends and family should something go wrong. 

    I never got the whole "stealing thunder" thing personally, I think it's just more to be excited about, but sorry you are disappointed. 
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  • At least let the piss dry!
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  • Ehh.. I'd never post that early, but I've seen quite a few facebook announcements where the stick is literally still wet. Not my cup of tea, but it just doesn't phase some people.

    You can't really be upset with someone that's excited to announce though, even if it's right after you announce. People aren't going to forget that you're pregnant. If anything, I'd think most families would be excited to find out that TWO new babies were on their way.

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  • JCM285JCM285 member
    I haven't actually seen any pregnancy announcements with the pee stick although one of my friends announced on FB at like 5w without a pee stick. Anybody who announces that early makes me feel a bit nervous because I had 2 first tri losses but I don't expect everyone to feel the same anxiety. What is worse though is someone on FB actually posted her kids first poop. Like a picture of poop in a toilet. Completely unnecessary!! I think that is way crazier!!
    Married my best friend 7/2/11 - Furbaby born 7/9/11 and brought into our home 9/1/11

    BFP#1:   2/2/13 ~ exact m/c date unknown but around 3/20 at 10 weeks ~ diagnosed with PMP ~ D&C on 4/5 ~ TTA for at least 1 year due to PMP ~ cleared to TTC 1/14

    BFP#2:   2/7/14 ~ m/c 2/20/14 ~ possibly due to chemical pregnancy ~ TG no D&C is needed 

    Surprise BFP#3:  4/4/14 ~ super duper extra happy (and nervous) about this one - EDD 12/9/14!!!

    John Joseph was born on 12/12/14 at 7 lbs. 11 oz.  He is the most beautiful rainbow baby we could have wished for!


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  • THUNDER STEALER. If she wants to announce early, fine. Her timing sucked.
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  • I'm sorry that does seem a little rude to post that and with out dr conformation.
  • JCM285JCM285 member
    edited July 2014
    @katehgee‌, that is even worse! What are these people thinking??
    Married my best friend 7/2/11 - Furbaby born 7/9/11 and brought into our home 9/1/11

    BFP#1:   2/2/13 ~ exact m/c date unknown but around 3/20 at 10 weeks ~ diagnosed with PMP ~ D&C on 4/5 ~ TTA for at least 1 year due to PMP ~ cleared to TTC 1/14

    BFP#2:   2/7/14 ~ m/c 2/20/14 ~ possibly due to chemical pregnancy ~ TG no D&C is needed 

    Surprise BFP#3:  4/4/14 ~ super duper extra happy (and nervous) about this one - EDD 12/9/14!!!

    John Joseph was born on 12/12/14 at 7 lbs. 11 oz.  He is the most beautiful rainbow baby we could have wished for!


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  • Same thing happened to me, she is due or thinks she is due February , Saturday at a party someone had bought her a brand new diaper bag! I hope all goes well for her but seriously?
  • One of my good friends announced super early with a picture of the pee stick too. Sadly she lost the baby :( The second time she got pregnant she waited a really long time to announce publicly. It's hard to know when is the "right" time, you have to just go with what you're comfortable with. We haven't announced publicly yet and I haven't even told my job. I'm nervous AL. Sorry about your cousin announcing so soon after you.
  • I try not to let Facebook ruffle my feathers anymore! To each their own!
  • edited July 2014
    We told immediately, like 11 DPO.

    Why?

    Because we fought for this for 8 years. My FB is comprised of people I love. I had already been very open about my infertility with them, and they'd been very supportive, and I wanted to share it with the world.

    And that is my right to do so without being judged by people who have issues with my having a different comfort level than they do.

    If something HAD happened, they would still be the supportive awesome friends they have always been.


  • path75path75 member
    Unfortunately for me, my hubby posted our pregnancy on facebook at 5 weeks. He was so excited but I knew it wasn't the right time. At the moment I said go ahead and do it but told people not to post on my page. But the next two months were hell just thinking even more that I hope nothing happens. I am just now entering my 2nd trimester with a bit of relief that I can now post on my facebook. It is way to early to post because you just never know. 


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  • Mrw218Mrw218 member
    You never know but it is not too early. It is up to the comfort level of the person. Just bc you aren't comfortable with ppl on your Fb knowing doesn't mean others aren't. Also to op don't be that girl that has to be center of attention or the other person must have had some other motive than just being excited. She's allowed to be excited too regardless of how far along. You aren't the only person that is pregnant or going to get pregnant and while it is the center of your universe it isn't the center of everyone else's. I think it's lame that just bc she announced early you automatically jump to oh she's trying to steal my thunder. There are at least 5 Facebook friends of mine pregnant and at least 5 that just popped the kids out. If I announced my pregnancy which happened to be the same wknd as a bunch of them does that mean oh look I'm trying to steal their thunder. No bc guess what I have a lot of friends and family on Facebook that don't know any of these girls and I'm more concerned with announcing to them than overshadowing the 5 babies and 5 pregnancies. Just say congrats and move on.
  • My fiancé posted right after we got confirmation at a little over 7 weeks. I honestly didn't know (being a ftm and all) that people waited until 3 months to announce. Afterwards I had a lot of people telling me I should have waited but I really didn't know. I don't think people should be made to feel bad about when they announce, not everyone can conceive and every child is something to be excited about. Also, maybe she looks up to you and is excited to be pregnant at the same time you are? I doubt she did it to hinder your news.
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