Pre-TTC Cleanse/Detox/Body Prep

gutsymama · July 2014

Bear with me for a minute before pulling out the flamethrowers, ok? I'm not looking for a crazycakes juice fast or a colon cleanse

I suppose this is an intro of sorts - I was on here for a few months in 2012, but I've mostly just been on July 13 since then. My son was born with an abdominal wall defect that basically consumed our first year (details in my siggy and all over J13 if you're interested, I don't mind questions at all but I don't want to rehash everything in this OP). Even though I've been assured that nothing I did caused it, I have a looooooot of residual guilt about it, and I have spent a lot of time wracking my brain about what I could have done differently. I know most of it is irrational, but I can't get rid of the what-ifs.

We are planning to TTC again in a year, give or take, and I want to make sure my body is in the best possible shape to make a healthy baby. But if I don't define that a little better, I'm going to make myself crazy. So I guess I'm looking for legit resources about specific things to avoid or include in my diet and lifestyle beyond just general "eat healthy and exercise" advice - things that will prep my body, push out toxins, promote healthy eggs and/or ute, anything; and/or studies (if there are any, I know that's tricky with pregnancy-related things) proving that certain things are absolutely not going to make a difference (maybe I shouldn't have rested my laptop on my belly so much? maybe I shouldn't have had that beer during the 2ww? I know these are silly, but I can't help it sometimes). Even if it's something that probably won't make a difference, but it might - I need to know I'm doing everything I can, but weed out the things that I don't need to worry about, for my sanity's sake.

Google tends to multiply my anxiety, so I thought I'd ask the experts. TIA.

chaysefaith · July 2014

Have you fed your H sperm friendly trail mix?

gutsymama · July 2014

SNLT1012 said:

Have you fed your H sperm friendly trail mix?

I have not. Do you have a recipe? I'm assuming it would involve lots of nuts ;;)

chaysefaith · July 2014

mimi4347 said:

SNLT1012 said:

Have you fed your H sperm friendly trail mix?

I have not. Do you have a recipe? I'm assuming it would involve lots of nuts ;;)

----quote fail----

OMG funniest fucking thing I've read all day.

Apparently it's walnuts, banana chips and m&m's. Who knew.

gutsymama · July 2014

bibliothecary said:

SNLT1012 said:

Have you fed your H sperm friendly trail mix?

I like you, you cheeky devil.

I'm going to attempt to post without snark or gifs.. This is not my normal state. I may strain something.

OP, as long as you're maintaining a healthy weight, exercising some, and your doctor is happy, there isn't a need to flush "toxins" out of your body. You're overthinking this. Eat food. Not too much. Mostly plants. And calm y'self. You'll be fine.

@bibliothecary I know this. I guess this is my attempt to be able to stop overthinking it - I can give myself a few things to focus on and try to let go of the rest.

urani · July 2014

mimi4347 said:

Bear with me for a minute before pulling out the flamethrowers, ok? I'm not looking for a crazycakes juice fast or a colon cleanse

I suppose this is an intro of sorts - I was on here for a few months in 2012, but I've mostly just been on July 13 since then. My son was born with an abdominal wall defect that basically consumed our first year (details in my siggy and all over J13 if you're interested, I don't mind questions at all but I don't want to rehash everything in this OP). Even though I've been assured that nothing I did caused it, I have a looooooot of residual guilt about it, and I have spent a lot of time wracking my brain about what I could have done differently. I know most of it is irrational, but I can't get rid of the what-ifs.

We are planning to TTC again in a year, give or take, and I want to make sure my body is in the best possible shape to make a healthy baby. But if I don't define that a little better, I'm going to make myself crazy. So I guess I'm looking for legit resources about specific things to avoid or include in my diet and lifestyle beyond just general "eat healthy and exercise" advice - things that will prep my body, push out toxins, promote healthy eggs and/or ute, anything; and/or studies (if there are any, I know that's tricky with pregnancy-related things) proving that certain things are absolutely not going to make a difference (maybe I shouldn't have rested my laptop on my belly so much? maybe I shouldn't have had that beer during the 2ww? I know these are silly, but I can't help it sometimes). Even if it's something that probably won't make a difference, but it might - I need to know I'm doing everything I can, but weed out the things that I don't need to worry about, for my sanity's sake.

Google tends to multiply my anxiety, so I thought I'd ask the experts. TIA.

I'm sorry to hear about your son's troubles.

Cleanses and flushing out 'toxins' is bullshit. Like PP said- eat healthy, exercise, take care of yourself.

chaysefaith · July 2014

On a serious note, OP, I am sorry for your sons troubles. There really is nothing you could have done differently, try not to stress about it next time. I know that's easier said than done but I promise you drinking a beer during the 2WW, eating a cold deli sandwich, or wearing pants that were too tight did not cause your sons problems. Good luck to you in TTC again.

BillyHorrible · July 2014

I'm less concerned with your physical health, and more concerned with your mental health. I don't mean to sound flippant, but have you/are you talking to anyone about your guilt? I think it's a perfectly natural response, and one than many mothers go through when "something goes wrong" whether that be a miscarriage, a birth defect, or even a situational harm like an accident on a playground. But when it starts affecting aspects of your life, then it can become unhealthy. In your specific situation, it could become something that haunts you all through TTC, but also through your pregnancy, and potentially your child's life as you wait for the other shoe to drop, making you unable to enjoy the positive aspects of those times. It's all well and good to eat healthy and maintain your fitness, but make sure you're taking care of you too.

gutsymama · July 2014

BillyHorrible said:

I'm less concerned with your physical health, and more concerned with your mental health. I don't mean to sound flippant, but have you/are you talking to anyone about your guilt? I think it's a perfectly natural response, and one than many mothers go through when "something goes wrong" whether that be a miscarriage, a birth defect, or even a situational harm like an accident on a playground. But when it starts affecting aspects of your life, then it can become unhealthy. In your specific situation, it could become something that haunts you all through TTC, but also through your pregnancy, and potentially your child's life as you wait for the other shoe to drop, making you unable to enjoy the positive aspects of those times. It's all well and good to eat healthy and maintain your fitness, but make sure you're taking care of you too.

@BillyHorrible I tried. It took me a long time to finally go, and then the person I saw was kind of terrible and after 4 sessions, when I told her my son was doing much better, she basically told me I must not need her anymore since he was healthier and I wouldn't have cause for anxiety anymore. Sigh. I haven't mustered up to try to find someone else since then - I'm planning to talk to my OB about it at my yearly in a few weeks.

MarathonHiker · July 2014

I'm so sorry for your sons health issues- I imagine until someone is there, it's easy for us to say "get over it" or "there's nothing you can do" or "you did nothing wrong" ... even if you know, in your heart, that's true.

Just please don't do any weird cleanses or detoxes ::puts dietician hat on:: they're really not good for much of anything. Eating your fruits, veggies, lean proteins and taking a prenatal is a great start and will do SO much for your own health than anything else.

gutsymama · July 2014

@MarathonHiker‌ Don't worry - I like food too much to stick with a juice fast for longer than about 3 hours

gutsymama · July 2014

@etoille sorry to disappoint - we're looking at several months from now, probably next summer. I need to be securely in a grown up job and ideally moved and dissertated before we get down to business again. I just want plenty of time to get my ass in shape

gutsymama · July 2014

etoille said:
also you may want to send @lancomechica a PM to ask her opinion

Truth. I just feel bad asking J13ers to work on TB!

BillyHorrible · July 2014

mimi4347 said:

@BillyHorrible I tried. It took me a long time to finally go, and then the person I saw was kind of terrible and after 4 sessions, when I told her my son was doing much better, she basically told me I must not need her anymore since he was healthier and I wouldn't have cause for anxiety anymore. Sigh. I haven't mustered up to try to find someone else since then - I'm planning to talk to my OB about it at my yearly in a few weeks.

:-(

I do agree with Joy though - one bad experience is just that, one bad experience. I've personally found that with therapy it can be hit or miss. Unfortunately it's a real trial and error kind of experience. My first therapist I ever went to, I pretty much just slept through the whole thing and she claimed that was great, because it meant I was de-stressing and relaxing. :-/ It took a while to find one that was a good fit for me. The person you spoke with doesn't sound very intuitive. I have exactly 0 years of training in any mental health specialties and even I can see that your anxiety isn't going to abate just because your son is doing better!

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