so frustrated

KyMommy86 · June 2014

Been TTC for a while now and I've reached a point where it feels like it's never going to happen. What do you all do when you get frustrated?

chaysefaith · June 2014

There's not really anything I do when I get frustrated other than suck it up and deal with it. It is what it is and I can't change the fact that I'm not pregnant.

How long have you been trying? I see you already have 2, are you tracking your BBT?

Cythe · June 2014

I understand this frustration, especially today, I do. I'm feeling ever confident that this cycle is a bust, however what I do when I'm feeling down or frustrated is 1) have a drink or eat a pint of ice cream and 2) suck it up. I really don't mean to be harsh, but its what works for me. I'm not pregnant this cycle? Nothing I can do about it 10 days past O. Focus on the good things in your life and look at next cycle.

ETA: sorry for your loss

KyMommy86 · June 2014

Been trying for close to a year. I was preg but miscarried and started trying again soon after.
What's getting me most is that my other 2 were not planned and it seemed like there was no trouble (with my first I was taking BC and with my 2nd the BC I was on had a recall) and now that there's one we're planning it seems like it's taking forever. Maybe it's just cause we know that we want to be preg so the wait it just seeming long.
Yeah I'm tracking.

pippacricket · June 2014

fuzzylogic said:

I do something that has nothing to do with TTC. I dive into work, I garden, I hang out with friends. Frankly, I've been at this for quite some time and I've stopped getting all that frustrated.

Ditto this. I try to find home improvement projects to work. Most recently, DH and I put up some crown molding and repainted an ugly vanity. It definitely helps keep my mind busy.

KyMommy86 · June 2014

I think I may need to break out my French horn and start practicing hardcore again

KyMommy86 · June 2014

Yeah sorry. I chart my temps. Tracking my period is next to useless for me as I'm pretty irregular. It's been almost 2 months since my last period...

KyMommy86 · June 2014

I have those over the counter ovulation tests too that I use.

EDIT: Up until recently that is. The past few months my husband and I have decided that we are going to do the sex every other day thing and maybe relax a little and stop trying to track everything.

lizzyp9112 · June 2014

I'm sorry you are frustrated, but your recent post on another board says you had a miscarriage when you were 10 weeks along. That post is from June 12 (see here: https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12366213/was-10-weeks-now-i-m-not#latest)

If you just had a miscarriage, it will take time for your body to readjust so you can begin TTC again. I know you said you went right back into TTC after the miscarriage but that was only 2 1/2 weeks ago. You may need more time before your body is ready.

KyMommy86 · June 2014

lizzyp9112 said:

I'm sorry you are frustrated, but your recent post on another board says you had a miscarriage when you were 10 weeks along. That post is from June 12 (see here: https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12366213/was-10-weeks-now-i-m-not#latest)

If you just had a miscarriage, it will take time for your body to readjust so you can begin TTC again. I know you said you went right back into TTC after the miscarriage but that was only 2 1/2 weeks ago. You may need more time before your body is ready.

Yeah I know. It took almost a year to get that one and then to have it end like that. I was so excited and then it was gone.

divinemsbee · June 2014

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I think around the year mark I was definitely at peak frustration level (I'd had two losses at that point). It was a constant low to medium level of frustration and not a little bit of sadness that was pretty constant. I would try to throw myself into things that weren't TTC related and fortunately for me that was right around Christmas so I Martha Stewart-ed that up.

It's better now. I get hours, maybe a day here or there of frustration, generally when I'm waiting for results on things and am not getting them, but I'm a lot more able to detach. Honestly, I don't wish for anyone to end up at this level like I have, but this is what works for me now.

chaysefaith · June 2014

KyMommy86 said:

Been trying for close to a year. I was preg but miscarried and started trying again soon after.
What's getting me most is that my other 2 were not planned and it seemed like there was no trouble (with my first I was taking BC and with my 2nd the BC I was on had a recall) and now that there's one we're planning it seems like it's taking forever. Maybe it's just cause we know that we want to be preg so the wait it just seeming long.
Yeah I'm tracking.

I COMPLETELY understand this frustration. My girls were born when I was 18 and 20...I was definitely not trying to get pregnant with them. I assumed getting pregnant when we were planning it would be a breeze as well. I did got KU right away when we started trying but, sadly, I lost him. I've been trying again for 3 months now and it is hard. I'm sorry you're so frustrated.

As far as your loss, that was just this past June 12? Or last year? I didn't follow the link. Has your doctor cleared you to start TTC again?

lizzyp9112 · June 2014

@SNLT1012, the post the OP made was from June 12 of this year, so just 2 1/2 weeks ago.

lizzyp9112 · June 2014

Whitney101411 said:

So the post from May 19th when you got a positive HPT then started your period was not actually your period? I'm just trying to figure this all out, as I don't see an update of what you thought was a CP.

May 19: https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12346607/am-i-still-pregnant#latest

June 12: https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12366213/was-10-weeks-now-i-m-not#latest

I feel the same way. Something is not adding up and I have no idea what it is.

chaysefaith · June 2014

Meh. I bled for 5 weeks before I lost my pregnancy. It can happen.

chaysefaith · June 2014

WhoCanItBeNow said:

SNLT1012 said:

Meh. I bled for 5 weeks before I lost my pregnancy. It can happen.

World of difference between a CP at 4-5 weeks and PTL at 19 weeks.

Agreed. I haven't followed any of the links but assumed based on just what I've read here that she didn't have CP and her pregnancy continued to 10 weeks. I was thinking an SCH could have been at play.

KyMommy86 · June 2014

SNLT1012 said:

KyMommy86 said:

Been trying for close to a year. I was preg but miscarried and started trying again soon after.
What's getting me most is that my other 2 were not planned and it seemed like there was no trouble (with my first I was taking BC and with my 2nd the BC I was on had a recall) and now that there's one we're planning it seems like it's taking forever. Maybe it's just cause we know that we want to be preg so the wait it just seeming long.
Yeah I'm tracking.

I COMPLETELY understand this frustration. My girls were born when I was 18 and 20...I was definitely not trying to get pregnant with them. I assumed getting pregnant when we were planning it would be a breeze as well. I did got KU right away when we started trying but, sadly, I lost him. I've been trying again for 3 months now and it is hard. I'm sorry you're so frustrated.

As far as your loss, that was just this past June 12? Or last year? I didn't follow the link. Has your doctor cleared you to start TTC again?

Just this past June. Yeah I've been cleared. Just recently (like 4 days ago). The lack of updates was cause I thought no one really cared and didn't want to push my life on other people.
Been in and out of the dr since all the bleeding started....

KyMommy86 · June 2014

SNLT1012 said:

WhoCanItBeNow said:

SNLT1012 said:

Meh. I bled for 5 weeks before I lost my pregnancy. It can happen.

World of difference between a CP at 4-5 weeks and PTL at 19 weeks.

Agreed. I haven't followed any of the links but assumed based on just what I've read here that she didn't have CP and her pregnancy continued to 10 weeks. I was thinking an SCH could have been at play.

My pregnancy did continue to 10 weeks. There was some thought it may have been a CP but that was not the case I guess.

EDIT: My dr never said CP that was just what some other posters were guessing before I actually went to the dr.

KyMommy86 · June 2014

I thought it seemed quick too (and honestly have only had sex twice since the MC) but my dr seemed to think it was fine.
I have been looking for a new dr for other reasons so maybe if I get a 2nd opinion that would be a different story.

myatala · June 2014

I lost my first pregnancy at ~12wks. I would have waited at least 1 cycle to give my body some time to heal but I waited a few months because emotionally I needed more time. Only you can know how soon you feel emotionally ready to resume TTC but if I were to have another 1st tri loss I would probably give myself at least 1 cycle for physical healing (longer if my OB advised a longer break).

Ladymouse · June 2014

I buy and down a bottle of cheap strawberry-flavored wine.

I also make stuff for people. Like a quilt for my photographer cousin (a newborn quilt - really?) Or baby girl clothes out of fat quarters (no no no no NO! Stop with the baby stuff!) Or make another stab at re-writing my first novel (I hate that thing by now. "But it could be really good with just the first three chapters redone!" Oh hush, it just sucks.) Or attempts at making my psychotic sewing machine work (my mom thought I was being overly dramatic, until she had to switch projects on it. Then SHE spent the five hours fighting the cursed thing and trying to undo the damage - for what should've been a half hour project. She finally understands why I prefer sewing by hand.)

so frustrated

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