August 2014 Moms

Work and Stress-Anxiety

Hey ladies,

It has been a while!! I hope everyone is doing fine. Last week I told my OB that I had been expierencing bad anxiety attacks at work. My job has become so stressful that I have had faint spells, hours through out the day trying to catch my breath, and shakiness. I have never been this stressed in my life. Of course, The first question she asked was if I was stressing about the baby coming. That seems to be what everyone thinks these days... If you are pregnant and stressed its probably about the baby...

I polietly told her no... I wish I had time to stress about the baby, every moment I spend stressing is about all the drama and build up that the person I replaced has left me. I was suppose to be able to enjoy this part of pregnancy and go to babys r us and carters and feel happy that he will be here in a month and I can't I spend most of my day breathing in a paper bag trying to calm down.

She continues to tell me that she can give me medication but it may harm the baby. He may be addicted to toxins and blah blah blah... now does that sound like something I would want to do to my son. I mean I get that doctors can't fix everything but there has to be something I can do. I have tried meditation, yoga, oils, herbs.... teas(not to mention there are not many that we can safely consume while pregnant that can help with anxiety) I just dont know what to do any more. I wish I could just have a  week of no work, no ringing phones, no bitching co-workers, no nothing. To top it all off the hub and I are still living seperately until his orders come through to move so I am just doing this all alone.

Please tell me one of you have the CURE!!! lol I mean there has to be something right??

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Re: Work and Stress-Anxiety

  • It seems like you're trying anything I could suggest. I don't have any advice but I'm so sorry you are this stressed. Can you talk to someone at work about getting some help? I hope it works out some how.
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  • When I was TTC I tried acupuncture and one of the benefits I wasn't expecting was lowering of work-related stress. Maybe something to look into as I have heard many women who get pregnant keep going.  I stopped going once my fertility issues were determined to be too much for acupuncture to help with! But I do miss it for the stress relief benefits. 
  • I agree with @Yoginikiki that maybe you could work on gaining some perspective that could help you let go of all the stress you're internalizing. Does your work put people's lives on the line? If you dropped absolutely everything, what's the worst that could happen?

    I hope it gets better, I really do. I would keep doing what you're doing -- take breaks to go for a walk outside, go to a yoga class, drink a cup of tea, and above all remember these people and their problems aren't really that important in the greater scheme of things.
  • con07scon07s member
    Holy smokes I can totally relate to this situation!!!!! I also wish I had more time to stress about baby things but work is soaking up all my energy and by the time I'm home I just want to vent. I came into a manager position after the place had no manager for several months. Staff members bitching, upper management doesn't consider the fact that I'm pregnant so I get treated like a work horse. I really hope you can find some time away from work before baby to relax. My goal is to have at least 2 weeks off before my due date to have an early leave just so I can prepare and collect my sanity back. Take it easy momma! :)
  • sekurasekura member
    shevaCC is right--work is not that important, unless you are doing life-saving work.  I was a police dispatcher in college, and after that job, dealing with TRUE emergencies, I just laugh at all the made-up dramas of my jobs.  It just isn't that important in most cases--let it go.  Do not let it stress you out.
    And seriously consider looking for another job if this is a continuing issue.

    TTC #1 Since 8/2010
    Me: 34, DH: 35 DX: DOR (FSH 14.9, AMH 0.67, AFC ~10) and Egg Quality

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    "Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting the bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian." --Dennis Wholey

  • I am in a similar situation at work. I take a deep breathe and feel her, this makes me happy and guilty that I should be enjoying this moment more often. I was given a new position at work and they want me to complete so many things before I go on maternity leave. Thank god I am working from home next month. Whenever you get a free moment just feel your body. It is such a beautiful thing to be pregnant!!!
    You will be holding him in few weeks and your life will never be the same again. Put behind all the pity stuff at work.
  • It's the military and when we start sending people everywhere everything gets crazy in my job. It is funny because though national security is important.... what we are doing here is not that important. They make it seem like the world is going to end.... and I keep hearing "well your going to be gone for 42 days maternity leave so you need to do more" Im already doing more. lol You ladies are right though... @sekura, I never looked at it that way before. You are right NO ONE IS DYING. These are things that if I drop, yes I get chewed out and written up but at the end of the day im getting out soon, and I want to be able to look back and enjoy the fact that I am becoming a mother. Some people can't even become parents on their own, and I am consuming the entire pregnancy devoted to work and not my baby. I can't make this memory all over again, might as well give them the finger and play the pregnant lady card lol.

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  • My best friend used to be an executive at Target and would get so stressed out with work.  She would tell me her boss had a good perspective on work and used to tell her "we sell pants", not to trivialize their job, but to keep it in perspective, that at the end of the day, no one was dying.  It was always strange, because at the time, I was an ICU oncology nurse, so people were in fact dying.  And I was stressed, but went home thankful and she went home frazzled ...not b/c she is a more stressful person, but really because her employees, bosses, and others in her job put more stress on her.  They all acted like it was the end of the world if something wasn't done.  Where as those in jobs where it really is life and death, tend to have more perspective... (at least in my experience).  So I believe that the pressure they are putting on you is real, regardless of whether the job is life and death, but at the end of the day, you can't change their attitude, so you just have to adjust yours and remember, that at the end of the day, you are alive, are going to have a baby and an exciting new chapter your life, and a job is only a job.  
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  • PeedyPeedy member
    My job was incredibly stressful 3 months ago. I spoke to my boss and bosses boss and let them know that I was dissatisfied for a number of reasons. (Mainly I just wasn't willing to work feeling like this all the time). Boss' boss said give it month and they'll fix it.. And they really made a number of changes that put the proper organizational structure and procedures in place to allow me to pushback in a way that is well received. Good luck!
  • wow @peedy thats really good. Now other women can not deal with this same issue thats great.

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  • Things are still crazy. I took a more natural approach started using rescue remedy that my doula recommended. I pretty much said eff it. lol it woulds bad but this week was a lot easier when I put work to the side. Now I have gotten yelled at for it and blamed for several things but I think I'm so caught up in smelling the smell of lavender oil in my office I kind of just blow to off. Regardless of what my co-workers say, I am for the first time during the pregnancy... THE PREGNANT woman lol. I had to give it up after finding out I would be induced. I was running out of time and needed to make a change. This weekend they needed me to work, and I told them I was going to the hospital due to contractions lol there is no way I was working 14 days straight this week. So with that being said, it is a struggle but kind of being a bitch about work has been working best... As soon as they noticed my change of attitude they kind of just talk mess about me being lazy.... but u know what after 8 years of busting my butt.... I deserve one month of relaxing in the hardest time during pregnancy. I put in a request for leave for two weeks to take the edge off so hoping they approve. thanks ladies!!!

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