And at 37w 5d I'm officially scared

melissaquinn106 · June 2014

I knew this day would eventually come. I talk a big game about how I have a high tolerance for pain and how I'm an athlete so labor will be fine no matter what, and I know I believe it still, but I just took the tour of the hospital and I can honestly say I'm officially scared.

I'm scared for the actual labor. I'm scared for being alone in the hospital after the baby is born and DH goes home for the night. I'm scared I'm going to fuck up breast feeding. I'm scared that I'm going to fuck up in general. And I can't stop crying. Oh hormones why must you betray me now!

The rational part of me knows these are all normal feelings and everything will be ok, but for these few moments I'm having a mini meltdown. Just needed get that all out there, deep breaths and I guess I'll watch my DVRd bachelorette and try and fall asleep. Hang in there ladies the end/beginning is near.

lowerygirl · June 2014

Hang in there, momma! You aren't alone in these feelings, trust me!

1982Babies · June 2014

Why isn't DH staying there with ya?

Nothing went the way I wanted it to. Sometimes ya just gotta go with the flow. We're still having issues with breastfeeding, but at least I have a pump (thanks, insurance!).

Whatever gets the baby out and you both end up happy and healthy! Until then, stuff your face with some delicious tacos and relax.

Nichole8787 · June 2014

I'm with you on being freaked out but everything really will be great. Just push those freaked out thoughts right out of your head! and I second the tacos comment!

email2ash · June 2014

I'm 38 weeks on Wed and nervous as well. But as my husband put it... It looks painful and scary but every mom is so happy as soon as that baby is in her arms! We can get through it and everything will be worth it

mustangholly · June 2014

You're not alone. I am scared too. Scared of the c - section recovery. Worried I won't be a good mother. Scared I can't protect the baby from all the bad in the world. It's not realistic but that's my feeling. It's all becoming very real and scary. Add hormones and it's makes all the feelings that much worse.

littlemissmarla · June 2014

I'm feeling the same, terrified of everything.. but i've come to the point that I need to do whatever I need to do to safely get my baby into this world and I will just have to deal with the pain, etc because in the end I get a squishy baby! Hang in there girl, we're almost done!

TricksyPixie · June 2014

I'm 38 weeks tomorrow, but I have my sweet little girl, and I'm telling you, these fears are NORMAL. I am STILL afraid of fucking up breastfeeding (and I have an awesome lactation consultant helping me, she is a boob MAGICIAN) and labor? I'm a warrior. But yes, it is intense. Can you do it? Definitely. And you WILL. And after it's all done, you hold the best prize you've ever won, and you realize just how strong you are. I get your fears. I am living em too. You're doing awesome, hang in there.

BBColt78 · June 2014

You can do it momma! Reality is just hitting, and that's ok. I'll keep hitting you like an evil stepmother for a few months. That's why you can come to places like this and see others are in the same position.

I agree with others... it sucks and it can be painful, but I kid you not.... on the way home from the hospital with DD #1 I asked my husband if it really hurt that bad and he laughed. I had forgotten already.

YOu got this!!!

honeybee434 · June 2014

I completely feel you! I had a complete meltdown today terrified of my upcoming c-section. I still am scared to
death but am trying to just think past it and realize how many people have been there and everything has worked out just fine!

Hope we all can calm our racing thoughts!

[Deleted User] · June 2014

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Shelleybell · June 2014

i promise no matter the pain and exhaustion you are going to look at your previous LO and feel like an absolute warrior knowing your body did that!!

You are not alone in your fear.

BP607 · June 2014

I think it's just the reality of a huge life change that you are freaking out about. It's totally normal. You will do fine having the baby, if you can't handle the pain, get an epidural, it's no big deal and I took a nap after I got mine with DS!! If breastfeeding doesn't work, you can always pump or FF, as long as your baby gets fed and is loved that's all that matters! Try not to put too much pressure on yourself!

arcangel333 · June 2014

I'm scared too. And constantly worried about being a fuck up, but I think these are all normal feelings. You're not alone :-) I just keep trying to picture how happy I will be once he is here and that seems to help. It will all be ok :-) this part is almost over!

SuperTinkerham · June 2014

I just told someone at work "I FEEL LIKE I AM STARING DOWN THE BARREL OF A GUN" so yah, I think the fear is normal (I hope so!)

tealowl · June 2014

Those feelings are totally normal! I've been having mini panic attacks at night where my heart starts racing and I feel sick to my stomach. I'm scared to go into labor. I was induced with DD, so it's the unknown that freaks me out. I don't know when it's going to happen.

Littlebean312 · June 2014

I have found that these affirmations have helped calm my nerves.

My body knows how to birth my baby just as it knew how to grow this baby.

The power and intensity of my contraction can not be stronger than me because it is me.

I just focus on knowing that soon my son will be in my arms and not in my tummy:)

bewilderingstar · June 2014

Once you go into labor, you'll hit this wave of calm. Your body will know what to do. Just listen to yourself and make sure to breathe through the contractions.

I thought I was going into labor a couple of weeks ago and all the fears I had melted away. It was really cool and now I have a new found calm about it all.

We are women - hear us ROAR! You can do this

argonne · June 2014

I'm freaking out and this is my second. Labor pain is bad, but it is pain with an end and a purpose. Breastfeeding can be hard, but it's not impossible (ETA: for a lot of women). You can do it.

The best advice I can give you is to just go with the flow. Stick to your plan, if you have one, but at the end of the day all that matters is healthy baby and healthy mom.

MstoMrstoMom851214 · June 2014

The hospital tour totally freaked me out too! We took it last week and I almost cried 3 separate times during it, and I'm not much of a crier. I keep telling myself that if all these other women can do it, so can I, but I'm still being a scared baby about it! I think I'm just going to try to focus on adjusting to life with a new baby, and just deal with the labor and delivery when it comes!

I haven't been posting much on here the past few weeks because some of the threads have been worsening my anxiety, but the birth announcements with the adorable pictures have been helping me get excited! We also got a 4D ultrasound, so looking at how cute he is already helps too!

Good luck, we can all do this!!

abunai523 · June 2014

gwennie357 said:

I was feeling just like that until a few days ago, when I finally turned the corner. It just sort of hit me that this kid is coming one way or another, and the pain and scariness and freaking out doesn't matter one bit to him. At some point, it'll be over, and I'll be holding him, and all the rest of it will be in the past. Doesn't mean I'm looking forward to the pain and awfulness, and I am REALLY looking forward to him. So for now, that's getting me through.

Hang in there. You're going to get through it, and on the other end the love of your life is waiting.

See, I have been feeling like this for most of the pregnancy, but now that it's getting close I keep getting these random spikes of fear. I wish they would go away, but it seems the tension is slowly building for me

blacktie3 · June 2014

I'm scared of the actual birth, and the time in the hospital in general...I hate them! For some reason I'm not nervous about bring LO home. Maybe its because I hate the hospital so much....or those fears will come when he is actually here?

Make DH stay in the hospital with you, it will help! I'm sure you will do just great!! You got this!!

shanaynerz · June 2014

You can do it! Labour is hard, but when you see your baby after, you seriously forget everything. I'm a huge wuss and have done it twice med-free before.

BFing didn't work for us. Do not put a crazy amount of pressure on you to EBF or anything. Do the best you can, but formula won't kill your baby.

And why is DH not staying over? My DH didn't leave at all really.

melissaquinn106 · June 2014

Thanks for all the support ladies. Felling better already. Turns out the hospital has a policy that DH can not stay past 10:30pm and can't arrive until 8am. Also, not sure if I mentioned this but regardless of when I deliver I'm not allowed any guests (not even my mom) unless it's 10:30am-12pm or 6:30pm - 8:00pm. This makes me sad because I at least want to see my mom when I'm all done.

But with all that said, I'll prob be tired and should rest so I can BF, and why force DH to stay on the uncomfortable chair when we live 5 min away. I'm sure it will all be fine, it just took me a little by surprise as I never really looked into those logistical things before just the other day.

I am trying to remind myself to just cherish the time with just LO and me as I have a very intrusive family and will probably have very little time alone with the baby once I get home. (At least in the beginning).

ADC1979 · June 2014

I was worried previously about the labor, but my HypnoBirthing class and affirmations have helped a lot with that. From time to time I still have a mini freak-out, but mostly I've come to terms with it.

Now, I can't begin to describe my terror about the postpartum recovery, worries about breastfeeding, and if I will ever sleep like a semi-normal human again. I had a meltdown Sunday morning because I was certain I'd never, ever sleep again. (I had a similar meltdown in May when I had a terrible sinus infection, but then my worry was I'd never be able to BREATHE again. Since I'm breathing now, that turned out to be something useless to meltdown about.)

Hormones are fun.

livkight · June 2014

I'm feeling pumped and actually really excited to do this labor and delivery thing! (Am I naive? Yes, absolutely, but I'm just riding these positive emotions for now. lol) BUT I'm terrified of the "after." Bringing her home, knowing that I'm (primarily) the one she will depend on.

My mom always told me that with me (her first baby) she was able to deal with recovering from a C section and finding out she was unable to breastfeed by remembering that, at the end of the day, having me and her alive was a success. She ultimately had 5 C sections and 5 FF babies, and she STILL remembers newborn days with fondness.

Everyone's journey will look different, and we're all going to struggle through different parts of this parenting thing, but as long as we keep the big picture in mind, everyone's LOs are going to be just fine.

[Deleted User] · June 2014

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TurtleMonsters · June 2014

What if you are in labor at 8:01 pm, will they kick him out? I can't believe they have that kind of policy!

You're going to have so many experienced medical people around, you don't even have to worry. many are parents themselves. I had LC's to talk to as well. Pretty much anything that came up the staff could solve.

Remembering that women choose to have more then one child, regardless of labor pain, put things into perspective for me. Then I just tried not to think of the possible scenarios beyond what I needed to write a birth plan.

melissaquinn106 · June 2014

I know I thought I must have heard them wrong. But I asked them more than once and they say the husbands "aren't invited" to stay overnight. I wonder if they just say that to cover their asses or they actually come around and kick out all the husbands. The shared rooms are seriously so tiny I can imagine it would be super uncomfortable for the DH's. And while I'm sure labor will be far more uncomfortable then sleeping on a chair, I'd rather have DH well rested and ready to help me out when he comes back. Don't get me wrong I hate the idea of him leaving me, and if by some miracle I get the one private room I'm sure he will stay. But I guess we will just have to wait and see what happens.

Sevilla · June 2014

Google 'natural birth stories' and read them to feel empowered and like you CAN do it. The biggest thing with labor is that if you get into the fear-tension-pain cycle then it will hurt and be much harder than if you can release into what your body is doing and let go into each contraction. IF you work with your body and avoid the fear/tension/pain cycle it will go much easier for you!

BBColt78 · June 2014

melissaquinn106 said:

I know I thought I must have heard them wrong. But I asked them more than once and they say the husbands "aren't invited" to stay overnight. I wonder if they just say that to cover their asses or they actually come around and kick out all the husbands. The shared rooms are seriously so tiny I can imagine it would be super uncomfortable for the DH's. And while I'm sure labor will be far more uncomfortable then sleeping on a chair, I'd rather have DH well rested and ready to help me out when he comes back. Don't get me wrong I hate the idea of him leaving me, and if by some miracle I get the one private room I'm sure he will stay. But I guess we will just have to wait and see what happens.

What hospital and where? I've never heard of this, ever. As PP said, normally that's for visitors and not "birth partners."

Prncesta · June 2014

I'm terrified as well. I just keep telling myself the end result will be worth all the pain and there's millions of women who do this all the time so we can do this!

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