I just wanted to share with you guys.
Today was my due date. It's amazing to me how much my life has changed in the 20 weeks since we lost Jonah. It's even more amazing to me how much a baby boy who I only ever held in my belly for a short 20 weeks was the cause of all the change.
Because of Jonah I have become a more compassionate person.
Because of Jonah I hold my girls a little tighter.
Because of Jonah I look at Shea and I know, now more than ever, that I can lean on him for ANYTHING and he will always be there to hold me up.
Because of Jonah I have become an advocate for pregnancy and infant loss, but also for babies born alive but fighting for their lives.
Because of Jonah I finally really, truly understood that EVERYONE is facing a battle in some way, and just because they may not talk to me about it doesn't mean they aren't hurting or struggling, and they deserve kindness and generosity from me all the time, not just when they are kind to me.
There are so many more ways that Jonah has changed my life, a lot of things are things that I obviously should have been doing all along, but sometimes we need a reminder to step back and reevaluate ourselves. It sucks hardcore that losing my son was my reminder, but his life meant something and I refuse to let it be forgotten.
/blog
Re: June 21, 2014
Jonah and you changed a lot of lives babe. He showed us how precious life is. You showed us how to be strong in the face of tragedy. Neither of you will be forgotten xo.
Oct 21/13. Beta 360 @ 16 dpo
Oct 23/13. Beta 749 @ 18 dpo
Nov 24/13. Saw HB (141bpm) & baby wiggle around via ultrasound @ 9w5d due date changed to June 23!!
Dec 6/13. Heard HB (122bpm) via Doppler at OB @ 11w3d
Jan 9/14. Heard HB (124bpm) via Doppler at OB @ 16w3d irregular beat
Jan 29/14. DH felt kicks for first time @ 19w3d
Feb 2/14. Saw baby via ultrasound (quick scan in ER) @ 19w6d
Feb 6/14. Heard HB (126-134bpm) via Doppler @ 20w3d normal beat
Feb 15/14. AS - baby looked great (measured 1w small) and would NOT let us see sex! @ 21w5d
Feb 20/14 3D US - its a GIRL!!!!! @ 22w3d
Feb 27/14. Repeat AS for more pics, HB 124bpm @ 23w3d
Mar 6/14. Heard HB (130bpm) via Doppler @ 24w3d
Married DH 7/30/11
CSC arrived 5/7/12
CHC arrived 6/2/14
Baby #1: expected June 2014
And today is a verry happy day in our house, which made yesterday easier to get through. My oldest baby turns 10 today!!!
#3 DD June 2014
CP December 2015
M/C 8/2016
Rainbow & Babe #4 EDD 7.28.18