- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
Multiples
Did you feel this way?
understand that its exciting to think of twins because it is unique in a way but I'm already scared to death. I mean I'm very happy about the babies on the way but I'm scared that I won't be able to carry them as long as they need to be in there and that when they come out, they will be anything less than perfect. DD already has two issues that I felt sort of guilty about even though I know I shouldn't. She has urinary reflux and a hole in her heart. Both are manageable and nothing to be too concerned about but I just think, is there anything else I could have done during my pregnancy to not make that happen? She was born at exactly 40 weeks.
Anyway, a "friend" of mine (really she's the wife of one of my husband's friends) sent me this link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qa09omtj1SY&feature=related and wrote, "are you ready for this?" And I'm so not! That is exactly what I'm afraid of! Those babies are so tiny and have to stay in incubators and they were so not ready to be born yet. It made me cry. I just want them to be healthy.
People don't seem to understand when they ask me "are you excited" why I also say "yes, but I'm also very nervous.".
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Did you feel this way?
while the chance of preterm is higher for twins- there are MANY many that are born close to 40w.
i think knowlege is power- have you read Dr. Luke's book? It's all about keeping the babies inside as long as possible. you can only do what you can do to help them- the rest is out of our hands - but i feel, for me, that knowing as much as i can know, and doing the best that I can only helps me and the babies.
Also remember- other people's problems are other people's problems- just b/c they happened to someone else does NOT mean they will happen to you.
You carried your DD to term- so there is no reason to think you won't carry these twins that long, too.
i didn't click on the video link- but your "friend" sounds like a real piece of work.
Do all that you can during your pregnancy to stay healthy...that's the most you can do...the rest is not up to us.
There are so many MOMs that carried their twins without a single problem and many whose babies didn't spend a day in NICU. You only hear about the ones who were born early and spent months/weeks in NICU or of the moms who had pregnancies riddled with complications.
I carried our twins to 37 weeks and didn't spend a day on bedrest. They were born just under 6 pounds and are super healthy...now weighing almost 10 pounds.
Stay positive...don't dwell on the "what ifs" and the negative stories. Even if twins are born early and spend time in NICU...they turn out just fine, too!
i carry your heart with me(i carry it in my heart) Our first love and loss 7/2/07
3 cycles clomid TI = BFNs
3 cycles clomid Ovidrel IUI = BFNs
6/27/08 Surprise BFP = chemical pg
IVF#1 July 08 BFP @7dp3dt
TTC #3 since February 2010
FET Sept. and Oct. 2010=BFN's
IVF#2 June 2011=BFP
DH just got me Dr. Luke's book for Christmas since he knew I had been wanting it. I'm reading it now.
My twins were only so premature because of the mono/mono condition (cord entanglement). My actual pregnancy was fine. I know I would've carried those babies for many more weeks if it weren't for that condition that I had NO power over...just like you had NO power over what your dc has/had. Twins or not, the power is just not in our hands.
You can carry twins to a very healthy gestational age, but like ANY baby...that does not gaurantee anything. I'm a freakin string bean (I weigh 100lbs soaking wet...pre-preg that is!) and I was TOTALLY fine even the day the babies were born...like I said, I know I would've carried many more weeks.
OH...and I have a baby who weighed just over 3lbs when born and he's totally FINE! Spent 4wks in the NICU and hasn't looked back. My other baby with problems didn't have these problems til he was TERM...meaning prematurity had nothing to do with it - MANY big babies born at 40wks has the same problem my little dude has. His low weight when it hit him hurt a lot, but it didn't CAUSE the problem. Just crappy luck.
In other words...worrying won't help...just try to be excited (some days will be easier than others) and focus on the positives...I HAD to do that...I just had to.?
It is scary and no, people who don't have multiples understand. Their filter disappears the minute they hear you are expecting twins. You have to just roll with the punches.
My pregnancy had issues from 21 weeks with Baby B not growing as much as Baby A. It had nothing to do with how I ate or what I did. It just was. It was a harrowing ride and we delivered at 29 weeks. Yes the NICU time is awful but it was also awesome. We forged so many friendships and it was the best place for our babies since they couldn't be carried to term.
Both of my girls are absolutely perfect. They both eat well, are smart and catching up to their actual age cognitively. It is a reality that your babies may need some NICU time but there are so many Mom's out there who have carried to term and their kids never spent any time in the NICU. Stay positive - a healthy mind and outlook is also so very important to your babies' development.