Puppy thoughts.

SRose1005 · June 2014

Hey all! So DH and I had been planning to get a puppy this fall, because we're both huge dog lovers and we're finally moving out of our "no pets" apartment and into a house. Of course now we're expecting a baby (our first) in January so we're not totally sure if we should still get one. We're also definitely revising our thoughts on which breed we might want. I have a cousin who breeds Bernese mountain dogs and we LOVE those so that was what we were originally planning to do, but now we're thinking such a big sheddy dog might not be a good idea. We're worried puppy and baby together will be a lot of work, but it seems to me if we get one in August/September we'd have plenty of time to house train them and get used to having a dog around before baby shows up in January.

Anyway I guess I was just hoping any of you who've had kids and dogs already could drop some knowledge on me about having a dog and a baby together. Is a smaller dog that much easier? Are there any non-shedding and/or hypoallergenic dogs that are particularly lovely? Any other factors we should probably consider? Thanks!!

miabambina · June 2014

Personally, I would wait. I have two dogs who were my babies and my life before my son was born. Don't get me wrong, they are still a big part of my life, but there are times when having them is just so inconvenient and frustrating. I NEVER thought I would feel that way. Wait until your children are older. Promise.

Stargirlb · June 2014

NO! don't do it! a puppy and a baby = hell. Many regrets.

MNgirl326 · June 2014

no way in hell would I consider having a puppy right now . No way.

SRose1005 · June 2014

Ok follow up question. So DH is worried that if we don't get one now we won't wind up getting one for 10 or more years, because we want 3-4 kids and we won't get a dog until the youngest is a bit older. How old would you say is "old enough"? How long would you wait?

Christina_Diane · June 2014

1. I would wait. A puppy and a newborn will be a lot of work.

2. When you are ready for a dog, please save a life and get a rescued dog instead.

MNgirl326 · June 2014

I was 14 when my family got it's first dog, so I am no help.

I guess if I were in your shoes and I really wanted a dog to add to my family, I would look at a dog that is already a few years old, trained and is good with kids. Is it the perfect pure bread that your heart is set on? No, But it will have far less health risks and it will already be trained, taking a lot off your families shoulders.

In my world, pure bread puppies are great, but if you aren't willing to look at mixed breads/older dogs, you really aren't ready to be a dog owner.

Stargirlb · June 2014

SRose1005 said:

Ok follow up question. So DH is worried that if we don't get one now we won't wind up getting one for 10 or more years, because we want 3-4 kids and we won't get a dog until the youngest is a bit older. How old would you say is "old enough"? How long would you wait?

I'd wait at least until the baby is 1 or 2... then reassess if you think you could also handle a puppy on top of all the crazy toddler stuff. If you are planning on adding more babies quickly too, I would absolutely wait even longer (sorry hubby) because the dog will get shafted. I felt guilty because I've ended up having a lot of resentment towards our dog. If your hubby works during the day, you will end up doing most of the dog work on top of the baby work, so keep that in mind when factoring in his preferences.

Maebb · June 2014

DH made me choose puppy or baby because he didn't think we could handle the financial and time responsibility of both. Then we had a baby, and when he was 8 months old we moved into a house, and I was like, "let's get a puppy now," but he thinks we should save for a fence first. And now that I'm pregnant with #2, the puppy is having to wait a bit longer. I know it's the responsible thing to do, but I agree that a puppy would be fun.

As far as breeds, we will likely get a rescue but hopefully something with some Weimaraner, Viszla, or lab.

jennyhatt · June 2014

I got my dog - a wheaten terrier- 2 months before I got pregnant with my first. He was a year once my daughter was born. I had no trouble whatsoever and he goes everywhere with us. He always walks so nicely beside the stroller (I use a haltie or gentle leader- named differently US vs Canada) and is so gentle. He chewed two of her stuffed animals right at the beginning but after that I never worried. I was consistent with walking him still- and because I'm a SAHM I am able to give him lots of walks and attention. People told me to wait till after we were done having kids bc I wouldn't have time for him. But maybe that's them? I think if you are realistic about what you can give your dog you know if it's the right or wrong choice. It bothers me when people don't have time to walk their dogs. I lead an active lifestyle so it was easy to incorporate him. Just be real with yourself. Do you get overwhelmed easy? Will you be able to do both? You know yourself and SO. That should help make your decision.
Ps I LoVe wheatens!!! Medium breed, hypoallergenic and lovely lovely temperament!

SRose1005 · June 2014

We're definitely open to a mixed breed, an older dog or a rescue, we'd just been planning on the bernie because my cousin has a litter that's due this summer and we were really excited because that's both of our favorite dog breed.

amiej1227 · June 2014

Have you thought about getting a rescue dog? If you want one soon but worry about the puppy stage with a newborn a shelter might have a good option for you. I would just make sure that the dog has been around small children first.

UberBiz · June 2014

I also will echo the "no way." My daughter's father and I got a puppy soon after we found out I was pregnant, and it was the worst mistake. I loved that stupid dog, but I could not devote the time/energy he needed (Pomeranian, very high energy) to even train him properly after the baby came. I wound up giving him away. I still miss him, but it was for the best.

On the other hand, some people may have the fortitude to be able to handle a dog and a new baby. I, for one, fully admit that I have no patience or any desire at all to own a dog.

2000cougar · June 2014

I've been turned down by 10+ rescue groups because DS is 4. We also looked at breeders for a dog that was a few years old. Sometimes, they have dogs that have issues showing or have had medical problems that are keeping them from being bred (c-section). Right now, we're putting off having a dog for at least 3 years. I wouldn't want a teething puppy around a baby. I also have a specific high-energy breed in mind and I know that I will not have enough time for the dog with a newborn. I usually will work with my dogs a minimum of an hour during the week and more on weekends.

Pips09 · June 2014

I would wait. Puppies are a ton of work. When I had my first baby, it was hard with my two well-trained older dogs, who did not have puppy energy. I would not want to have a baby and puppy at the same time (and your puppy will be a puppy for over a year).

longcat07 · June 2014

we wanted to get a dog, but with 4 cats already, a 4yo human child, and a baby on the way, no way in hell. it'll probably a while (till we have fewer pets) till it happens. SO has his heart set on a shiba inu because he had a coworker with a totally awesome one, and i've told him that's fine, but we need to get it from a shelter or rescue, AND we need to do training classes and such and get more active FIRST because shibas are escape artists and need a lot of exercise to avoid getting bored. i don't want to count on the dog to be my push to get more active...i want that to be a solid part of my lifestyle before the dog is here.

anyway, if we weren't waiting for our cat number to decrease first (our oldest two are 9-ish, so it could be a while), we'd still be waiting till bean sprout is 3 or 4, probably, just to be sure the kiddo can follow simple instructions regarding the dog. my experience is that most dogs brought up in a loving family are very gentle and tolerant with children, but that doesn't mean i'm ok with having a kid abuse a new dog and testing that.

edit: clarification

richardson0911 · June 2014

I have an almost 2 yr old lab mix who is AWESOME with any and all babies we run into. He's been on the floor with my neighbors 8 month old as he was ripping fur out of my poor pup's neck and the dog did nothing but lick the baby's face.
I will tell you, having a puppy is insane. No sleep, constant mess, crazy energy, nipping, clawing, climbing.
In some ways, I think the puppy might be somewhat on a schedule in January if you adopted it now and were extremely diligent about keeping a schedule and potty training. That being said, I don't think that small dogs are necessarily great with children, many small dogs are far more prone to biting. It really depends on the breed, and you can do research online where you can input your lifestyle and family needs to figure out the best breed for your home.
It can be done, but I would recommend against it. Give yourself some time to adjust to baby and then get a dog.

mellie86041 · June 2014

DH and I were looking into adopting a puppy around the time we found out we were pregnant with DD. At first we thought about just going ahead and getting the puppy, getting it trained and all that before baby arrived. We both agree that having pets in the house is great for kids. But in the end, we decided to postpone getting a puppy until DD (and future siblings) were a little older so we weren't trying to take care of a baby and puppy at the same time. Im really glad we did, because DD turned out to be a very active baby/toddler. I wouldn't be able to keep up with taking care of her and a dog right now! The cat is hard enough!

motherboy · June 2014

I will echo the sentiment that your perspective towards dogs changes after a baby. I love my shih tzu mix rescue dog, but sometimes when he barks and wakes up my toddler who I finally got to nap, it can be really tough to remember.

We had the dog before the kid and we babied the dog sooo much and treated him like a baby. He's adjusted really well, which we are so lucky for. I'm a SAHM too and I give him lots of walks and attention, so maybe that helped.

ETA to change some crazy autocorrects.

cls2015 · June 2014

I agree with what others have said. It's best if you wait. Babies and puppies each take and incredible amount of time. If you have both at once, somebody's needs are going to get ignored.

Another note, puppies don't yet understand how strong they are and they don't know to be extra careful with babies. As dogs get older, they somehow figure this out. A new puppy wouldn't have time to learn these things before baby is born.

Plus, every dog is different. Some train very quickly and others take forever. You don't know which you would get.

It all seems pretty risky to me.

tarynlphillips · June 2014

SRose1005 said:

We're definitely open to a mixed breed, an older dog or a rescue, we'd just been planning on the bernie because my cousin has a litter that's due this summer and we were really excited because that's both of our favorite dog breed.

Bernie's are AMAZING family dogs and their "puppy" stage can be shorter as their average life span is only 7-10 years. I think it's really a personal decision and only you and your husband truly know how much "extra" time you have in your lives. I have a 7 year old pure bred chocolate lab and we were all set to get another chocolate lab at the end of April from an incredible breeder. I literally found out I was pregnant the Monday before we were to pick up our new puppy. At first, I hestitated because 1-the money I could have saved on the puppy purchase could have bought us our crib, travel system, and breast pump combined and 2-I would have a newborn and a 9 month old lab puppy at the same time.

After thinking about it, we ended up getting the puppy (I really wanted a brother for my older lab). Puppies are MUCH easier and faster to potty train than an infant and not so difficult to train if you really work on it. If you are getting a puppy this summer, that will still give you at least 3-4 months to train the basics..and if you crate train, your nights will only be filled with newborn cries to be fed and changed...not a puppy that needs to go outside. It's one of those things that I figured, if we were to wait...we might not ever end up with a new puppy (or at least not for a number of years). My brother's and SIL's dogs both passed away right before my niece was born and they finally just go their first two family dogs a few weeks ago...my niece is 9 and my nephew is 6. I didn't want to wait 10 more years (and sadly, my Kona won't necessarily be around that long to enjoy a little brother).

Yes, puppies require a ton of work, attention, money, etc...but if it's really something you guys want, you can figure out a way to do it. I know rescue dogs that have been amazing and others that have had to be returned due to their temperament or other issues (you just don't always know their background). Labradoodles and Goldendoodles don't shed and are great as far as allergies go. Boxers are great family dogs as well...but I am impartial to my labs with Bernie's being my DREAM dog...I just can't deal with their short lifespan. We have multiple friends with them and they are all honestly the best dogs I've ever been around. A lot of smaller dogs are more territorial, have smaller bladders so accidents can happen more easily and nip more. No matter what breed, it really comes down to the training and being constant about it, socializing it as soon as it has all of its shots and having it around lots of different people.

Good luck to whatever you decide...keep us posted and if you get your new Bernie...post pics!!

rjharrison07 · June 2014

I just got a baby boxer from a breeder last week. I want these next 8 months to train her. Boxers are the best kid dogs and great w babies. Had many friends w boxers who were so great w kids and this is my second one. Lots of work now but keeping me busy and will be great for when baby is here!!

rjharrison07 · June 2014

Forgot a pic:)

TXUltraRunner · June 2014

If you've never owned a dog before, WAIT because a lot of people are overwhelmed with their first experience dog training and it just seems like too much stress. Young dogs need TONS of exercise....an hour a day and once you have a baby you probably can't accommodate that unless you hire someone or have a friend to do it for you. Dogs less than a year old also need routine, its the easiest way to train them and I'm not sure that you can keep the dog on a routine when the baby is not on one for a while. It would be frustrating to have to clean up poop off the carpet and poop from diapers at the same time.

GromMom · June 2014

Personally I wouldn't do it, my dog is older so maybe she's more work than a puppy (I doubt it) but seriously there are days when she won't take her meds and I end up in tears, covered in dog slobber. She's great with our two year old but if she weren't around I'd never get a new dog now, its a huge commitment and you have to take care of then whether you've slept or not, walk them even if it means you don't get to shower today because your day is over scheduled etc. we had a cat that we lost to cancer in October and we're still not sureifwe want the responsibility of a kitten and a cat is practically self sufficient compared to a dog! Sorry that its probably not what you want to hear, but its no walk in the park.

Beauxbaton · June 2014

miabambina said:
Personally, I would wait. I have two dogs who were my babies and my life before my son was born. Don't get me wrong, they are still a big part of my life, but there are times when having them is just so inconvenient and frustrating. I NEVER thought I would feel that way. Wait until your children are older. Promise.

This. Exactly this. I love my dog. He is the sweetest thing. Half black lab and half basset hound, I have never met a sweeter dog. I had him for 4 years before having my son and he is completely house trained and everything. But sometimes its still inconvenient and sometimes makes me feel guilty cause I dont give him as much attention as I used to. And he could really use a bath.

Puppies take a lot to train and have sharp nails and teeth. They chew on everything, and get under your feet. If you guys insist on a dog then I agree with a previous poster of adopting am older dog that comes from a family that had kids. Its tail and ears WILL be pulled once the babe starts getting around. So you want something that won't immediately snap.

radmamajas · June 2014

Dont do it!!!!!!!!

SRose1005 · June 2014

Well dang. The voice of reason is no fun. All good points though, thanks ladies!! I guess we'll probably make do with hanging out with my parents' and MIL's dogs for a couple years.

sydneygerten · June 2014

I personally would suggest waiting but if you were going to get one I would say sooner rather than later would probably be good so you can have as much time as possible to train! I have a havanese and so do my parents! My parents bought our oldest after having goldens for so many years because my sister was very young at the time and they wanted a dog that would be good with little kids (although there are many breeds that are great with small children!) and with a new house they wanted non-shedding and hypoallergenic. After lots of research my dad discovered havanese and we all fell in love!! I now have one of my own and they're just all great dogs!! you may find havanese in a google search with long hair.. we give our dogs puppy cuts.

jaxx723 · June 2014

I used to be a dog trainer and I can't tell you how many times I worked with tired, overworked parents who had little time or energy to invest into their dogs.

That being said, I seriously considered having a puppy and a baby around the same time too. Most people think I'm nuts and I've finally decided that it isn't one of my greatest ideas, but...dare to dream, right! We also have two dogs already, so it's really not ideal for us to try to integrate a puppy with our two current dogs and our first baby.

The best decision I EVER made as a dog owner was to rescue an older dog, especially when I was a first time dog owner. If you want to look into things, I'd highly recommend taking a breed matching quiz to find the type of dog suitable for your situation, and then start looking at local rescues. And while there is no such thing as a truly hypoallergenic dog, I do love that my house looks as if I don't own dogs because they have hair instead of fur. I groom my pups once a month and brush them every few days, but it's better than vacuuming the whole house twice a day!

The benefits with adopting older dogs were huge; no house training, no crazy puppy energy, and very little transition period when we first adopted them. Training was a breeze and integrating the second dog into the house was easy as pie. They both go to work with me, (previously at my dog training job, and now at a dog friendly office) and they are lovely guests who make little noise or disruption to my coworkers. Now that they are older, I'm feeling some of the negatives of adopting older dogs (higher risk of disease or accident and higher medical bills), but if I had to do it all over again, I'd still start with an older rescue.

I'd say just look into your options and make an informed decision on what you guys want. It's not impossible, but it's VERY expensive and time consuming to own a dog. Trust me, I just came home from the vet with a $4,000 bill for pancreatitis. No fun, but my furbaby is ok and luckily we have pet insurance.

NatureLovers · June 2014

I work in animal rescue, but I'll keep it brief. DON'T DO IT.

Puppies are way more work than what you're thinking, for longer than you're thinking. If you want a dog, get an adult dog that's trained, from a reputable rescue (please no breeders).

Also, keep costs in mind. A Bernese is super heavy, the cost for their food alone will be huge. Then take into account the cost for their heartworm and flea prevention monthly pills - the cost will be in the many hundreds. Then ordinary vet care like dentals will be crazy $$$ because it's based on weight.

SSCmomma · June 2014

I've done a lot of work in rescue and seen a lot of perfectly wonderful young dogs get turned over because dog and baby were too much to handle. Please wait. Give yourself time to adjust to a baby in the house. Then go adopt one of the many many 1-2 (or older) year old dogs that are already housebroken/trained and waiting at the shelter because their previous owner didn't realize that both dogs AND babies require time and effort.

dragontears507 · June 2014

I see this scenario all the time at work, and unfortunately it usually ends with the puppy, once grown out of the cute stage, ending up at the pound. If you're set on a dog, check your local shelters for a full grown dog who's been tested around kids, but a puppy sounds like a recipe for disaster.

misslizzy82 · June 2014

I would say an older dog is the way to go. Have you looked into any Bernese Mountain Dog rescues? I'm not sure where you're located but I did a quick google search and found a few. I got one of my dogs as a rescue puppy when he was 3 months old and getting him trained was pretty hard. I wouldn't want to do it with a baby on the way. He's a Lab/Collie mix and didn't grow out of his "puppy phase until he was well over 2 years old.

efujan · June 2014

We had our dog (small mixed breed) for 2 years before we had DS, and I think that was the right/minimum amount of time needed to acclimate her to our family, train her, and burn off some of that puppy energy before we added a baby to the mix. Now she and DS are total buddies, but I'm glad she wasn't any younger when he came along. If your heart is set on a dog, I agree with other comments about looking for an older dog from a humane society or rescue group. There are so many wonderful dogs out there that need good homes, and if you find a great dog that is a few years old, it could be a match made in heaven for you!

I saw someone post earlier about getting turned down from a rescue group b/c they had a LO - so please do your homework on that as well. I do hope you find a dog someday that will be a great fit for your family. Our little Mookie has been awesome!

MahriM23 · June 2014

Wait. I've wanted a puppy my entire life. I'm still waiting until my youngest child is school-aged (or at least 3 or 4). After waiting my whole life, what's 4 more years to preserve some sanity? Raising kids is hard. I know I will be able to really enjoy puppy time once my kids are a bit older.

kc192 · June 2014

This is a bit of a personal question since people handle things differently. Do you know what a puppy entails? Are you familiar with newborns? How do you handle stress and chaos? I have a friend who had a 6 month old and got a golden retriever puppy and then a few weeks later adopted a terrier from the shelter! She loved it and didn't think it was a huge deal. I personally would pee my pants just at the thought. When my kid was about 3 months old we puppy sat for a few nights and it was hell. DS had this exhausting phase where he wanted me to hold him ALL. THE. TIME and would cry if I didn't. This darn puppy had major separation anxiety or something and would scream and cry if I didn't hold him. It was miserable just trying to brush my teeth. So a puppy and a newborn? I personally wouldn't. But I'm a wuss. You're right, you'll have 9 months to train a puppy by the time your LO is born so hopefully by then it'll be potty trained and have some commands down well and I've known some very laid back Bernie puppies. But most 9 month old puppies are still high maintenance so when you're exhausted, sleep deprived, and trying to figure out nursing while keeping the dog from chewing up the diapers will you be ok or ready to pull your hair out? At the same time I'm also a dog lover and if you wait until all of your kids are a few years old it will be a decade before you own a dog! Personally if you are deadset on getting a dog i would seriously consider rescue from a place that has foster homes that can match a dog up with your living situation. We told the rescue about our family and that we wanted a younger dog that was extremely laid back, crate trained, house broken, and didn't mind chaos. We got the best st bernard ever. He was exactly all of those things and I could have handled him and a newborn without any problem. Especially if I had had him for 9 months prior. I like the idea of saving a shelter animal's life but on a selfish level I love getting a dog that someone else has put the hard work into that's past the puppy phase! So.. .I wouldn't necessarily say it's an absolutely terrible idea if you know exactly what to expect, but give yourself a chance of sanity and get something that will not be as high maintenance.

kc192 · June 2014

On to the bernese mountain dog note..... We absolutely love our st bernard. He's our second one and we specifically sought out the breed after our first once died of cancer. He's incredibly laid back, very tolerant, and never ever barks. He's basically the perfect dog. But... being the mom of a toddler and the host of many playdates I will say that even though he is not at all pushy he (like a Berner) is big and he has accidentally knocked kids down. Sometimes just with his tail.

He's very gentle but doesn't always pay attention to where DS is so the other day he almost pushed him off the porch when he turned suddenly. He's stepped on his feet with his gargantuan paws and almost sat on him a few times. I love him but I do not know what I'd do if her were hyper! I don't necessarily think a smaller dog is always better, but there are things to consider about a large dog.

kslice85 · June 2014

I say get the dog !

LaStella25 · June 2014

My vote is hold off on the dog.

My local shelter has prison dogs. They are trained by prisoners and then adopted out so they are already trained. That would be a good idea. They have also passed personality testing.

I have two dogs, one will be ten in August and the other one just turned ten. Believe it or not, they are both still extremely hyper and act like puppies. They have wayyy more energy than I could ever imagine.

I'm worried how they will be around the baby in January. They both love attention. I'm also worried about walking them with a new born. I take them out about five times a day. My female has a small bladder and gets UTIs. We are going to get a fence in the yard so I won't have to handle two leashes and hold a baby.

They are also very expensive. I spend about $50 a month on food, their yearly exams are about $150 each, and their Revolution costs a fortune. Not to mention dental cleanings ($400) and every time my female has a UTI I'm out about $150. My male had surgery to remove cancerous tumor. Let's just say I didn't get my wood floors I was planning on last year.

Should you feel the need to get your puppy fix, I would go to a friend or relatives house and spend time with a pup. Offer to puppy sit when a friend goes out of town. Or hang out at the dog park. All free

Shortstack06 · June 2014

I have a German Shepherd that we got when he was 6 weeks- he will be about 3 when the baby is born. He was so easy to house train, our last "accident" he had in the house occurred when he was 8 weeks old. We did crate train him at night(I was able to take him to work with me during the day) and this worked for us, we had him in there at night until he was about one and a half (we didn't use this as his punishment, I am completely against that). I am hoping to have the nursery done by the 30 week mark so I can train him to sleep in the nursery on a bed. While our room is right beside the nursery I feel I would be more comfortable with him there as an extra protection to the baby. I realize I will be vacuuming the nursery every day because the breed does shed, A LOT. I do brush him every other day, larger breeds usually take more maintenance. I realize I may not have the time once the baby comes, but I will have a lot of help from my husband.

A lot of our friends and family do have young children, so we did have them come over (which I can't thank them enough for) and he has been around kids and he does amazing. When they are infants he will sniff them and lay down right beside their carrier. The only issue we noticed is our friend's child that is about 1 isn't around dogs much and when the dog walks by him he startles and usually falls over.

I think with the right breed and great friends and family a puppy might not be too bad. If you do a rescue, make sure to ask how the dog is with children. Some rescues are very skittish around children from bad experiences. Look into obedience (training) programs also, we did two courses and I think that has helped a lot also. In the end, you have to do what is right for you and your husband. Good Luck!

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