Blended Families
VedaFlash
member
Options
Enforcing Custody Order
VedaFlash
member
So awhile back my teenage daughter was asking to live with her dad... Well since then, we now have a custody order so she's with me 3 days and BF 4 days each week. This is what she suggested and both her dad and I agreed. She still hasn't changed her mind about what she wants to do and BF still thinks she should live with him. I am absolutely trying to think of what's best for her and I'm stuck on 50/50. There's no abuse or neglect going on at my house so I don't see why I should agree to her living there. She is trying to tell me she doesn't want to come to my house for her days. This is legal now so what do I do if she refuses to come home? BF is clearly on her side so I'm not thinking he will be any help. So do I contact police? I don't want it coming to that but I don't know what else to do??? Any advice would be great. Sorry there's not a lot of info in this post but I'm short on time and big on anonymity...
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Enforcing Custody Order
Is she of age to decide for herself? We have been through this before with BM1 over SSs and SD. Due to circumstances they had previously gone through, the youngest was able to decide to go with BM or not at the age of 7.
But depending on state, there is an age they can decide on their own in the guidelines. Our state guidelines is 15..the last time I looked.. it may have changed, but I would look into that.
I hope you guys can work through whatever is making DD not want to come home. GL
My Loves= SD 18 SS 16 SS13 DD13 DS10 SD6 SD5
However as difficult as this will be to hear if you teenage daughter wants to live with her father I would strongly consider letting her. I am a child of a divorced home and so is my daughter so I see things from both perspectives. I actually moved in with my dad when I was about 13. I was not in any danger or anything but in my case my dads home was a more stable environment. I am in no way saying that yours is not for your dd.
As a mom I would hate to do something that might diminish my relationship with my dd. And I wonder if not allowing this for you dd will build up some resentment for her towards you. I think if I were in you shoes I would see about a trial run of say 6 months with dad and you having every other weekend or something. I would tell dd that unless she is in danger this arrangement won't change until y'all revisit it at the designated time. But I would also let her and your x know that you expect her to be at your house on your time with her. But I wouldn't pay to do any formal modification on you custody arrangement for now. Sometimes these things have a way of working themselves out with time. Good luck!!