NBR: T&P please

TradeMama · June 2014

My mom was just diagnosed with uterine cancer. She will most likely come live with me since she lives 12 hours away. Does anyone have any advice on taking care of a sick parent? I'm feeling kind of lost.

mfarmer0811 · June 2014

I'm so sorry!! No advice, just lots of prayers headed your way!!

Saraeay · June 2014

Sorry to hear about your mom. I don't have any advice for you, just well wishes!

StephBrim24 · June 2014

I have no advice but I'm so sorry she's sick and that you have to go through that.

jennbaylor12 · June 2014

I'm so sorry!! Lots of t&p for you, your mom and your family

cdnmomma · June 2014

I'm so sorry. Here we have home health care services such as personal support workers etc who can come to the home to help with bathing, hygiene , even cooking and cleaning etc. Maybe look into whether those services are offered in your community. It's government funded here so it's free as long as they find there is a need.

Ceventa · June 2014

So sorry to hear about your mom! Lots of T&P to you and your family!

Mafernj · June 2014

I'm really sorry you are going thru this. What about home care services? Idk where you live but there are a lot of agencies in nj maybe there are some in your area. They can have a home health aid come and do daily care for your mom since you have a baby that can help you a lot and I guess depending on what stage she is there are other services available. Hope this helps. T&p for you and your family

kare_bear_12 · June 2014

I took care of my father when he was sick in my early 20's with Lymphoma. He did not live with me but I was the only one that would check on him. Being the youngest and only girl, put alot of pressure on me and I broke down alot. But he needed my help and it was the only choice. He was in the hospital alot though. Honestly you need to just be focused on her care and be honest with the situation and in the moment. For me, taking care of my dad was my way of showing love. Sitting and watching TV. Doign his laundry, taking him to the Dr.

Even though I know he would pull through, we talked about funeral arrangements and his will. I was put on all of his accounts.They are never conversations you want to have and should never have to but its reality and better to be prepared than not.

You are a wonderful daughter for taking care of your mother. You can do this and reach out to your DH and friends for support.

10 years later, my father is in remission

coreyeliz · June 2014

I'm so sorry to hear this! Do you have any kind of long term disability insurance? I know some jobs offer it and it usually covers care of a sick immediate family member. That could help with cost or resources. I've never had to care for a sick family member, so I don't have much advice beyond that. I just wanted to send a hug your way and say I'll be keeping you and your mom in my thoughts.

TradeMama · June 2014

She feels fine right now, she only thought something was wrong because of irregular bleeding. We don't know what stage yet. My brother lives in the same town as her but they aren't very close and both he and SIL work full time. I wfh and DH is a physician. Both of my youngest go to daycare so it's easier for me to care for her, I think.

ProudMommy030614 · June 2014

I took care of my father from age 13 until 31 last year when he passed away at my house where he lived. At first I just did laundry and easy stuff until closer to when he passed and I did everything for him. I learned to just do don't ask because the answer was always no. We butted heads many times but when he passed I feel like I prolonged his quality of life. We used home health aides and visiting nurses a lot and eventually had hospice in our home. It was an excellent lesson for my older children also. If you ever need to chat I am here.

TradeMama · June 2014

My grandparents died when I was 17 from cancer/Alzheimer's. I've always regretted being so far away at the end and don't want that to happen with my mom. The goal obviously is to get her better, but if she is really sick I don't want to squander any opportunities, especially since we haven't always been close like we are now.