XP: WWYD Plans and DD's schedule

Myaflowers · June 2014

OK, I'll try to keep this short, but I'm not good at getting to the point. Anyway, DH has a friend whom he has known for years but we haven't seen them since before DD was born because they live about 1 hr and 15 min from us. Before we had DD we would get together occasionally (maybe 1 x per year). His wife is nice but we are not close. DH also used to be friends with the wife. They have 2 kids, ages 8 and 4.

DH and this friend are both into Hockey, which is a big deal because we live in Alabama, where no one is into hockey! With the Stanley Cup finals going on (and DH and friend's second favorite team playing), they are wanting to get together Friday night at friend's house to watch the game (if there is one). DH is home with DD on Friday while I work, so he would take DD over there in the afternoon, and I would drive over there after work (at least an hour with traffic). I would probably get there around 6:30 and would leave around 8:00 after dinner.

I would then head home with DD, who would sleep all the way home in the car and would be up until probably 12:30 or 1:00.Her usual bedtime is 10:00 but if she naps after 3:00 pm, she won't go down until much later. Last night, she was up until 11:30 after a 30 minute nap at 3:30. DH would stay behind to finish watching the game.

None of this sounds fun to me, but I'd probably just deal with DD's schedule being messed up except that I've already committed to hang out with my BFF (who has a 1 year old DD and I haven't seen since the fall) on Saturday, so we won't be able to sleep in much if DD is up half the night due to a late 1 hour car nap on Friday night.

I really want to tell DH to go to his friend's house without us and maybe we could go over there on a Saturday sometime soon. For some reason I feel guilty even though I know the who thing would be no fun at all for me.

WWYD? Thanks in advance and thanks for reading my novel!

Myaflowers · June 2014

Thanks, @Brendamndz! I feel better hearing that you wouldn't go either. I feel like a huge party pooper, but driving 2+ hours round trip to hang out for an hour or two AND messing up DD's sleep just sounds like a nightmare to me. Thanks for helping me feel better!

jobiann · June 2014

I'm a party pooper too. If it messes up DS's schedule and if it's something I don't really want to do I don't do it. DH gets annoyed sometimes. But he doesn't get up with DS in the AM's, I do. So it's my call!

aklawrence1 · June 2014

I would tell your H to go alone. His friend has kids so I'm sure they would understand. Messing up sleep messes with everyone. We don't mess too awfully much with sleep.
Nothing wrong with being a party pooper IMO... I do it. Sometimes people understand, sometimes they get upset, but in the end, its about DD. I've found they get over it pretty quickly.

Myaflowers · June 2014

Thanks, everyone! It's nice to know I'm not the only party pooper!

@Brendamndz, my BFF is also a SAHM and sometimes I feel like she doesn't understand how hard it is for me to make time to do things on the weekends, especially since she also lives 30 minutes away from me and anything that we do requires a 30+ minute drive. I prefer to stay close to home on the weekends because there is always so much to do with errands, laundry, etc.

jjdillie · June 2014

:::waves::: Hi, fellow Alabamian here! RTR!

I agree with PP's

Myaflowers · June 2014

jjdillie said:

:::waves::: Hi, fellow Alabamian here! RTR! I agree with PP's

Thank you! It's nice to see someone else from Alabama here! I'm sorry, I have to say it, though...War Eagle!

Also, it would be interesting to see who else can figure out what RTR means. Lol

OhBaby+2013 · June 2014

I can see your point, however I say go. It's not like you do it all the time and clearly you haven't seen this friend in awhile. And as much as your DH is going to see his friend I imagine he is also looking forward to showing off his daughter to his good friend. Can your DH take a playpen and then your DH can just put your DD down at his friends. Then when the game is over he can bring her home. You can stay home and make a trip as a family another time. Just another perspective. I know you said you have plans to meet your BFF Saturday but if you get to see her more often maybe you need to cancel or move your meet up to later in the day. Just a thought. I hate messing with DS's schedule too and I don't do it too often but I make an exception every once in awhile because there are some people we would never see if i didn't.

Myaflowers · June 2014

@EmilyK022, it just clicked for me that you're on both boards, too. Lol. I think that there is at least one more of us on both boards. @2013Mommy is on both, I know.

Myaflowers · June 2014

@OhBaby+2013, great ideas! I would LOVE to send DD and DH and stay home. I haven't had any alone time since DD was born! The problem is that I'm still nursing after work and before bed. I think she would be OK without it, but I'm not sure how my boobs would be. I've had mastitis 8 times, so I'm paranoid! I don't have a pump anymore either. I may take the risk for some alone time, though!

Canceling on BFF isn't an option because we haven't seen each other since October, and I canceled on her last week. Ugh.

OhBaby+2013 · June 2014

Alone time is heavenly. If your boobs can take it, I say go for it! But mastitis 8 times sounds no fun!

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