Pregnant after a Loss

Intro and baby after loss question,

First, hello! My name's Mel, and in September 2013 my husband and I had a beautiful baby boy. Long story later (if you're interested his story is in my blog, I have no trouble sharing it with strangers, but it really is long: lincolnsliver.blogspot.com), he passed away on May 14th two days shy of 8 months old. We're devastated, heartbroken, and lots of other adjectives.

The loss of our son didn't remove our desire for a family. After a lot of conversation we decided to start trying to get pregnant in the next month.

The reason I've been lurking this board is that I would love to be part of an online group of women supporting each other, but I'm not sure where I fit. That's where I'm hoping to find guidance from those who know the board best. I don't feel I fit with the TTCAL board, as the actual conception wasn't an issue for us last time around. But I'm not sure if this PGAL board is intended only for those women who had trouble conceiving, or if it's for ALL women who have had a loss. Does that include someone like me who isn't as worried about staying pregnant as I am about how I'll feel while pregnant and once the baby is born? My concerns are things like whether we'll love a new baby as much as we loved our son, or that we'll somehow compare the new baby to the amazing person we knew our son could have been. Are there other women here in this type of situation?

Thanks! If the answer is that this board, or the bump in general, isn't for me then that's ok. But if it is I'd love to stick around and get to know everyone's stories.

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Re: Intro and baby after loss question,

  • You know, I think that's a good idea. I'm not sure why I haven't been as drawn to the loss group, but I'm going to introduce myself to those ladies.

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  • I'm so sorry you had to go through that! I personally like the Loss board because I feel I can relate to many of the women there. I love this board to because there is definitely something unique about being pregnant after losing a baby. I struggle with your same worries about comparing babies and loving as much.

    I hope you are able to get through everything and find lots of support here!

    first son stillborn 7/20/13 at 39 weeks due to Acute Fatty Liver of Pregnancy
    It's a girl! Baby Anna was born August 3, 2014!

     
  • I'm so very sorry for your loss.
    BFP #1 09/26/2013 EDD 06/04/2013 MMC 11/01/2013
    BFP #2 05/15/2014 EDD 01/24/2015

    Pregnancy Ticker


  • I am so very sorry for your loss. I hope you find the ladies of the loss board welcoming and comforting. When you do get your BFP feel free to come back an join us!






     


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    Anniversary

    TTC Since 04/01/13 

    BFP #1 04/28/13 Its twins! EDD 01/08/2014 MMC confirmed 06/27/13 D&C 07/17/13

    BFP#2 05/19/14 EDD 01/30/2015 Please be our rainbow!

    My Ovulation Chart

    *~*~* All AL Welcome*~*~*


  • I'm so very sorry for the loss of your sweet Lincoln (((Hugs))).
    BFP #1 2/26/14 EDD 11/4/14 MMC 4/1/14 D&C 4/2/14
     BFP #2 5/24/14 EDD 2/3/15 MC 6/12/2014

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  • I just want to echo what the other women have said I'm so sorry for your loss and I hope you find a community here.
  • I am so, so sorry for the loss of your sweet boy.  ((((Hugs)))).  I hope you're back to PgAL soon.
    Began trying for a baby January 2012
    BFP 4.25.2013  EDD 1.3.2014  MMC 6.3.2013  D&C 6.19.2013
    BFP 11.3.2013  CP 11.6.2013
    BFP 3.31.2014 EDD 12.10.2014 Baby boy Carlson born 12.19.2014 
  • So sorry for the loss of your baby boy. I cannot imagine the grief and pain you have experienced. I think you have gotten good advice on which boards would be a good fit. I hope you are back to PgAL very soon. ((Hugs))!
    Pregnancy Ticker
    BFP 4/17/13, MC began 5/2/13 @ 6 weeks
    EDD 12/27/13
    TTC since 2/2013
    BFP#2 9/23/13 EDD 6/8/14
     
    My FF Chart


      
        
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  • I'm so sorry for your loss of your sweet Lincoln!  TTCAL is a great place for any woman that has suffered a loss.  I never spent time on the Loss board, but I know it's been home to a lot of women before moving on to TTCAL.  I hope to see you back PGAL soon.  Many, many (((((((HUGS)))))))) for you!
    TTC #3 since 8/2012 image
    DX Endometriosis 2/2002 (lost left tube due to a cyst), PCOS
    6/2010
     BFP - 10/18/2012, EDD - 6/26/2013, Baby Girl lost at 22 weeks (T21), D&E 2/15/2013
    BFP - 4/23/2014, EDD - 1/2/2015 Twin Boys lost at 12 weeks, M/C 6/25/2014

    My chart here  All ALers welcome!
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickersLilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    June 3Missing Our January Snowflake
  • Thank you everyone for your kind words. I truly appreciate it.
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  • JCM285JCM285 member
    I am very sorry about the loss of your son. I can not even imagine the grief. Please listen to PPs about the loss board. I spent a lot of time there and then I graduated to trying to conceive after loss (TTCAL). Like this board,the ladies in those boards are very supportive. Again I am so sorry and hope you find the support and peace you so deserve!
    Married my best friend 7/2/11 - Furbaby born 7/9/11 and brought into our home 9/1/11

    BFP#1:   2/2/13 ~ exact m/c date unknown but around 3/20 at 10 weeks ~ diagnosed with PMP ~ D&C on 4/5 ~ TTA for at least 1 year due to PMP ~ cleared to TTC 1/14

    BFP#2:   2/7/14 ~ m/c 2/20/14 ~ possibly due to chemical pregnancy ~ TG no D&C is needed 

    Surprise BFP#3:  4/4/14 ~ super duper extra happy (and nervous) about this one - EDD 12/9/14!!!

    John Joseph was born on 12/12/14 at 7 lbs. 11 oz.  He is the most beautiful rainbow baby we could have wished for!


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  • jnedenjneden member
    I'm so very sorry for your loss!!
    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • I think you've received great advice. Just want to say I'm sorry for your loss.
    Multiple TTCAL 1image
    image
     TTC #1 since March 2011 
    BFP #1: EDD 4/16/13~~blighted ovum w/ 2 gestational sacs~~Loss on 9/18/12
    BFP #2: EDD 9/3/13~~Slow HB at 1st U/S~~MMC -Loss on 2/13/13
    9/13, 10/13, 1/14: letrozole + trigger + TI = All BFNs
    3/14: IUI#1 letrozole/Bravelle/Menopur + trigger = BFN
    BFP #3: EDD 1/27/15 Please be our rainbow! ...Team Green


  • I am so sorry for your loss. I would definitely try the loss board out and come here as soon as you get a BFP.


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    "As long as I live you will live. As long as I live you will be loved."

    BFP#1 3/31/12 EDD 12/1/12,No HB 6/6/12 (14 weeks 4 days), D&C 6/11/12 (15 weeks 2 days)*Arabella Ann*

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

     

    BFP#2 5/21/14 EDD 1/27/15 *GROW BABY GROW*

     
     


     

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