Parenting

s/o not hovering over your kids.

The other evening, we came home and my kids saw the kid down the street playing outside. They grabbed their bikes and went down to say hi. I followed them just for the stroll (there is one house in between ours and the other kid's). All three played back and forth between the two yards for a while. I followed them down to his house one other time. The rest of the time I stood in our driveway. I wanted to go sit on our front steps, but then I wouldn't be able to see them because of how the cars were positioned. They were playing with sidewalk chalk, so my 3yo was a little closer to the street than I would have liked.

What would you guys have done? I stayed back, while still watching, but would you have sat down on the porch? Is this a dumb question?

Re: s/o not hovering over your kids.

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  • How well does your 3 year old listen to your 5 year old?  I probably would have told the 5 year old to make sure the 3 year old didn't go near the street and sat on my porch.
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  • TheBubTheBub member
    She would listen to him and has never gone in the street, but I know that doesn't mean that she wouldn't ever. ,

  • I prefer to have DD in sight.

    This article doesn't exactly change my mind on it, but it's food for thought. It's long but very interesting. (Tragedy is mentioned but the article is not tragic, it's anthropologic)

    https://www.theatlantic.com/features/archive/2014/03/hey-parents-leave-those-kids-alone/358631/
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  • I would definitely watch the 3 yo unless I knew the mom and did a bit of a hand off and she took responsibility. I don't have a 5 yo, but I would lean towards still watching them. 6-7 I would lean towards ok to go to neighbors out of sight 2 houses down. All kid/neighborhood dependent.

    DD Nov 2010 ~ DS June 2012
  • msdrdgmsdrdg member
    I let DS (almost 4) play in the neighbor's yard (with them) while I am out of site.  I'm still outside, but I can't always see him.  It is on a dead-end so traffic is not really an issue.  He plays in our yard by himself (not fenced) while I run in and out of the house doing things or I work in the yard not necessarily watching him.  I would not let him cross the street or go down the main road without me.
    The Book of Love Has Music in it

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  • TheBubTheBub member
    Ok, I feel good about what I did. We have a friend who would have sat on the sidewalk with them. I don't want to be crazy all over them, but I want them to be safe.

  • I don't care if anyone thinks I am a hoverer...I will always have DD in sight when we are outside for a very long time to come. My anxiety would go through the roof otherwise.

    This is me as well. People can judge me (I'm looking at you in laws) but this is just how our family works. DD is also anxious and doesn't like it when she is out of sight either...not necesarrily my sight but whoever is in charge of her at that moment.

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    Our Little Raspberry Born 3/27/12
  • DS is younger, but I tend to hover when we play outside. I don't want him eating dog poop (thanks, neighbors), playing with dangerous trash (thanks again, neighbors) or trying to crawl into the parking lot. 



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  • When we're talking about little kids near the road, I'm a hoverer. I let DD play in our fenced-in back yard with her 6 year old friend (my BFF's daughter) while we are inside sometimes. 
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    Our sweet girl is 3!


    Lilypie - (R7Ux)


  • DD is 3 and is stuck to me like glue at all times, so she is never out of my sight by her choice.

    If they were playing near a street I would probably have them stay in sight.

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  • My thing is can I get to them before there is a problem. If the3 year old were to wander in the street could you physically remedy that quickly?

    Right now I wonder if I can run into the kitchen grab the wine and a glass while she did in her pool. ..I can see the wine from whee I am
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  • I would have done the same if they were playing in the front yard with my 4 yo. My 7.5 yo I let play in the front without being in constant line of sight, but I check on her frequently. They both run free in the backyards with just frequent checks.
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