My husband and I have been sharing our favorite baby names with friends and family. We have a few names for boys and a few for girls. (We find out in two weeks what we are having!) All of our friends and my parents are very supportive of all of our names…My in-laws however do not disguise their displeasure at the names we really LOVE! It is making me feel like we have to come up with different names, I hate to give up a name that my husband and I both love just because they are so negative about some of our choices. Maybe it is the hormones, but I am getting really upset at the thought of my baby's grandparents making fun of and hating his or her name.
In my opinion, everyone should name their child exactly what they want. It is their baby, and they ultimately just know what is best for them. It is easier said than done to adopt that attitude when people closest to you are so negative about all of the names we pick! Are our names really that bad? How do ignore the negative comments & vibes my in laws give off each time we tell them a new name we are considering? They are always asking, so it is very hard to keep the names a secret until the baby is born!
These are the names they are griping about, are we crazy to like them?
Girl Names: Addison Bradley OR August Clarke
Boy Name(we only have one in the running so far): Avery Greyson
Re: Baby Names & In Laws...
Your name choices are NMS, but if you love them, then use them!
Yeah - my MIL doesn't like our names either, and even tried sending us new lists of names that she deemed "worthy" for her grandchild. Of course, all of her suggestions made us :-&
I don't care if she likes the names - neither does DH - and I have told her so - but I do understand what you are saying as far as having hurt feelings when someone tears a new one into something you totally love. I honestly don't think they realize how rude they are coming off to you. So you have to take it with a grain of salt.
I agree that if you don't want feedback, you shouldn't share names, but that is a moot point now because you have shared them, so now you have to stand your ground, tell you in-laws that's what you have chosen and they will get over it - I promise. Once baby gets here they won't care what you name him or her. And if they do - like I said, they will get over it.
TFMC 08.02.13 at 19+ weeks. Everyday I grieve for my little Olive.
--- end quote
This! With DS1, we didn't share our name and I don't think my ILs liked it. But they respected that it was our child and our name choice. DH fended them off with telling them that we hadn't decided on names and that we didn't want to share possible options with them.
Turns out my son's name is more commonly used for girls and we might not have given him that name if we had known ahead of time. We still love the name though and don't regret our choice. FYI, Avery is getting more popular for girls than boys so you might have similar issues with Avery as a boy name.
This is going to be the first of many battles you will have to fight with your ILs so it's probably best to deal with their pushiness now and nip it in the bud before they start being pushy about other things.
ETA: edited to show where previous quote ended
No one was pushier than my mom when it came to baby names. She was CONVINCED we were telling people and not her. She'd call my sister (who had no idea what names we were considering), and prod her for information.
Also you did ask in your first post if you were crazy for liking the names, and someone responded that she didn't like August because it's not a girl's name.
Name choices are just the first thing you'll be judged on by people during parenthood. Your birth choices, whether or not you breastfeed, your use or not of a pacifier, how you get your child to sleep, etc, are all things that yes, are not really other people's business, business, but people like to make it their business. It's best to start now with letting such things roll off of your shoulders as best you can.
bfp#4 3/19/2014 edd 12/1/2014 please let this be the one!
beta @ 5w0d = 12,026! u/s 4/22/14 @ 8w1d it's twins!
We will not share our names with anyone. I know people are pushy about wanting to know, but we will tell them names we like, but have decided not to use. That way they are happy to hear a name and we do not care about their opinions either way. When the baby is hear they will find out
I do know someone else in a similar situation. The in-laws did not like the name prior to the baby being born. So they came up with their own "nickname" and that is what they call the baby. Be prepared for that!
We didn't sahre out DD's name before birth for the exact same reasons you are describing-- not wanting to hear anyone's displeasure.
Are you asking for opinions?
I think August Clarke and Addison Bradley are amazing. For a boy. Why not consider them for a boy (if you both love them and that's what you are having?)
I have nothing bad to say about Avery Greyson--other than both names are currently quite trendy (not necessarily a bad thing, it's noteworthy, though)
In short, it sucks that sometimes people don't like the same names as you, but in this case maybe there might be a reason to re consider the girl names?
BFP 1- EDD 2/09/11 Missed MC DX @11 weeks D&C- 7/25/10 BFP 2- EDD 12/22/11 Natural MC @ 5w 2d BFP 3- EDD 1/25/12 DD Josephine born 1/16/12
I think they are very cute names. You should name your child whatever you want and not worry about what anyone else might think. If you have a meaning and a reason that are tied to those names and you both like them than go for it.
Get used to it. particularly if you name a girl August.
Not everyone is going to like the names you pick out. If you and your husband like the names, who cares if someone else likes it.
But again, if you choose to name your little girl August, you should develop a thick skin. Or listen to them, because there is a lot of wisdom if someone telling you that August is not a good name choice for a girl. Think of the baby.
LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:
I'm not debating. I'm telling you what most people will at least think when they hear August used for a girl. It has nothing to do with people having or not having compassion.
All if this. Sometimes when people have opinions you should ask yourself if they might have a point. Also you don't get to dictate responses. My advice would be if you use these names, get used to comments. I could name my daughter David if I want to. It's up to me. That doesn't make it a girls name.
He has, but she is very stubborn to say the least. We just have to decide which battles we want to fight at this point. Because of her "my way or no way" attitude, she is not allowed to keep DS unsupervised any longer. Too many things have happened in her care. It's rare that she sees him and it will be the same for DD. I'm not too worried about it; and as I said before, she's the one that will look like a fool for doing it. Let her make herself into a bigger ass. I don't care.