Discussion: Transgender at Age 5

ludali · May 2014

Has anyone see this story??? Care to discuss?

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2643231/When-family-dies-I-cut-hair-I-boy-Parents-share-story-having-transgender-child-let-change-gender-aged-just-FIVE.html

These parents are unbelievably brave - breaks my heart that they lost some family and friends along the way. The video shows that children know their gender by age 3 to 5 - pretty interesting! I really hope Ryland can lead a healthy/happy life, free from ridicule, but we all know society isn't so friendly. I don't know if I could be as brave as his parents - but what a statement to show their true love for their child. :-)

ETA: I understand if you ladies think this is too controversial for discussion.

ludali · May 2014

The comments are awful @mwalker710!!!!! I'm guessing many of them aren't parents...I stopped reading after a few and decided to just be happy for Ryland. :-)

TrueBeliever925 · May 2014

I love that they wholeheartedly embraced and took action to help their son determine his identity rather than deny it. I feel as though most parents would deny it.

The ONLY problem that I personally I see wrong with this situation is what happens if when he's older and decides he feels more feminine and wants to be a woman? I've heard stories of transgender people going through all the treatment only to want to be changed back to their birth gender. I mean.. technically it's not a problem... he could change back. But how does that affect him emotionally and physically? Going back and forth.

TrueBeliever925 · May 2014

That's why I avoid the comment sections usually. People are just mean.

TrueBeliever925 · May 2014

I agree to a certain extent @chelseamb11 about children being too young to understand.. but think about it. Don't you think it's easier for a kid to decide certain things just because it feels right or because they want it? It's so much simpler at that age. There are no complications. It's how Ryland felt. Not what he thought other people wanted of him or what he thought was morally right or wrong. Kids at that age are very independently minded (can't think of other words to use. damn mommy brain!). They like what they like and aren't worried about what other people are going to think.

ludali · May 2014

@TrueBeliever925 you said my thoughts in a waaaaaaaaaaaaaay better way - ditto to the above!

TrueBeliever925 · May 2014

ludali said:

@TrueBeliever925 you said my thoughts in a waaaaaaaaaaaaaay better way - ditto to the above!

I almost deleted it! I didn't think I was making any sense. Haha. Glad I got my message across. :P

thoughtfulmommy · May 2014

I've read about this family before. I think it is amazing that early on as parents they were able to see who their child really is.

I had a male student who was in grade five who identified as a female. The interesting thing was that all of the other students did not even think twice about recognizing him as a girl. Children are a lot more accepting and resilient than we give them credit for.

Coconuthead · May 2014

It is nice to see parents recognizing and supporting transgender kids.

ELauren88 · May 2014

chelseamb11 said:

Oh it makes total sense.
Like I said, I'm not in that situation. But it just worries me that this is more of a phase than a true transgender situation. Idk.. I just feel like they've gone past that "point of no return". People have been identifying Ryland as a boy for a long time now and if things ever change (which.. because of age, they very well could), it will be even harder IMO.

I'm not saying this to be bitchy...but I don't think you really understand what being transgendered means.

Think of it this way - did you wake up one day as a teen and go "man, I want to be a boy!"...no. You don't just flop back on fourth.

Sorry if that came off as super rude, I have a friend that is part of the statistic, and it breaks my heart that if people would have just accepted him when he was younger, he could have avoided a lot of pain.

ScarletOflaherty · June 2014

I don't think what they did was brave so much as it was common sense. What is the alternative in that situation? Continuously fight him and make his life miserable? Most people just want their kids to be happy, and I like to think that the majority of people out there would make the same decision in put in their shoes.

For those worried about what if he changes his mind, keep in mind they aren't doing gender reassignment surgery, so there is nothing permanent here. There is hormone treatments they can do at puberty if he is still sure he is a boy, and in that case he'd have gone pretty much his whole life as a boy, so it would be very unlikely he'd decide 5 years later he was a girl. Plus I believe the hormone treatments are reversible once you stop taking them, they are not at all permanent.

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