TTC After a Loss
jennadesigns
member
Intro (Living children mentioned)
jennadesigns
member
Hi girls - while I'm happy to be joining this group, I'm sad we all have to be here. Hugs to every one of you for what you've went through and what you're going through now.
I'm 35 and just recently had a MMC at 8 weeks, followed by a D&C. Today is my three-week follow up appointment to the D&C. This is my second loss in roughly a year ... last spring I lost a pregnancy at 7 weeks. I just had a feeling this entire pregnancy that something wasn't right, so when we went to the ulltrasound at 7.5 weeks and they couldn't find a heartbeat I wasn't shocked. It was like it confirmed what I already knew... that somehow I wasn't going to be able to take home this baby. I think I was numb for the first week ... and after that I became sad for what I'd lost and angry at the situation I was now in. At three weeks out, I'm still sad and it feels like I'll feel this way for some time. I'm trying to make myself do things that I was interested in before all this happened, like sew, read books and garden, but it feels forced some days. My partner doesn't really want to talk about the loss, so I often feel sort of isolated and that's why I've enjoyed lurking here. I'm a nurse and most of my co-workers on my floor know about the loss and have been really great, so I feel fortunate there.
I do have two children at home, an 11-year-old son and a 5-year-old daughter. I struggled with wanting a third child for a long time ... never really feeling like my family was complete. I actually said, while pregnant with this last one that if something went wrong and we didn't get to have him or her, I thought I could be happy with the two children I did have and they would be enough. Immediately after I lost the baby I felt this way too ... but shortly after that, things changed and I find myself feeling again like my family is not complete, like something is missing (which I've felt for more than a year now following my first loss). I'm supposed to decide today at my doctor appointment if I want the Mirena IUD put in because I'm done having children ... and I just can't do it. My partner said we could talk about trying for another one in the future when our emotions weren't so raw, so I think he will at least consider the idea - or hear me out on why I want to TTC again.
So, right now, I'm sitting on the TTA bench, hoping very much to join the TTC women on here. I'm waiting on my first AF following the D&C and hoping it's not going to be terrible like some of the stories I've read on here. And I'm hoping my cycles are normal following all of this so if we do TTC, it won't be a struggle. (I should say I've dealt with primary and secondary infertility with both of the children I do have, so I have the utmost respect and understanding for what some of you are dealing with.) I've posted to the TTA group once and introduced myself over there, but I thought I'd say hi to all of you ladies in the general group too. I look forward to getting to know you all.
I'm 35 and just recently had a MMC at 8 weeks, followed by a D&C. Today is my three-week follow up appointment to the D&C. This is my second loss in roughly a year ... last spring I lost a pregnancy at 7 weeks. I just had a feeling this entire pregnancy that something wasn't right, so when we went to the ulltrasound at 7.5 weeks and they couldn't find a heartbeat I wasn't shocked. It was like it confirmed what I already knew... that somehow I wasn't going to be able to take home this baby. I think I was numb for the first week ... and after that I became sad for what I'd lost and angry at the situation I was now in. At three weeks out, I'm still sad and it feels like I'll feel this way for some time. I'm trying to make myself do things that I was interested in before all this happened, like sew, read books and garden, but it feels forced some days. My partner doesn't really want to talk about the loss, so I often feel sort of isolated and that's why I've enjoyed lurking here. I'm a nurse and most of my co-workers on my floor know about the loss and have been really great, so I feel fortunate there.
I do have two children at home, an 11-year-old son and a 5-year-old daughter. I struggled with wanting a third child for a long time ... never really feeling like my family was complete. I actually said, while pregnant with this last one that if something went wrong and we didn't get to have him or her, I thought I could be happy with the two children I did have and they would be enough. Immediately after I lost the baby I felt this way too ... but shortly after that, things changed and I find myself feeling again like my family is not complete, like something is missing (which I've felt for more than a year now following my first loss). I'm supposed to decide today at my doctor appointment if I want the Mirena IUD put in because I'm done having children ... and I just can't do it. My partner said we could talk about trying for another one in the future when our emotions weren't so raw, so I think he will at least consider the idea - or hear me out on why I want to TTC again.
So, right now, I'm sitting on the TTA bench, hoping very much to join the TTC women on here. I'm waiting on my first AF following the D&C and hoping it's not going to be terrible like some of the stories I've read on here. And I'm hoping my cycles are normal following all of this so if we do TTC, it won't be a struggle. (I should say I've dealt with primary and secondary infertility with both of the children I do have, so I have the utmost respect and understanding for what some of you are dealing with.) I've posted to the TTA group once and introduced myself over there, but I thought I'd say hi to all of you ladies in the general group too. I look forward to getting to know you all.
BFP 3/30/13, MMC and D&C 4/19/13
BFP 4/8/14, MMC 5/5/14, D&C 5/9/14
BFP 8/26/14 Due date 5/8/15
BFP 4/8/14, MMC 5/5/14, D&C 5/9/14
BFP 8/26/14 Due date 5/8/15
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Intro (Living children mentioned)
BFP #2 6/12/14, DD born 2/21/15
TTC#1 since June 2012
Dx: Unexplained Infertility / AMA
BFP after 4th IUI cycle with Gonal F + Ovidrel on March 2014 | EDD 12/7/14 | MMC on 4/14/14
IUI#5 with Gonal F and Ovidrel trigger on 6/6 - BFN
On to IVF #1 with a new RE. Started Gonal F and Menopur on 8/15. Added Ganirelix on 8/24. Trigger on 8/26 for ER on 8/28. 8R 7M 3F. Transferred all 3 on 8/31. BFP on 9/11 | EDD 5/20/15 - Beta #1: 56.7. Beta #2: 97. Beta #3: 1148. Beta #4: 3559. Beta #4: 7678. MMC confirmed on 10/13. D&C on 10/14 at 9w. Confirmed male with Trisomy 14.
On to IVF #2 in March. CCS Testing on 2 embies. No go. Waiting to start IVF #3 in July. Surprise BFP on 6/14! EDD - 2/20/16 - Beta #1: 121.4. Beta #2: 236.4. Beta #3: 2014.
US (with RE) 3/24/2014 (two healthy HB), US (with OB) 3/31/2014 (three healthy heartbeats)
BFP#2: 10/22/14 | (beta #1 75, beta # 2 219) | EDD 7/3/15 ~*Please be our RAINBOW*~
PgAL welcome
Married 6/11/2011
Me & Hubby: 34
TTC journey started 12/2012
BFP #1 6/5/2013, MC confirmed 6/26/2013 @ 7 wks
BFP#2 8/25/2013 MC confirmed 10/16/2013 @ 12 wks (D&C 10/18)
Diagnosis: unexplained RPL, unexplained IF.
Also have hypothyroidism
Started TTC again 12/2013
IUI#1:Clomid CD 3-7, Trigger'ed CD 12. IUI CD 14. BFN
IUI #2:Letrozole CD 3 - 7, Follistim CD 9, Trigger CD 10, IUI CD12. BFN
Current plan: IVF with PGD. Antagonist - Vivelle Protocal. Stim start 12/1. ER 12/14.
http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/502498
TTC #3 since June 2013
BFP #1 7/21/2013--EDD 3/30/14--D&C 9/24/13
BFP #2 1/28/14--MC 2/7/14
IUI #1 5mg Femara + trigger = BFN
IUI #2 5mg Femara + trigger = BFN
IUI #3 5mg Femara + trigger = BFN
My Ovulation Chart
My Ovulation Chart
DH: 45
BFP #1 3/19/14 EDD 11/29/14 MMC D&C 4/24/14
BFP #2 12/4/14 Beta #1 218 at 12dpo Beta #2 1055 at 16dpo
Saw heartbeat 12/29. Please be a rainbow.
All welcome
Married August 2003
BFP #1: EDD 05/27/2014 (D&C 10/17/2014)