Moms With Colicky Babies

nycgirlkat · May 2014

Come on in (if you have been able to put your LO down for more than 5 minutes). I thought I'd make a little thread for us to vent, chat, support each other, compare notes, etc. so we feel a little less alone. I don't know about you, but when I make my 5 minute run to Buy Buy Baby for formula and see all the moms there with adorable, sleeping, happy babies (which seems like all of them) I just want to run to the nearest set of shelves and just clear it all off onto the floor in a fit of mad jealousy! My LO is a month today and just when I thought the colic was getting a little better, we had the day and night from hell. No sleeping for more than 10 minutes at a time, crying/wailing, fussing, and arms and legs akimbo. DH had to take over for me at 3 am so I could get some sleep. She is now finally sleeping peacefully (on my chest of course) after a bottle. I bought one of those k'tan things, epic fail. I got an Ergo, but it's just too big (for both of us) to use right now. I'm going to start drinking vodka instead of coffee (one perk of FF). How you ladies holding up?

pete0121 · May 2014

Oh we are in the trenches. I hate every other mom and baby I see. You know if you did clear the shelves in a mad fit of screaming rage, all the babies, including yours, would sleep through it. And as soon as you got in the closed in box of a car, yours would start the screaming. Or is that just mine.

This is our third baby like this. We are over it. I'm so tired of "soothing" babies. And I use soothing freely because there's no soothing.

Edit because I hit send to soon.

selina1113 · May 2014

I read that colicky babies are smarter. May not be true, but it makes those of us with difficult LOs feel better, right?

nycgirlkat · May 2014

And all my husband and I do is fight...If I don't end up in jail for disturbing the peace, I'll be in divorce court! Does anyone else feel like they never get anything done due to the constant soothing? I sometimes go a day without eating due to it.

pete0121 · May 2014

@nycgirlkat‌ I could've written this with each of my babies. It's a total marriage strain. This time though we commiserate together. Seriously if people heard what we said behind closed doors to vent to each other we would have our children taken away. Of course it's not that bad but we definitely say things we don't really mean to get our frustrations out. Last night she had a good night so we sat on the couch and bitched about her for an hour. She was laying in her RNP in the other room. It felt good to get it out. People without truly colicky babies won't get this, and think we are horrible. But in order to keep our cool around her we have to. Then we made out like teenagers. You should try it. Lol.

sugarrush · May 2014

We had two really really awful weeks with our LO. I thought my life was over, lol! It gets better ladies. We are in week 6 and she's calmed the hell Dow . Nothing worked before, she hated life. I *felt* like what worked for us was trying our best to keep calm and be soothing. If either me or DH were just ready to lose our shit, we'd pass off the baby to each other and leave the room and whoever had the baby just tried to be as soothing as possible. I think it helped. Gripe water helped too, I think. Hang in there, it does get better!!

Starfish+77 · May 2014

Yes this shit sucks. I get very frustrated with him and screamed at him to shut up today. Not my finest moment... I know these a light at the end if the tunnel but this shit blows. He cries so much that I have difficulty knowing when he's hungry. I basically just feed every 3 hours. This too shall effing pass!

nycgirlkat · May 2014

Yes, same here @starfish+77. Only I scream constantly at the dog because he whines and barks when LO starts screaming. I also have the same difficulty with determining the hungry vs colic crying. And of course it's recommended to not overfeed colicky babies, but who the hell can tell?!!

nycgirlkat · May 2014

Also, who else has been refusing company because of the colic??? I have friends and coworkers that constantly call wanting to visit, but since I can never get a shower, clean the house, get DD to calm down, etc I just can't deal with having people.

One coworker determined to visit came by (even though I asked her not to) during one of DD's episodes and had the nerve to ask me, "what is WRONG with her!?!" I wanted to beat her, but I asked her to leave (nicely).

Holljade · May 2014

nycgirlkat said:
Also, who else has been refusing company because of the colic??? I have friends and coworkers that constantly call wanting to visit, but since I can never get a shower, clean the house, get DD to calm down, etc I just can't deal with having people.

One coworker determined to visit came by (even though I asked her not to) during one of DD's episodes and had the nerve to ask me, "what is WRONG with her!?!" I wanted to beat her, but I asked her to leave (nicely).

That is so effing rude. I had someone say something similar when DD was a baby and it made me so upset. I think when you have a kid who screams all the time it's totally normal to not want to be around other people

pete0121 · May 2014

So yesterday she started about 10 am beig fussy. She's so hard to get to sleep and then gets overtired/overstimulated so quickly which leads to terrible nights. Last night the screaming starte about 9:30. By 11:45 DH and I were worn out from soothing all day. Out of frustration I swaddled her up, tucked her in her RNP and DH and I sat on our deck for like 5-10 mins in silence. I felt terrible leaving her in there to scream but I just couldn't anymore. When I came in I scooped her up and rocked her and she fell asleep in like 3 minutes. DH said he was reading that an overstimulated baby sometimes needs to just cry to release their tension. For the first time, I felt needed. She looked so relieved when I came back...which made me feel terrible and good at the same time. When your baby is so colicky you often dot even feel loved.

Ashleypixie · May 2014

I'm so glad I'm not the only one dealing with this! This is my third miserable baby, and I feel like such a shitty person for not knowing how to deal with any of them. I just stick things in her mouth all the time. I had a meltdown the other day when a friend with a baby the same age posted a video of her happy smiley baby. Mine has never smiled. I can't leave the house because when I do she flips her shit and strangers make comments and offer suggestions like, "maybe she's hungry or needs a diaper change." Oh my god, why didn't I think of these things! My other kids leave the room when she cries and I feel like I'm ignoring them. Now they're out of school they want to go to the pool and there is no possible way I can make that happen. I feel so bad for them. Everyone tells me how difficult it is to have a newborn and how important it is to get time to myself but not one of them has offered to take her for an hour for me to do that! Remember when we were all pregnant and just so ready to have our babies? I'd stick her back up there if I could until she is over this stage.

pete0121 · May 2014

@Ashleypixie‌ let's be besties because this is me too. 3 miserable babies and all. And my names Ashley too.

justxlaugh · May 2014

The worst is when DH and I try everything for hours upon end and then grandma takes him for 3 seconds and he falls asleep. He hates us.

Ashleypixie · May 2014

pete0121 said:

@Ashleypixie‌ let's be besties because this is me too. 3 miserable babies and all. And my names Ashley too.

We can totally be besties cause all of the best people are named Ashley

nycgirlkat · May 2014

I hear you, @pete0121‌, my DD is like that all day long! She really doesn't like to nap during the day so she gets overstimulated and then gets super-cranky and cries/fusses all day. Thankfully at night she sort of settles down, but holy crap! I never leave the house with her, I always beg my sister to come watch her so I can run to the store for 10 minutes or take a fast shower!! I put her in the carriage to walk around the block just for some air and she screams bloody murder....All the speed walkers in the neighborhood just walk past me and give me that "knowing smile". I want to pick up a rock and smash them with it while holding DD in my arms and trying to push the carriage home because she is inconsolable. I'm so glad we all feel a little less alone. This colic stuff is HARD to deal with. Sometimes when I go out for a few minutes on my own I think about what it would be like if I kept driving and didn't go home. Then I feel like a shit mommy and race home.

sueann911 · May 2014

I'm so glad there are others out there! DS screamed his head off in BRU the other day in his stroller. People thought I was cutting his limbs off but I wanted to scream back at them, IT DOESNT MATTER IF HES IN THE STROLLER OR CARRIED, HE WILL SCREAM. STOP STARING FUCKERS!
But seriously, wearing him has helped, as well as gripe water. At first he resisted the moby and ergo but he's doing better now and falls asleep after a quick stroll in the yard. He still HAS to nap on me and putting him down is never an option but at least he's quiet for a while.

JanMommy2under2 · May 2014

my son is 10 weeks old and just starting to improve since 4 weeks old, its exhausting!!

EhTheCatLady · May 2014

This. All of this.
I feel like such a shit mother sometimes bc all he does is cry. It doesn't matter what I do. Dh asks, does he need a dp change or is he fed. And I swear I wanna throw something at him. He works fulltime so I'm stuck at home with the baby and the dog. (Whom I wanna kill on a daily basis) i love this thread, I don't feel so alone. I haven't admitted to anyone that he is colicky. I just tell family and friends, I'm tired or liam had a rough night so I don't have to put up with others. Dh works allll day 9am to 11pm so he doesn't know how bad it is, he thinks its just at night that liam bcs a terror. It's almost like I am ashamed. I am FTM and I feel like people will think its my fault he's colicky and there's a good chance I would snap on someone. So I sit home alone with a screaming baby and a barking dog.

pete0121 · May 2014

Yesterday DD had an amazing day. Napped, didn't go bar shit crazy in the car, laid on her activity mat, took a family walk. Basically she acted like a baby should.

Is it bad I worried all day that she was sick. #colicmomprobs

RedBird11 · May 2014

I totally know how that is @pete0121‌ On good days I start to wonder if something is wrong. Shouldn't he be crying? Haha. Ironic isn't it?

nycgirlkat · May 2014

Usually when it's a good day, I pass out on the couch along with her. Naps are few and far between these days. We had a close friend over for a visit this past Saturday and LO was perfect! My friend asked, "do you really think it's colic?" I told her to call me tomorrow as I was sure she'd be a mess the next day.....and she was! @EhTheCatLady‌, I'm a FTM too and I've already banned most if not all visits to the house. We never go out, just for neighborhood strolls where she wails bloody murder anyway. Colic is very overwhelming and makes you feel so inadequate as a mom!!!

nycgirlkat · May 2014

Right now, LO is in her bouncy seat next to me on the kitchen table and I've got the microwave fan going full speed and she is passed out....I'm going to need a microwave in every room of the house!

Ashleypixie · May 2014

@pete0121‌ Everyone and their mother posted something on Facebook an article about secondary drowning (where an infant or child inhales water and over the next several hours their lungs fill up with fluid and they die) If it's a real thing it's terrible. She wasn't having a meltdown before bed and slept till 5am and I actually woke up to check on her! She chokes a little while eating so I actually thought for a second that she drowned in her sleep! And then she woke up and resumed her usual screaming self so now I know she's ok. And @EhTheCatLady‌ My husband doesn't seem to believe me either. She's asleep when he leaves work and goes to bed an hour after he comes home. And I hate my dog too.

nycgirlkat · June 2014

Hey colicky baby moms. As I read on the boards about schedules and routines I wonder. Do any of you have a routine? DD is just over 5 weeks old and everyday we fly by the seat of our pants. I try to get a routine going one day (like feeding/burping, diaper change, play/interaction time and nap), but the next day it just goes to hell. I'm an Executive Assistant and I love schedules and order and organization and so colic has really thrown me for a loop....I feel like we'll never hit a rhythm. What are you ladies finding?

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