Feeling down

lovemybellag · May 2014

I don't know why but I'm not feeling good about this cycle. Felt much more positive last cycle when I didn't even know if I ovulated or if timing was good. I feel like I should relax more but can't stop thinking about TFAS. I feel terrible because I know people in real life struggling for #1. I think a combination if DD growing up and knowing she took 2 years is getting me a bit down. Was hoping for two more but am 32. Would be happy with another and then if baby number three comes along naturally would be happy but don't think we will use assistance for number 3. But first need to TTC #2. Also knowing that others in family are TTC and waiting for announcement. I should not feel like this. I should be happy that I have DD already (I am ecstatic) but also longing for another baby. I know this us a jumble of words so sorry just needed a place to vent. I need to mentally prepare myself for another long TTC journey and in meantime not obsess and concentrate on DD. Thanks for letting me vent. Welcome any words of advice encouragement or shunning for posting this. Hopefully I will feel better once I can confirm I am actually ovulating again while weaning. But then I'm scared that I won't get pregnant and will be disappointed. Until now I can always say well maybe I'm not pregnant because I am not ovulating yet. Ok will stop now. Thanks again for this venting and jumble of words.

lovemybellag · May 2014

I also think this us exacerbated by my telling my real life family member I am down (didn't mention it was TTCR and her response was that she was sorry but she's really busy right now bad can't meet up.

lovemybellag · May 2014

Joy2611 said:

lovemybellag said:

Was hoping for two more but am 32.
I'm sorry you're feeling down.

My sister had her first child at 35 and her second at 37. They're considering a 3rd. Being 32 is not a death sentence for having multiple children....

That's very true. I'm just not sure how long each will take.

Segoody · May 2014

I'm ttc #1 at 32. Don't stress. Every single woman in my family had all their babies in their 30s. A couple in their 40s. Science and medicine have your back.

[Deleted User] · May 2014

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KatzKiss · May 2014

Just because you have a little one already doesn't mean you can't feel discouraged about the TTC process. People make plans for their lives and it's normal to be disappointed if that plan doesn't work out. It's also okay to feel emotional about friends and family getting pregnant. A lot of us feel that way. Please don't worry about being 32. I was 37 when I had my first. You have plenty of time. Until then, enjoy that beautiful baby girl. TTGP is a mindfuck. Your emotions will be all over the place. Totally normal!

mommy2C · May 2014

I hear you OP. I'm 32 in November and am also TFAS. I thought *for sure* that I would be holding a baby in my arms by now or would at least be pregnant. Due to a number of circumstances that isn't the case and I'm pretty sure C will be 3 or 4 before we finally have another baby to complete our family (she is 2 right now). I definitely feel anxious and sad that things haven't turned out as I envisioned and I don't know when it will happen or what we may have to do to get there. It definitely sucks but all we can do is keep on trying. Allow yourself to feel how you feel in the moment and just know that it is normal to have those feelings.

BillyHorrible · May 2014

Are you weaning right now? Be kind to yourself, weaning is an emotional and hormonal roller coaster. You're going to feel sad, angry, nostalgic, and it's all part of the process.

Remember to validate your feelings. It's okay to be sad about your daughter growing up. It's okay to want another without taking away from the gratitude you have for her. You can feel both. You can also be concerned about your own struggles without taking away from the fact that others are struggling too. Your fears and struggles are just as real.

I hope you get some answers one way or another soon. It's hard to be in limbo.

janda426 · May 2014

I'll be the asshole

/blog

MrsP924 · May 2014

I'm sorry you are feeling down. I will be 31 soon and I'm TTC for my first and I always thought I would have had kids by now. But such is life. Try to relax and keep your mind busy with hobbies and try not to stress to much. I know it's hard believe me I do.

JordanL1221 · May 2014

I'm sorry you're feeling down. We are officially TFAS next month and I am already stressing. I hope you feel better soon.

mommy2C · May 2014

janda426 said:
I'll be the asshole

/blog

We're starting to really narrow down what types of posts are acceptable around here. Pretty soon this won't be a TTGP board at all but a board for Buzzfeed quizzes (which I love thank you very much) and everything but TTGP and what goes along with it!

shlittertoots · May 2014

KatzKiss said:

Just because you have a little one already doesn't mean you can't feel discouraged about the TTC process. People make plans for their lives and it's normal to be disappointed if that plan doesn't work out. It's also okay to feel emotional about friends and family getting pregnant. A lot of us feel that way. Please don't worry about being 32. I was 37 when I had my first. You have plenty of time. Until then, enjoy that beautiful baby girl. TTGP is a mindfuck. Your emotions will be all over the place. Totally normal!

@katzkiss I've been having a tough week and your comment made me feel better. Just sayin'-- that was well put.

mommy2C · May 2014

NachoBelley said:

mommy2C said:

janda426 said:
I'll be the asshole

/blog
We're starting to really narrow down what types of posts are acceptable around here. Pretty soon this won't be a TTGP board at all but a board for Buzzfeed quizzes (which I love thank you very much) and everything but TTGP and what goes along with it!

umm i like you and all, but no....there will always be the W2O and 2WW threads...BFP's....random but helpful questions.... There's always going to be NTTGP related stuff because there's not a WHOLE lot we need to discuss if people understood what their bodies did..by LEARNING. Promise you it will always be a TTGP board.....

---quote---

@NachoBelley‌...I was just trying to be funny which didn't translate well this time. A fail on my part. Where is that Homer Simpson backing into a hedge gif when you need it?

mommy2C · May 2014

NachoBelley said:

mommy2C said:

NachoBelley said:

mommy2C said:

janda426 said:
I'll be the asshole

/blog
We're starting to really narrow down what types of posts are acceptable around here. Pretty soon this won't be a TTGP board at all but a board for Buzzfeed quizzes (which I love thank you very much) and everything but TTGP and what goes along with it!

umm i like you and all, but no....there will always be the W2O and 2WW threads...BFP's....random but helpful questions.... There's always going to be NTTGP related stuff because there's not a WHOLE lot we need to discuss if people understood what their bodies did..by LEARNING. Promise you it will always be a TTGP board.....
---quote---

@NachoBelley‌...I was just trying to be funny which didn't translate well this time. A fail on my part. Where is that Homer Simpson backing into a hedge gif when you need it?

probably comprehension fail on my part...i was thinking this didn't sound like you...

---quote---

Haha My sarcasm/wit skills fall drastically after 11pm. If I have to think about it too hard I probably shouldn't post!

mommy2C · May 2014

NachoBelley said:

mommy2C said:

NachoBelley said:

mommy2C said:

NachoBelley said:

mommy2C said:

janda426 said:
I'll be the asshole

/blog
We're starting to really narrow down what types of posts are acceptable around here. Pretty soon this won't be a TTGP board at all but a board for Buzzfeed quizzes (which I love thank you very much) and everything but TTGP and what goes along with it!

umm i like you and all, but no....there will always be the W2O and 2WW threads...BFP's....random but helpful questions.... There's always going to be NTTGP related stuff because there's not a WHOLE lot we need to discuss if people understood what their bodies did..by LEARNING. Promise you it will always be a TTGP board.....
---quote---

@NachoBelley‌...I was just trying to be funny which didn't translate well this time. A fail on my part. Where is that Homer Simpson backing into a hedge gif when you need it?

probably comprehension fail on my part...i was thinking this didn't sound like you...

---quote---

Haha My sarcasm/wit skills fall drastically after 11pm. If I have to think about it too hard I probably shouldn't post!

maybe we should start "italicizing" for sarcasm font...

---quote---

Me thinks this would be a good idea.

lovemybellag · May 2014

Thank you ladies for such kind words and advice. I'm going to try to enjoy each day and try not to obsess so much. Thanks for the support.

niki1209 · May 2014

I'm sorry, and completely understand! I agree with PP, 32 is not a big deal! I think you should get a pedicure this weekend to cheer up

jaytee16 · May 2014

I am sorry you're feeling down. I expect I will be nervous whenever we are TFAS too since #1 is taking so long, so I can understand how you might be feeling that way. However, you just intro'd last month stating you were going to start trying May/June, so you've really just begun. I have heard lots of stories of people struggling with #1 and going on to get KU with #2 in a regular time frame for TTC, without any issue. I hope that will be the case for you, just don't expect it to happen your very first month back at ttc. Good luck.

SpartanChick88 · May 2014

I feel ya! I'm 35 and TFAS. DD will be 4 in October and I'm worried about my age, the age difference, handling a newborn/toddler when I'm a little older considering how exhausted the first time through made me.. and how tired I am now. Too much to worry about and that's putting the cart waaaaaaay before the horse so I've decided to do my best and it is what it is. That said, CD1 is still quite the bummer. Hang in there!

PinkRoses53 · May 2014

I'm sorry you are feeling down. I am 32, as well, and TFAS. I thought it would be easier to not obsess since I can just be thankful for my son but I am almost more worried this time bc I have a timeframe in my mind. Hang in there and know you are not alone!

theholmanherd · May 2014

Sorry you're feeling down. I don't have personal experience, but my mom had me at 32 and my brother at 35. Her sisters both had two kids in their 30s and 1 each in their 40s. You're fine.

SchoolPsychSteph · May 2014

I hear you. I'm frustrated that TFAS is taking forever, but I had two unplanned and unexpected pregnancies in the past. DD1 was a surprise in 2007 when DH (then BF) and I were 19, not ready. We started NTNP in2012, but I got back on BC when our "allotted time frame" (bahaha what a joke) was over.

After four months in 2013, we got pregnant with DD2 who we lost this January. Three days before my birthday and exactly five months until my EDD. So I've waited for this baby for much longer than I anticipated. I've learned a lot in the process. It's frustrating, annoying, and gives me a lot of anxiety. At the end of the day, I have to remember I can give it my best shot each month, but it's really out of my control. That is what keeps me going. In the meantime, I find joy knowing I can still drink alcohol.

ETA: DD1 will be 7 in november. I used to joke how our kids would be 10 years apart. It's becoming a reality.

Feeling down

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