Newbie and not sure what to do!

Lild09 · May 2014

Hi ladies I'm a FTM my ds is 15 days old today and here's my issue

He will get these feeds where he's feeding and things are going well then he pulls off and cries a bit so I leave him be to swallow and ill burp him. I out him back on and he gets upset crying shaking his head so I take him off but he's then putting his hand to mouth and moving side to side so I try putting him back on but he's crying shaking his head not wanting to latch. It's so frustrating it's making me cry

Also sometimes he has a really good feed and he comes off content so I burp him and he continues to have a quiet alert time...then not long after he starts with his hand in his mouth again so I try putting him on and he sucks for a bit then just stops and hangs out on my boob or he will pull off and then hand to mouth again! Everything I've read says that's a hunger cue but I'm confused bc he won't eat.

Finally I worry bc he does this outside of his usual fussy times (in the morning from 7-8 am wake up til 11 or 12) then again (evening from 7-8 pm til 11-12) where no matter what we do (or don't do as in leave him alone) he doesn't calm or go to sleep even though he's tired (yawning, half closed eyes). He hates being swaddled bc he loves his arms out too ugh I'm so tired and confused. Any ideas? Thanks so much for listening

TheBorg7of9 · May 2014

I don't know about the fussy times question, but for my kids, a hand in the mouth doesn't always mean hungry. They can also do that for reason at all. If my baby just ate, is clean, but is still fussy, I assume he is tired and needs to be rocked to sleep. Or try a pacifier.

tahloulah10 · May 2014

FTM here, so no expert, but it sounds to me like he wants to comfort suck after a feeding/burping, but is getting upset that milk is coming out. Have you tried to give him a pacifier? It took a few different brands and helping DD hold it in her mouth, but things really improved once she took the paci.

Also, if he's showing hunger cues after a feeding and you've burped him, are you switching breasts? He might still be hungry and need to feed from the other side.

As for the swaddling, my DD really protested it, but it calmed her and help her sleep at night. He may fuss and cry initially, but stick with a nice tight wrap and he should calm down. Hope this helps. Good luck!

ejb23 · May 2014

Hang in there mama! You are doing great! My LO would show hungry signs when she needed to burp too. Not sure if that's what's going on here but might be worth a few extra pats.

opheliainwaders · May 2014

Also, the head-shaking/refusing to latch was, for DD, a sign of gas. Can you try either a longer burping session or gas drops, and see if that helps?

Lild09 · May 2014

I'll try all of your suggestions ladies! I do try to burp him and get some big burps out when he gets that way I'll just need to make sure I do it as soon as he's frustrated

You guys are right and maybe there's another paci he'd like more do far soothie is the one he sort of takes

I don't really offer the other side often but I'll try it next time too to see if that's the case. I get worried bc his one and only huge throw up followed by screaming session was after he took from both breasts

sishamarie · May 2014

Since your baby doesnt like to be swaddled try swaddaling her in your arms, holding close to your body. I like to do it with a blanket too. And gently rock her to sleep. Also at this time decrease stimulation such as a tv and possibly provide white noise or make rhythmic shhhh sounds. My baby also likes when i tell her stories. Babies love the sound of mom's voice. And yes i agree with PP to try the paci. The teal soothies are what my DD likes. Hope this helps.

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