August 2014 Moms

Husbands/S/Os coping

How are your S/Os coping with your pregnancy. Mine: He goes out and buys dangerously sharp things. Like my last pregnancy, he bought a Katana. This actually lead me to have a complete meltdown and hyperventilation attack because it was the same price as a crib. 

This time around he bought a $70 knife and is having a custom sheath for it. Honestly, it will probably end up in the lock box, never to see the light of day, much like the katana (I warned him if I ever saw it, I would sell it on him). 

Anyone else have husbands who need retail therapy of their own to cope with the growing family dynamic? 
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Re: Husbands/S/Os coping

  • My H was buying a ton of booze in the beginning, but now he has pumped the breaks on that, thankfully!
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  • NLewis1NLewis1 member
    My H went the opposite way. While he has never been a "spender" to begin with, he's absolutely more tight fisted now. He hasn't really done or said anything that has made me raise my eyebrows yet....he's a pretty mellow, even tempered guy so I'll be surprised if he does
    Mrs. H
    Crohn's Dx: August 2008
    Endometriosis Dx: May 2010
    Married: 05/19/2012
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  • Not so much retail therapy as much as "let's break sh!t" therapy. The broken pluming was a combined effort of accidents, but rather than just poking a little hole in the wall to fix the break, he took down the whole wall.

    And don't get me started on the garage. There's so much stuff taken apart in there, I can't even park inside!
                    We're Going to be a Family of 5!

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  • My husbands way of coping has been late night out with the boys doing expensive things. His mind set is that he won't be able to do it in a few months so he might as well get it out of his system now. He spent $150 of a single ticket to a Bulls playoff ticket and then spent god know how much going downtown Chicago for a bachelor party. Not my idea of the best use of $$ but he is right .. it wont be happening again for awhile so enjoy it dude :-) 
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  • He bought guns. And now goes to the gun range frequently. He's waiting for the approval papers for his chl. He has become obsessed now.

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  • Spending on yard stuff. He's so worried about making the yard look nice that he won't work on the garage that needs to be finished before we can move ds1 and set up ds2 in there new room. He just keeps saying we have 3 months but that's not a lot when he only has 2 days off a week.
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  • Mine is obsessive about getting his next couple exams done. He's trying to pack a year or more worth of studying and testing into three months. I appreciate that he wants it done by the time the baby gets here but I feel bad for him. I think he's putting too much pressure on himself.
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  • DH isn't really a shopper but he is in the lets spend as much time as a family as 3 as we can so he is trying to do excursions and stuff for us with DD.
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  • My husband is redoing all the crown molding in our house and door frames.. starting with the nursery. It's driving me crazy. I wanted to nap today and I can't because we have a condo and the nursery is right next to our bedroom. There is dust all over the house and we had an earlier shower out of state and all of our gifts are in our stairwell as he tries to finish things up for the next shower. I am trying to be very patient!  
  • RannndiRannndi member
    Ummm...I send DH grocery shopping and on his past 2 excursions he's gone way overboard. The first time he came back with two recliners and shelves for the girls' room. This last trip, he came back with a huge water dispenser, an ice machine, and a fire pit! LOL he's normally super tight too.

    BFP: 12/2/13, EDD: 8/17/13

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  • Where I live, we have a lot of online yard sale groups on Facebook...some on base, some out in town. My husband is constantly tagging me in posts with baby items at reasonable prices which I love. It's a win-win..he's being proactive in the pregnancy and also not spending a butt load of money. We now have (at retail) at least $800 worth of baby stuff, that we've spent about $200. It takes a lot of stress off of me which is a definite win!

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  • Wow! So glad to see this post (and makes me feel better to know that I'm not the only one dealing with hubby splurges). He's been working on the backyard (even though baby room needs to get finished) & so far he's spent over $950 on the baby's room & that doesn't include paint or any furniture... He's a spender & it's hard to say "no" if it's "for the baby's room". C'est la vie.
  • DH hasn't really bought anything more than usual, but he is "hormonal." I find this amusing because he calls out my hormones and attitude. But seriously, yesterday he had a temper tantrum because we were out of orange juice. He refused to take the coffee cake (yeah, I got up early yesterday to make him a sour cream coffee cake for breakfast) out of the oven so I could go get some orange juice. He even said he "wasn't eating whatever is in the oven because it might as well be lunch by the time it is done" (it was done at 9:22). So I didn't leave to get orange juice but waited for the coffee cake. He ate a banana and I ate coffee cake. Then I left to go get orange juice and do other shopping...what had he eaten when I had gone? About half of the coffee cake.

    Long story short...DH's way of coping is to act like a child.

    TTC Since January 2012 Me:37 DH:34      DX July 2013: Unexplained Infertility      New DX Dec 2013: DOR
    BFP#1 6/4/12 EDD 2/13/13 M/C 6/6/12  BFP#2 2/21/13 EDD 11/3/13 M/C 2/26/13 BFP#3 C/P
    4 rounds of clomid, 2 with IUI = BFN
    November/December Retesting/Natural Cycle = Surprise BFP @ 11dpo! Beta#1 76.6@13dpo Beta #2 276@15dpo u/s#1 6w2d hb113 u/s#2 8w2d, measuring 8w4d hb168! 10w2d hb171 12w3d Verifi results are in and good! EDD 8/23 Our Baby Girl Rainbow Baby born 8/20/2014!!!
    Um...what? BFP 11/2/15!?! EDD 7/4/16
  • WynWyn member
    God bless my hubby. He is coping by getting frisky--and that makes me feel better about being huge.
  • jendem8jendem8 member
    My husband has become determined to make as much money as possible by trying to teach extra online classes and getting his side business more traction.  Last night (after he had several drinks) he went into this cute tangent about how she is "only going to have the best."  It was really sweet, but I don't want him to overly stress himself out.  I also informed him that we will not be spoiling her, but it seems that she has him already wrapped around her finger.
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  • My DH has dragged out getting to maintenance or home improvement stuff. Yesterday we finally got the nursery painted, installed a closet system, and can now assemble the crib and start actually putting the baby stuff in the baby's room. He told me that we look like hoarders b/c all the baby stuff has relocated to the dining room while the transformation has been occurring. It's gotta go somewhere!!

    He hasn't been a huge spender, but did buy and install himself a new toilet, picked up a new xbox one, and is talking of getting a new gun in the next couple of weeks.
    He is a private pilot and I think he goes flying and to his flight clubs weekly to cope. He says he will go flying to get away from diapers and crying babies but I think once his little wing man comes, he'll be grounded a little bit to spend time with our lil guy.
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  • @Wyn‌ - Exactly what I'm dealing with. I'm waiting for him to just start humping my leg when I'm making dinner.....which I guess is better than spending a bunch of money we don't have. Does make me feel better about the weight gain though.
  • Mine went out and got a second job out of pure freak-out-ed-ness over finances. 

    He's currently filled out the financial paperwork for the student loans so he can complete his Masters.  Of course, he's going for a double Masters (Public Administration and Criminal Justice).

    He's also talking about running for Constable for our precinct (he's LE)

    He's all OVER the damn place. 

    He's not TOOOO bad about spending; unless it comes to motorcycle trips.  I'm actually starting to put my foot down about those since he and I can't even afford to go anywhere. 
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    Proud Mother to 16 year old Austin (MCJROTC Sgt., Trumpet playing "Band Nerd" and hopeful Air Force Pilot!)
    Proud Stepmother to 12 year old Josh (Baseball playing, Saxophone playing "Band Nerd" and hopeful Doctor!)
    Proud Mother to baby Kaylee (Stuffed toy playing, Adorable smiling baby and hopeful Rodeo Princess!)

     
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