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October 2013 Moms
dovetail223
member
Re-intro and Apology
dovetail223
member
Hello oct 2013 moms!
I am re-intro-ing in a new thread since my SN is different than the original one I intro'd with.
Background: My old SN was MrEdVag and I posted a very insensitive UO about memorial stickers on cars a long time ago (sometime in our second tri). I apologized at the time, and I am apologizing again. I stopped actively participating after that mostly because I was embarrassed and didn't really see a way to move past it. I'm hoping that I can start fresh since I have still actively lurked and have learned a lot from all you ladies.
Brief birth story: I have a pretty high stress job which caused my blood pressure to be elevated at the end of the pregnancy. After a failed induction, my water breaking, and a long long labor, I gave birth to my daughter Evelyn on Oct 3rd. She was 6 lbs 13 oz and despite some initial bumps has been thriving since we left the hospital.
Since birth: I went back to work at 4 weeks pp and it was challenging. Fortunately DH and I are a good team and we really haven't had too many issues managing the hectic schedule. We bought our first house and are closing next thursday! So I'm really excited about that.
I hope to participate in this board in a more constructive way than my first attempt. I'm including some pictures of DD for your time. Thanks!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Re-intro and Apology
Cute baby!
#2 due 12.23.17
Yesterday I was in a Dunkin donuts drive thru, getting decaf, and the SUV in front of me had a stick figure family on the right back window. On the left side back window it said 'In loving memory of our son Nicolas, date,' and a BABY stick person under that. I don't even feel sorry for her for losing a kid...since she wants TOTAL strangers to know her buisness like that. WTF
Edited for mobile fluckery"
#2 due 12.23.17
With that I do give respect for saying you were that person and coming back since you could have not said anything. And I hope that it does not get associated with you each post.
May Siggy: Baby in disguise
*spelling is hard with fat thumbs
Some of us are open to the idea that you may have positive contributions even if you once offended others.
Others will be reluctant to let you apologize or correct yourself or explain what you meant. Just move past them.
She apologized. What more do you want from her?
I don't want to put words in her mouth but I think the main point she was making was how shocked she was to see that on someone's car. If you are a private person, it could be pretty jarring to see something so personal made so public. And maybe the shock of it overshadowed what would have been a sympathetic response to learning about someone's loss. I'm just speculating. I'm not saying it's ok or right or whatever, but she apologized.
If you want to ignore someone, then do it. No need for the "I still hate this person and this is why you should too" posts. Move on.
#2 due 12.23.17
#2 due 12.23.17
I still dislike LCNumbers for that old bullshit, but I have been able to blow it off. However, as a mother who has dealt with a loss and even more so for the other loss mothers on this board, I will also be using the ignore feature.
It may seem odd to someone the way people grieve or memorialize loss, but it is one of those things that should be kept to yourself. I am a forgive and forget person, but I guarantee I will never, ever forgive the girl that told me she was glad my babies died. You just don't go there. Granted this wasn't THAT bad, but was still awful.
My best friend was pregnant with quadruplets and lost one shortly after they were all born, at 23 weeks. She has the stick figures on the back of her van, including a little angel baby to memorialize K. I think it's precious and a way for her family to recognize and remember K in their own special way. The fact that something like that annoys you makes me -- well, I'm not sure how that makes me feel. Surprised, shocked...and sorry for you.
Hopefully, as a mother, you can search within yourself and figure out why that pissed you off so much and learn to be a little (a lot) more understanding in the future.
P.S. You caught me on a morning after a full night's sleep, so I'm trying to be kind and allow this to be a teaching moment. That said, I do not suggest pulling that kind of insensitive, offensive shit here again.