It finally happened warning living children mentioned

TeamWinForever · May 2014

I saw my first Facebook pregnancy announcement. This women is not a close friend, however her husband is close with my husband. We had NO idea that they were even trying, and they often complain about money related issues, so this really came out of the blue. It felt like a throat punch or like someone dumped a bucket of cold water on my head. In turn, I quickly unfollowed her and spent the rest of the night in bed irrationally sobbing. I guess I'm venting here because even my hubby doesn't get why I'm upset. His words were "you know people are still going to get pregnant, right?" To compound all of this hurt, my daughters third birthday party is tomorrow and they are attending with their son. As awful as this sounds, I don't want her to come. She's not a very sensitive person, so I don't think she will go out of her way to not bring up her pregnancy. Quite the opposite in fact. Yet, I can't uninvite them. That would be equally horrible. Ugh...it just makes me so mad that I have to be the bigger person here. I wish you ladies could reassure me that these things get easier to deal with, but I'm not so sure that's the case. In any event, thanks for letting me be this out.

ikrystal · May 2014

I'm sorry you are dealing with this. It is never easy spending time with people who are joyful over their pregnancies while you are grieving. You're right, uninviting her would be just as bad as hearing about her pregnancy in person. There's no easy way to solve this problem... I don't even think there is a way to solve it, period. I wish there was. I spent a lot of time dodging people who were pregnant, not because I didn't care for them or love them, but as a survival strategy. I hope that there are enough people at the party so that you won't have to spend a lot of time hearing about her talk about her pregnancy.

junebugjam · May 2014

I'm so sorry. A good friend of mine at work just told me about her pregnancy last weekend. She tried to be sensitive about it, and I knew they were trying, but it's still hard. The worst was that she said to me "I wanted to wait till 13 weeks when I knew everything was good." I wanted to scream. I waited to tell until 13 weeks also and everything wasn't "good" anyway.

I'd just try to keep distance from her as much as possible.

TeamWinForever · May 2014

Thanks ladies. It's nice to know that I am not in fact irrational or crazy. There should be a decent amount of people there tomorrow, a lot of family included, so hopefully, I can simply say hello to her and keep my distance. I so wish this didn't have to be so hard.

shandorfml2 · May 2014

Thats always hard, especially the first one. (((Hugs))). Feel free to tell her you dont want to talk about her pregnancy because its to hard for you

stefuge · May 2014

I'm so sorry - it is so hard to see and hear those announcements. ((Hugs))

mmsweeney1 · May 2014

Hugs to you. It was always so hard for me to see other people announcing and my husband didn't get it either. I hope you are able to enjoy your party tomorrow!

Jellybean71514 · May 2014

So sorry you need to deal with this, it's always hard to hear about pregnancies but hoping you can push through and enjoy the party tomorrow xo

jonahsma · May 2014

I am sorry, its always so hard to be around pregnant women /newborns. hugs

TeamWinForever · May 2014

Thank you everyone for the kind words and support. We had a wonderful party and day, and this person ended up being a no-show, which was fine by me. I feel like I dodged a bullet this time, but still need to figure out a way to not be so bitter and resentful.

kflynn81 · May 2014

shandorfml2 said:

Thats always hard, especially the first one. (((Hugs))). Feel free to tell her you dont want to talk about her pregnancy because its to hard for you

I agree with this and there isn't anything wrong with being honest about it...its difficult and hopefully she will understand it. For the first time the other day I said outloud to someone "I don't have to explain myself" and left it at that.... it felt sooooo good.

bunnybun4 · May 2014

sorry you had to deal with that...let me echo pp's and say that it is totally normal. I've had my full fair share of crying all day or being super pissed after hearing someone is ku.

for the most part, when I am finally forced to be around the pregnant person it isn't as bad as I thought.

((hugs))

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