MIL Update

ohdaddycat · May 2014

So DH got off work and hour early to try and take care of this mess at the police station. At first they were giving us the run around because the texts we had weren't "that bad", and we would have to go downtown. Luckily for me since I hadn't fully taken care of blocking her just yet I got a nice little message from her that really helped. They put out something called a warrant for intimidation which I have never heard of. Plus he told us to still go downtown to get a PPO. Whatever helps.

*Image removed by moderator for personal information*

ohdaddycat · May 2014

Sidebar: I make my DH two lunches everyday cause he works 12 hours a day. I'm in no way lazy. Yes I get tired and take naps when my two year old does, but that's because I'm PREGNANT.

MrsL2B · May 2014

I'm glad they took you seriously. Has her behavior gotten worse recently in areas that don't have anything to do with you? This sample makes her seem like she could use some psychiatric help.

Sockgnome78 · May 2014

Glad to hear they took you seriously. Just keep doing what you are doing and know that you are a good mom.

MrMrsandBaby · May 2014

amcclindon said:

This is so outrageous....I don't think I've ever hated a complete stranger before. I am so sorry this is happening. I think you should change your #.

This...exactly. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this. I will never understand how someone can have so much hate in their heart. It must be exhausting.

SkyeRN · May 2014

I will never be able to understand how someone could treat another human being this way. Let alone, the mother of her grandchild, the wife of her SON! She is obviously a very sick person and I can only hope for her that she gets the help that she needs to get better..... BEFORE she completely writes herself out of your lives, if she hasn't already done so. I'm SO sorry you are dealing with this right now.....
ETA: spelling - damn autocorrect......

trisharenee0316 · May 2014

She is an absolutely repulsive "human being." I'm looking forward to the follow up where she gets what she richly deserves--other than a throat punch.

lrobi13 · May 2014

I am so sorry. There are no words.

archi35 · May 2014

Late to the party (as usual) so I didn't get to see the pics while they were up - but I'm so sorry for this stress on top of having your LO and being pregnant! It sounds like you're doing everything you can and as with PP I'm horrified that someone is so ugly and vulgar to you and your family. Big hugs and support!

crystal8503 · May 2014

@ohdaddycat‌, I'm sorry you are being treated so poorly by such a horrible excuse for a person. I hope you are able to distance yourself fun her quickly and can rid that toxin from tour life for good.

Also, you have a pm.

bumpuser10309732 · May 2014

@ohdaddycat Please don't feel the need to defend yourself to us. None of us think you're lazy and we all have your back :-)

Also she sounds like she genuinely has some sort of mental disorder. Scary for you and the kids! I hope that she gets her shit under control and you don't have to deal with her anymore!

trisharenee0316 · May 2014

@Jalara48 - I didn't look too closely at the image when it was posted--mostly just enough to see the hateful things the OP's MIL wrote to her. So I don't know 100% if her phone number was posted, but I didn't see it. But I was curious to know what kind of personal information was in the picture/what kind of personal information we have to avoid posting so posts or pics aren't removed.

wildflower75 · May 2014

I'm glad they were able to help you! Hopefully she will leave you in peace!

crystal8503 · May 2014

jalara48 said:

trisharenee0316 said:

@Jalara48 - I didn't look too closely at the image when it was posted--mostly just enough to see the hateful things the OP's MIL wrote to her. So I don't know 100% if her phone number was posted, but I didn't see it. But I was curious to know what kind of personal information was in the picture/what kind of personal information we have to avoid posting so posts or pics aren't removed.

Do not post identifying information on the boards.

What identifiable information was posted by the OP? ETA- you didn't answer @trisharenee0316.

trisharenee0316 · May 2014

I guess my question is, I didn't see anything that was identifying (in terms of names, phone numbers, etc.), so is there a standard for what is "identifying information?"

@starla487 - If the OP plans to use the texts as evidence against her MIL, that's her business. That doesn't make it identifying by any stretch of the definition of the word because there are a bazillion protective orders issued daily. We still have no idea who the MIL or OP are.

meggiev123 · May 2014

I still can't believe there are people this crazy in the world. So sorry you are having to deal with this bitch. Big hugs!

trisharenee0316 · May 2014

I thought I said above why I wanted to know, which is to know what is considered identifying information. Like I mentioned, I didn't see names or phone numbers (other than the OP's husband's name, but people put their kids and/or spouse's names on TB all the time and that has never been considered identifying info), so as a member of TB and this community, I feel like we all have the right to know what the standards are so our posts aren't edited or removed, and so that we aren't breaking the rules of the boards, even if unintentional. Questioning my motives for asking only opens you up to questions on your motives for deleting portions of people's posts, and since I'm sure you wouldn't want that, you should give others the same respect. Saying that you won't tell people the types of information that could be considered identifying seems like a cop out, IMO.

I don't care necessarily about this case, but my impression was that identifying info was contact information or something specific enough to "out" a person (e.g., if I said that you, for example, worked at "a well known animation studio that created movies such as Cinderella and The Little Mermaid," that doesn't give the name of your workplace, but does give enough information to identify your workplace).

ohdaddycat · May 2014

@Jalara48 we have just gotten home from the court. A sheriff will deliver the PPO to her home in 5 business days. I am happy it's finally over. Just upset because it cost so much for them to deliver it, and DH will have to work on our lazy day in order to make up for today.

golfingdarwinfish · May 2014

trisharenee0316 said:

I thought I said above why I wanted to know, which is to know what is considered identifying information. Like I mentioned, I didn't see names or phone numbers (other than the OP's husband's name, but people put their kids and/or spouse's names on TB all the time and that has never been considered identifying info), so as a member of TB and this community, I feel like we all have the right to know what the standards are so our posts aren't edited or removed, and so that we aren't breaking the rules of the boards, even if unintentional. Questioning my motives for asking only opens you up to questions on your motives for deleting portions of people's posts, and since I'm sure you wouldn't want that, you should give others the same respect. Saying that you won't tell people the types of information that could be considered identifying seems like a cop out, IMO.

I don't care necessarily about this case, but my impression was that identifying info was contact information or something specific enough to "out" a person (e.g., if I said that you, for example, worked at "a well known animation studio that created movies such as Cinderella and The Little Mermaid," that doesn't give the name of your workplace, but does give enough information to identify your workplace).

I thought the terms leave room for us to share our own information....

"No collecting, storing or posting another members' personal information, under any circumstance.

Regardless of what was shared by another member, you may not repost any "real" names, photos or any other identifying information."

@jalara48

Where does it say we cannot share our own information? When I left TB post loss I signed my final post with my real first name and, to the best of my knowledge, that was not a violation. Now I'm curious if I inadvertently violated the TOU! :-??

atraveller · May 2014

I find it so hard to believe someone would treat anyone like this, more or less someone who is family. She does sound a bit unstable. Sorry for all of your stress - hopefully now that the police are involved that will help.

crystal8503 · May 2014

How hard is it to just say it was a name or phone nember? I hope you take your paying job at least half as seriously as you take this volunteer position. I think your evasiveness is a bit over the top here.

crystal8503 · May 2014

jalara48 said:

crystal8503 said:

How hard is it to just say it was a name or phone nember? I hope you take your paying job at least half as seriously as you take this volunteer position. I think your evasiveness is a bit over the top here.

Stop now please. I do not appreciate being attacked for doing what I am required to. Your approval isn't really needed here, and the attitude is a bit much.

I think your energy would be much better served showing support for the OP and what she's going through than harassing me.

Harassment? Seriously? I didn't realize we couldn't ask questions here without being accused of being harassed. Are there any other rules I should be aware of? Any recent ones since you took office? I'd hate to think I could be unintentionally breaking any additional rules.

trisharenee0316 · May 2014

jalara48 said:
No, personal information is supposed to stay personal. What you share privately between members it completely up to you though. Although some members do share their own names, which you can do, you can not share the names of other people or the private information of other people. And there is some information you can not share, such as your IP address, or office/home address or anything someone can use to track you down.

But this is the part where I am asking for clarification too. People share the names of their children all the time. You could probably look through any thread and see numerous instances of that. People have usernames which include their name and the name of their spouse. People have posted what their spouses do for a living. Etc. Per the bolded above, those would all be considered TOS violations, but they've been seemingly acceptable on these boards . . . pretty much forever (and certainly at least going back to my days on TK which seem like forever ago, starting around 2005).

The confusion really stems from the fact that it seems like enforcement on this board is different from the standards of other boards of TB, TN, or TK, and that's why I'm looking for clarity here as to what constitutes identifying information, aside from the obvious ones that have been mentioned on TB before, such as the real name of another poster (who hasn't disclosed it in her username), contact information such as an address or phone number, or revealing workplace information about another poster. If you want to say that there's no hard and fast rule and that you will be the final determinator of what constitutes identifying information, that's fine and I suppose that's up to you as a moderator. But I wish that would just be said instead of feeling like it has to be a battle to find out the information. After all, I'd think it would make your job easier if people just knew right off the bat what was and was not allowed!

And just to be clear again, I am NOT asking what happened in OP's case or why her pic was removed. I am asking for general guidelines.

crystal8503 · May 2014

jalara48 said:

crystal8503 said:

jalara48 said:

crystal8503 said:

How hard is it to just say it was a name or phone nember? I hope you take your paying job at least half as seriously as you take this volunteer position. I think your evasiveness is a bit over the top here.

Stop now please. I do not appreciate being attacked for doing what I am required to. Your approval isn't really needed here, and the attitude is a bit much.

I think your energy would be much better served showing support for the OP and what she's going through than harassing me.
Harassment? Seriously? I didn't realize we couldn't ask questions here without being accused of being harassed. Are there any other rules I should be aware of? Any recent ones since you took office? I'd hate to think I could be unintentionally breaking any additional rules.

Seriously. Stop.

You have asked your questions and they have been answered to the extent that they are going to be. You are not getting the details of someone else's removed information because it is none of your business and you are not entitled to that information. You know where the rules are and you know to err on the side of of caution when posting personal information.

Stop pressing for someone else's post information or you will receive a warning. I have already explained that once information has been removed for privacy reasons it is no longer for public consumption - any details of it.

Stop.

Well aren't you the best little mod we ever could have gotten. I especially love how you're even trying to overstep into the Facebook world. You certainly take the cake for all the mods I've ever interacted with on TB and TK. Also, you won't be breaking my heart with a warning, so no need to worry there.

crystal8503 · May 2014

:-@

Want a personalized experience?

MIL Update

Re: MIL Update

Choose Another Board

Search Boards