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Working Moms
The one thing I never understand
(as the flames get fanned higher LOL).
I *know* being a SAHM is hard. Very hard. I personally would probably lose my mind. But I hate how the defense is always "but I cook and clean and run the house", etc.
Ummmm I do that too, AND work. We don't have a maid, cook, etc. We have a very tight budget, don't splurge on fancy cars, fancy vacations, etc. It's just me and my DH, no family in the area, etc to help out when we get sick. Or if our DD gets sick one of us has to stay home with her and take time off work/school/teaching.
I know there is no such thing as a woman of leisure (well unless your name is Paris Hilton) but I feel like working moms get made to feel like crap for saying we enjoy our jobs, etc.
My two PCOS miracles!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: The one thing I never understand
I read some of those posts and thought the same thing. It's not like magic fairies clean my house while I'm at work.
I also can't stand it when people say it's the hardest job there is, because it's just not. There are many jobs that are much, much harder.
Work expands to take the time allotted to fill it. So if you work 40 hours/week, raise a child, and maintain a household and a marriage you're a very busy woman. But not as much as someone who does all that AND goes to school part-time, and far, far busier than someone who doesn't work at all.
But all 3 women would almost certainly call themselves very busy. And I imagine people who are financially dependent look for ways to justify that.
Couldn't agree more. I find the time to do all the grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc, along with working a full time job and a husband that is in school 40+ hours a week. I don't think there is anything wrong with SAH, but don't make working mothers feel bad because they enjoy their job or have to in order to make ends meet.
Oh, don't get me started! I was laid off before Thanksgiving and was discussing this with someone at Tday dinner. I said that I was enjoying some downtime b/c "it's so exhausting." My BIL chirps up wanting to know what is so exhausting b/c, apparently, I implied that SAH with my kids was going to be so much easier (SIL SAH). I said nothing of the sort!
But, you know what, it is easier FOR ME to stay home with them and do everything than it is to work FT, parent them and get everything else done. Yeah, we have some bad days, but for the most part, my life is so much calmer and less stressful right now. And, I still can't wait to get back to work.
That's what really bugs me about those comments too. Like we all come home to sparkling clean houses with dinner on the table and laundry folded and sit on our butts all evening, and the only reason we work is to buy designer bags and expensive cars.
I don't get what was wrong with the OP that got their panties all in a bunch anyway. I mean, who wouldn't want to be a woman or a man of leisure? That doesn't mean that's what all SAHM's are, but immediately a bunch of them went on the defensive over it.
I think you're all nuts - SAH is freakin EASY!!! I just quit my job to take some time off, and this is seriously the easiest and least stressed I've ever been in my life. My main concern each day is what room should I clean, and what to make for dinner. And I take three hours to cook dinner if I want, not a mad rush to throw something together so we all eat before 8pm.
I totally understand that not everyone wants to SAH...honestly if this was all that was to my life for the next 10 years I'd get seriously depressed. But I'm going to enjoy while I can.
The thing I don't get is - why would you struggle so much to be a SAHM that you have to spend your free time doing survey on the internet for extra cash? And finding crappy WAH scam-jobs? How does your child benefit from Mommy doing crap like that?
Of course this is my biased and likely snobby opinion. I am just saying...........
I am a SAHM and have TREMENDOUS respect for working moms! I do realize all that you do on top of working full time. I absolutely HATE all this mom bashing, and just want to apologize for others making assumptions about working moms being bad moms. Not all SAHMs are judgmental, I promise!
It's been said a million times, but I'll say it again: every parent does what is best for their family. Who has the energy to worry about the choices other moms make?
There was a thread on the nest's Getting Pregnant board that was about SAHM/WOHM, and one girl actually stated that it didn't really make financial sense for most mothers to work outside the home once you figured in the costs of lunches out, gas money, work clothes, and a maid.
I had to pick my jaw up off the floor. Uh, I brownbag my lunch, certainly don't wear designer clothes, and sure as hell don't have a maid.
I do all of the things that a SAHM does, only I do it in the evenings and on my weekends. And if you think that cleaning your house and running errands is the equivalent of a 40 hour/week job, you're delusional and trying mighty hard to justify your position.