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February 2014 Moms
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why doesn't LO like to be held? :(

kak808kak808 member
in February 2014 Moms
LO has despised being held since she was just a few weeks old. If she's in a good mood, I can get away with putting her up on my shoulder for a bit. She'll also put up with my holding her facing out a bit, but that's it. I can never sit and hold her and even when she humors me and let's me hold her a little, it's clear she'd rather be in the swing or just laying on her back. Occasionally, if she's asleep I can pick her up and she'll keep sleeping. I just tried that now, but she started screaming when I took her out the swing. I tried to calm her down for about 15 minutes...and then I put her back in the swing and sat down in front of it and cried :(  I feel like she'll look at me from the swing, ground, etc., like "why am I here?" but she's almost always unhappy (i.e. fussing/crying) when I try to hold her. Anyone else have an LO like this?  Or maybe STMs have had an LO like this in the past?  Will she ever grow out of this or is this just how she is??  I'd say she puts up with others holding her a little better than she does with me, but she's still definitely not a fan.
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Re: why doesn't LO like to be held? :(

  • SuzyQq02SuzyQq02 member
    My LO's not much of a cuddler, either. She likes sitting on my lap facing out, or sitting up in the crook of MH's arm, but doesn't really like to be held in a traditional cradled way unless she's BFing. I call her Nosy Rosie, she always wants to be looking around and seeing what's going on!
    Suzy & Brian November 3, 2007 "...this one time, at band camp..." ;-)
    TTC #1 since 9/2012
    BFP #1 2/16/13, EDD 10/13/13, CP 2/21/13
    BFP #2 6/2/13
    Baby J-Bug 2/8/14 My Wedding Bio from back in the day
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  • halfthetree halfthetree member
    Every baby is different, but if it was my baby I would take her to the chiropractor and get her checked out. They don't "crack" babies, so don't worry about that:)
    My sons birth was long and traumatic, he needed a good 4-5 Chiro sessions afterwards before he was aligned and not upset when I held him a certain way.
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  • MissDemeanorMissDemeanor member
    Do you ever wear her in a Moby, Ergo, or whatever? How does she feel about that?
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  • CodypupCodypup member
    Same as others have posted. We never cuddle quietly on the couch. LOL I just snorted typing that, because LO would flip her shit if I tried. We do "kneesies" where she's propped up on my knees looking at me, "standies," where she stands and looks around, or I hold her facing outwards. She really doesn't like being up on my shoulder.

    The only time she'll chill quietly is if I'm in the rocking chair on the porch, because she's busy looking around at the trees and crap, and she likes the motion of the chair. She also needs to be held close when she's falling asleep, but that's with a bouncing/walking/shushing combo situation.

    OP, does any of that kind of sound familiar? I hope you don't have these images of us snuggling quietly and peacefully all day long, because I don't think that's realistic.
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  • kak808kak808 member
    Ok I feel a little better now. I didn't think I was being unrealistic in my expectations, but maybe I was? I guess I don't really know any better. I just assumed there would be some quiet snuggling and that if she were upset I could comfort her by holding her, which I can't -- only the swing does that. However, I still think LO's behavior is a bit extreme -- MIL always goes on and on about how LO is so weird for not liking to be held.

    Let's see: yes I BF (I thought that could be part of the problem), no I don't wear perfume (I don't think I saw that Scrubs episode!), and LO has let me wear her once. To be fair I haven't tried that many times, but it usually ends in screaming. We do "kneesies" sometimes as well as the gopher hold :)
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  • ScaredOfCatsScaredOfCats member
    I'm with the others. LO has to be in motion to be happy being held. Sometimes I can get away with him in my lap facing forward, but not often. He's generally content for 5-10 minutes after being fed, but then needs to move.
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  • spicysurrospicysurro member
    Agree with everyone else. My LO doesnt not sit and snuggle. Even when trying to put her to sleep in the swaddle she is fussy and grouchy because swaddled. She hates to be cradled too. Unless shes over the shoulder or outward facing, there is zero chance of her being happy. 

    She does and will love you, please don't beat yourself up! 
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  • LetoileDuNordLetoileDuNord member
    It's a relief to me too! LO needs motion, Ergo, looking around, or a pacifier in order to not freak his face while snuggling.
     
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