Will someone please tell me that this gets easier?
Me: 31 | DH: 37 Married January 12, 2013 TTC since July 2013 Fertility Treatments January 2014 - June 2015 Took a break to prepare for IVF Surprise BFP - September 2015 - MMC at 6 weeks, 5 days Another surprise BFP - November 2015 - EDD: July 8th!
So sorry . I'm not going to lie, so I can't tell you that it gets easier. I'm sorry. I thought that I was so used to BFNs that it wouldn't be so bad the next time...wrong. Do what you need to do to take care of yourself.
Me: 30 DW (aka C): 29
Together since 2/15/11 ~ Legally married in NY on 9/29/12
***CP mentioned***
We've been working on baby #1 since July 2013 using Open ID donor sperm. 8 IUI attempts with 5 actual IUIs and one chemical pregnancy. We have one fresh IVF cycle under our belts as well as a FET. I have endometriosis and a uterine septum that was corrected via surgery in November 2013.
11/14/14 - Second HSG shows that tubes are still clear and ute is looking good.
12/6/14 - Started BCPs in prep for IVF #2
12/22/14 - Saline u/s and endometrial scratch (All was clear and OUCH!)
1/2/15 - Began stimming for IVF #2
****All Welcome!****
We are Mommas to four fur babies - 3 dogs and 1 cat.
I have 4 Failed IUIs, statistically speaking I haven't got a shot in hell the next two will work, but I have to complete them for insurance purposes to be approved for IVF. My new mind set is that I will assume it is negative until told otherwise...I'm not getting my hopes up anymore. My second failed IUI I took the hardest. I'm not sure it gets easier, but I may have learned better cooping mechanisms since I don't seem to cry with the negatives anymore.
*** SIGGY WARNING ***
Happily Married Since 10.2006 • TTC since 07.2012
HSG Good & SA mostly Normal • DX lean PCOS
MAR - NOV 2013 • 5 Cycles Clomid + TI = 2 Late O's/BFN & 3 Big Fat FAILS
DEC 2013 - FEB 2014 • IUI #1-3 • Femara 5mg + Trigger = 3 BFNs
so sorry MrsPloehn . This is indeed such a friggin hard journey & to be honest I am really really tired of being told to be positive, its just too hard when the BFN hits.
I found out yesterday that DH's sperm should be frozen because dialysis can affect sperm count so we should keep some aside for the IVF scheduled for July, my therapy = 2 Chocolate Panna Cottas from my favorite Italian restaurant. You have to do whatever you need to take care of yourself and cope! Hang in there & take care of yourselves...
DH : 36, has Chronic Kidney Disease, on dialysis & is waiting on the transplant list (average wait for B+ is 5 years)
Me: 36, Hypothyroidism, PCOS, BMI 32, need to be done with "child bearing" ASAP so that I can be a Kidney donor (was fun realizing we didn't as much time as we thought :-/ )
We're TTC#1
IUI #1 : 5mcg Letrozole (CD 3-7) + Ovidrel Trigger + Had the one follicle = BFN (March 2014)
IUI #2 : 5mcg Letrozole (CD 3-7) + 150 iu Bravelle on CD9 (after much begging!) + Had the one follicle = BFN (April 2014)
7th May 2014 - changed REs, this one seems to care (we think....)
IUI #3 : 7mcg Letrozole (CD 3- 7) + 75 iu Bravelle (CD 8-12) + CD12 Scan 5/16 + Had 3 follicles (2 under 15mm) = BFN(May 2014)
IUI #4 : 7mcg Letrozole (CD 3- 7) + 75 iu Bravelle (CD 8-12) + CD12 Scan 5/16 + Had 1 follicle + DH gave best sample so far = BFN(June 2014)
IVF#1 - ER Only Cycle Sept-Oct 2014, 17 eggs Retrieved, 14 mature, 10 fertilized, 6 made it to Blast & post PGS 5 were not viable due to chromosomal abnormalities Not sure where we go from here...
We're parents to two very adorable, bratty, affectionate & goofy Bernese Mountain Dog pups who would very much like a 2 legged baby brother or sister of their own!
So sorry. For me it does not get easier. Each cycle I think that it might, but even when I am expecting the BFN phone call I still break down. Take some time to be extra nice to yourself these next couple of days.
Married 12/4/12
Began TTC 11/2012
Diagnosed as anovulatory 7/2013
Round #1 Clomid 50 mg 8/2013= BFN
Round#2 Clomid 50 mg 9/2013=BFN
First appointment with RE 9/27/2013
HSG showed left tube completely blocked, diagnosed with hypothyroid and began 50 mcg Synthroid, Vitamin D level low and began 2000 iu Vitamin D, Hubby's SA showed "super sperm" according to RE
I'm so sorry. For me, the pain of a really tough BFN lasts long enough to warn me away from getting hopes up the next cycle, but by the next one I usually start getting optimistic and then it's a very painful rude awakening again. So, maybe next one will not be as bad as this? Of course hopefully you won't even have to worry about that.
January 3T Siggy Challenge - New Year's Resolutions
Me (29), DH (30) TTC actively 54 55+ cycles | All BFNs
Slowly rising betas - Ectopic suspected on 8/8/14 & confirmed on 8/11/14
Methotrexate on 8/12/14 -HCG negative on 9/2/14
IVF #1- November- Antagonist protocol: 11/1: start stims, 200iu of Follistim; 11/12 ER 17R/14M/14F; 11/17 5 day transfer of two blasts, 2 blasts and 2 expanding morulas frozen; 11/22 BFP!! (On FRER at 5dp5dt)
Betas: 9dp5dt 205, 11dp5dt 497, 14dp5dt 1,709
u/s at 5w0d- 1 sac; u/s at 6w0d 1 baby with heartbeat, another sac without a heartbeat
I just don't test anymore. I'm not going to test again until I have a real reason to, like I'm going to a procedure that requires medications or my stomach is suddenly growing. LOL, but seriously. I limit myself to once a month testing or less and I only do it if I'm convinced in my head that it will be negative. If I have any hopes bubbling up, I won't test. I can't handle it otherwise.
I realize how messed up that sounds, but I just can't take the disappointment. I almost never thing it's going to be positive anymore anyway. I'm not even ovulating.
Love 2010 | Marriage 2011 | TTC #1 since 2012 PCOS | Anovulatory | Metformin + Letrozole
Oof. I think I have recovered a bit. I knew as soon as I heard the nurse's voice that it was negative. I haven't cried that hard in awhile.
I wavered back and forth between being convinced I was pregnant and convinced I was not for the past two weeks. I have never had "normal" cycles, so I am assuming the "symptoms" I was having were just hormonal fluctuations from my cycle and the meds. At least I will be better prepared for that next round.
I told DH to pick up a Cherry Dilly bar on his way home. He walked in the door with flowers and a whole box. Love him.
Thank you all so much for your posts! I am sending internet hugs and positive feelings to everyone today!
Me: 31 | DH: 37 Married January 12, 2013 TTC since July 2013 Fertility Treatments January 2014 - June 2015 Took a break to prepare for IVF Surprise BFP - September 2015 - MMC at 6 weeks, 5 days Another surprise BFP - November 2015 - EDD: July 8th!
Married 8/6/2011
Me (26) DH (33)
SA normal,HSG clear
TTC since August 2011
7/2012 50mg Clomid+Trigger+IUI+progesterone =BFN
8/2012 100mg Clomid+estrogen+Trigger+IUI+progestrone=BFN
10/2012 100mg clomid+Gonal+Lupron+Trigger+Progestrone+IUI=BFP but ectopic.
Not trying Not preventing since 2011 Me: Ovulate on my own (but poorly) DH: Low count and poor motility Oct 2013 Uterine polyp removed Feb 2014 First round Ferama, trigger and IUI...BFN March 2014 Second round Ferama, trigger and iui Waiting....
I'm sorry about your BFN. I'd be lying if I said it gets easier, unfortunately. It is a very difficult journey for sure. Just be kind to yourself!
Me: 32 DH: 33 Married: March 2004
July 2006: started TTC 2008: HSG (normal), couple rounds of clomid through gyno 2008 - 2010:dragging my feet out of fear and procrastination October 2010: first consultation with RE, dx PCOS and fibroids (DH slightly low count/motility) Oct. 2010 - Dec. 2012: In DENIAL! avoided the issuebecause I was scared of surgery January 2013: returned to RE, fibroids grew significantly February 2013: second HSG, fibroids pushed on tubes which blocked them somewhat March 2013: MRI to determine what type of surgery may be necessary July 29, 2013: fibroids (5) removed via robotic laparascopy August 2013 - Nov 2013 : benched due to recent surgery
IUI #1, Dec. 24, 2013, BFN
IUI #2, Jan. 25, 2014, BFN IUI #3, Feb. 25, 2014BFN IUI #4 canceled due to lack of response to letrozole IUI #4.1April 28, 2014, BFN May 16, 2014:wtf consult, start prepping for IVF in June and add injects for one last IUI in the meantime IUI #5 started letrozole and bravelle but canceled after HSG led to new diagnosis May 21, 2014: third HSG, tubes blocked, one at the beginning, one hydrosalpinx??
June 11, 2014: consult, approved to move on to IVF because the hydro is not completely blockedtherefore allowing fluid to move through slowly rather than backwards IVF #1 August 8, 2014 - 3dt of 2 embryos, BFN September 17, 2014 - 4th HSG, the right tube is very patent (open!!) dye went straight through this time. Weird! October 2, 2014 - started metformin treatment November 14, 2014 - blood work, brought A1C down from 5.8 to 5.5 November 26, 2014 - RE finally back from vaca and reviewed my chart, no more IVFs for rest of calendar year December 1, 2014 - Right after Thanksgiving, I called a new clinic and got in right away! Plan for IVF December 17, 2014 - ER! 29 retrieved (!!), 16 mature, all 16 fertilized (ICSI) IVF #2 December 20, 2014 - 3dt of 3 embryos, BFN
so sorry for you For me it only seems to get worse. every time i try not to get my hopes up it never works and the dissappointment is overwhelming. Doesn't matter how much i disstract myself, it never gets easier. I just went through my first IUI and this one has definatly hit me the hardest so far! infertility sucks!!
Re: Got the call.
Me: 30 DW (aka C): 29
Together since 2/15/11 ~ Legally married in NY on 9/29/12
***CP mentioned***
We've been working on baby #1 since July 2013 using Open ID donor sperm. 8 IUI attempts with 5 actual IUIs and one chemical pregnancy. We have one fresh IVF cycle under our belts as well as a FET. I have endometriosis and a uterine septum that was corrected via surgery in November 2013.
11/14/14 - Second HSG shows that tubes are still clear and ute is looking good.
12/6/14 - Started BCPs in prep for IVF #2
12/22/14 - Saline u/s and endometrial scratch (All was clear and OUCH!)
1/2/15 - Began stimming for IVF #2
****All Welcome!****
We are Mommas to four fur babies - 3 dogs and 1 cat.
so sorry MrsPloehn . This is indeed such a friggin hard journey & to be honest I am really really tired of being told to be positive, its just too hard when the BFN hits.
I found out yesterday that DH's sperm should be frozen because dialysis can affect sperm count so we should keep some aside for the IVF scheduled for July, my therapy = 2 Chocolate Panna Cottas from my favorite Italian restaurant. You have to do whatever you need to take care of yourself and cope! Hang in there & take care of yourselves...
DH : 36, has Chronic Kidney Disease, on dialysis & is waiting on the transplant list (average wait for B+ is 5 years)
Me: 36, Hypothyroidism, PCOS, BMI 32, need to be done with "child bearing" ASAP so that I can be a Kidney donor (was fun realizing we didn't as much time as we thought :-/ )
We're TTC#1
IUI #1 : 5mcg Letrozole (CD 3-7) + Ovidrel Trigger + Had the one follicle = BFN (March 2014)
IUI #2 : 5mcg Letrozole (CD 3-7) + 150 iu Bravelle on CD9 (after much begging!) + Had the one follicle = BFN (April 2014)
7th May 2014 - changed REs, this one seems to care (we think....)
IUI #3 : 7mcg Letrozole (CD 3- 7) + 75 iu Bravelle (CD 8-12) + CD12 Scan 5/16 + Had 3 follicles (2 under 15mm) = BFN(May 2014)
IUI #4 : 7mcg Letrozole (CD 3- 7) + 75 iu Bravelle (CD 8-12) + CD12 Scan 5/16 + Had 1 follicle + DH gave best sample so far = BFN(June 2014)
IVF#1 - ER Only Cycle Sept-Oct 2014, 17 eggs Retrieved, 14 mature, 10 fertilized, 6 made it to Blast & post PGS 5 were not viable due to chromosomal abnormalities
Not sure where we go from here...
We're parents to two very adorable, bratty, affectionate & goofy Bernese Mountain Dog pups who would very much like a 2 legged baby brother or sister of their own!
Married 12/4/12
Began TTC 11/2012
Diagnosed as anovulatory 7/2013
Round #1 Clomid 50 mg 8/2013= BFN
Round#2 Clomid 50 mg 9/2013=BFN
First appointment with RE 9/27/2013
HSG showed left tube completely blocked, diagnosed with hypothyroid and began 50 mcg Synthroid, Vitamin D level low and began 2000 iu Vitamin D, Hubby's SA showed "super sperm" according to RE
Round#3 Clomid 50 mg + Ovidrel trigger 10/2013= BFN
Round #4 Clomid 50 mg + Ovidrel trigger 11/2013=BFN
Round #5 Clomid 50 mg (no trigger, on vacation) 12/2012= BFN
Round #1 Femara 2.5 mg, no trigger, IUI cancelled due to early ovulation 1/2014= BFN
1/25/2014= BENCHED for the first time (two leftover follies on the right)
2/7/14 Diagnosed with MTHFR/Benched
4/2014 Round #2 Femara 5mg, IUI #1=BFN
4/28/14 positive opk with no treatment while on break, confirmed with ultrasound= BFN
5/16/14 5mg Femara + trigger + TI= BFN
6/2014 5mg Femara + trigger + TI= BFN
Awaiting IVF consultation appointment on 7/29/2014
8/8/14 Began BCP's to prep for IVF
9/16/14 Began Lupron injections
9/25/14 Began stimming for IVF #1 with Menopur and Bravelle
10/8/14 10 eggs retrieved
10/13/14 2 embryos transferred
10/21/14 BFP!!!
11/24/14 confirmed that baby stopped growing at 6 weeks, d&c scheduled
I realize how messed up that sounds, but I just can't take the disappointment. I almost never thing it's going to be positive anymore anyway. I'm not even ovulating.
PCOS | Anovulatory | Metformin + Letrozole
I told DH to pick up a Cherry Dilly bar on his way home. He walked in the door with flowers and a whole box. Love him.
Thank you all so much for your posts! I am sending internet hugs and positive feelings to everyone today!
Married January 12, 2013
TTC since July 2013
Fertility Treatments January 2014 - June 2015
Took a break to prepare for IVF
Surprise BFP - September 2015 - MMC at 6 weeks, 5 days
Another surprise BFP - November 2015 - EDD: July 8th!
*hugs*
Trying to have baby #1 since April 2013
DH SA March,May 2014 - Low motility and shape issues. On vitamins per RE to help
Me testing April 3, 2014 - FSH and LH good, HSG showed blocked right tube
April 29, 2014 - First RE appt., right tube needs to be removed and possibly left also if
it's bad too. RE suggests going straight to IVF
June 4, 2014 - LAP/HSC and unexpected endo. removed but tubes got to stay!
June 13, 2014 - Post-Op appointment. We decide where to go next since main issue
is MFI influenced. Trying naturally until decision... Repeat SA in September. Aiming for IUI #1 November 2014.
TTC since March 2012
DX: MFI (4% motility)
Cycle 13: Natural cycle w/ HSG test = BFP
Identical twins!
Lost my angel boys at 10.5 weeks
Cycle 14-16: Natural Cycles = BFN
Cycle 17: Follistim + Trigger + IUI = BFN
Cycle 18: Natural Cycle = BFN
Cycle 19: Follistim + Trigger +IUI#2
Polyp found: SIS 11/11 - hysteroscopy 11/14
Cycle 20: Follistim + IUI#2 = BFFN
Cycle 21: Follistim (adj. dosage) + IUI#3 TI = BFN
IUI cancelled due to weather
Cycle 22: Follistim + IUI#3.1 = BFN
Cycle 23: treatment break, IVF consult
Cycle 24 - 26: natural cycle w/ acupuncture + Chinese herbs = BFN
Cycle 27: Follistim + IUI#4 = BFFN
Natural Cycles until IVF
Cycle 30: IVF#1 - Starting with Menopur + Follistim + Ganirelix
17 retrieved, 12 fertilized, 5dt w/ 2 blasts, 5 frosties
Betas: #1-156(9dp5dt), #2-1200(13dp5) #3-6112(17dp5)
Ultrasound #1 10/6: 1 bean!
TEAM BLUE!
My Chart
~~ALL WELCOME~~
Me: Ovulate on my own (but poorly) DH: Low count and poor motility
Oct 2013 Uterine polyp removed
Feb 2014 First round Ferama, trigger and IUI...BFN
March 2014 Second round Ferama, trigger and iui
Waiting....
2008: HSG (normal), couple rounds of clomid through gyno
2008 - 2010: dragging my feet out of fear and procrastination
October 2010: first consultation with RE, dx PCOS and fibroids (DH slightly low count/motility)
Oct. 2010 - Dec. 2012: In DENIAL! avoided the issue because I was scared of surgery
January 2013: returned to RE, fibroids grew significantly
February 2013: second HSG, fibroids pushed on tubes which blocked them somewhat
March 2013: MRI to determine what type of surgery may be necessary
July 29, 2013: fibroids (5) removed via robotic laparascopy
August 2013 - Nov 2013 : benched due to recent surgery
IUI #3, Feb. 25, 2014 BFN
IUI #4 canceled due to lack of response to letrozole
IUI #4.1 April 28, 2014, BFN
May 16, 2014: wtf consult, start prepping for IVF in June and add injects for one last IUI in the meantime
IUI #5 started letrozole and bravelle but canceled after HSG led to new diagnosis
May 21, 2014: third HSG, tubes blocked, one at the beginning, one hydrosalpinx??
IVF #1 August 8, 2014 - 3dt of 2 embryos, BFN
September 17, 2014 - 4th HSG, the right tube is very patent (open!!) dye went straight through this time. Weird!
October 2, 2014 - started metformin treatment
November 14, 2014 - blood work, brought A1C down from 5.8 to 5.5
November 26, 2014 - RE finally back from vaca and reviewed my chart, no more IVFs for rest of calendar year
December 1, 2014 - Right after Thanksgiving, I called a new clinic and got in right away! Plan for IVF
December 17, 2014 - ER! 29 retrieved (!!), 16 mature, all 16 fertilized (ICSI)
IVF #2 December 20, 2014 - 3dt of 3 embryos, BFN
We are done with treatment unsuccessfully.