Help...

csmily51 · May 2014

I am up for the 8th consecutive night with DD.

She only sleeps maybe 5-6 hrs all day (usually afternoon) and nurses. I try yo nurse her when she wants, but lately its been so erratic and sometimes she falls asleep, or will nurse for 30 min on one side and then want the other.

But at night...she will not sleep. I'll nurse her, she'll fall asleep while nursing. I wait 15 min or so and try to out her down so I can sleep. We've tried the crib, the pack n play, the bouncy seat, I bought a rnp yesterday. I even nursed her on my side, so she could sleep in the bed, held her in bed (neither or which you should do I know but I'm desperate!).

We've tried baths, we do our daily routine, a d she seems to have synced with us, but will not calm at night. I keep the lights bright during the day and room dark at night and quite, nothing makes a sifference..

Does anyone have any advice , tips or tricks? I'm desperate and can't stop crying...I yelled at a 1 month old, and am totally heartbroken I can't soothe her...
Any help/ advice would be appreciated.

MrsMeatball41 · May 2014

So not reccomended but some nights she sleeps in. The crook of my arm so she still feels held. Has she been checked for colic or reflux both can cause this and only sleep when held up. Also she could be comfort nursing - meaning if she has reflux drinking milk soothes her throat

BiggerinRealLife · May 2014

First off, I'm sorry. This is hard, and sleep deprevation makes it hellish. I don't have any advice because you sound like you're doing everything you can. But I can say that from what I've read this is normal. I'd talk to your ped and see if they can offer any help or advice, but right around one month your baby is going trough their first big developmental leap, and it can be a really hard transition for them. Plus, newborns cry for no apparent reason and can be inconsolable. It's part of the "fourth trimester" and youcan read more about it here.

https://www.purplecrying.info

In the meantime, you're not alone. You will get through this. It won't be forever, and it will get better. Hugs, Mama.

littlesocks · May 2014

I'm sorry you're going through this. Are you swaddling her? That may help make her feel hugged/more secure when she's not in your arms.
How about white noise? We keep a large fan going at night but other moms swear by the sleep sheep.

LaNorte · May 2014

It sounds like you are doing everything you can and are being very patient... what a good mom! I agree with pp about swaddling, except since I really suck at swaddling I use the swaddle sack instead.

NatalieBier · May 2014

Have you tried the miracle blanket yet? I uses it with my other two and will for this one too once she gains a few more lbs(she is too small for it right now). It is awesome.

heids4787 · May 2014

My LO has been like this, too, so I feel your pain! I've resorted many nights to bed sharing, having her sleep in the crook of my arm, and having her sleep on my chest with the sheets pulled down to a safer position (I, too, am nervous about these arrangements since they aren't aligned with SIDS prevention standards).

In her bassinet, I've had some luck doing the following: (on mobile, so sry about the formatting)

1) roll towels and place UNDER the head of the mattress to raise into an inclined surface (LO doesn't like lying flat),

2) roll another towel into a U shape at the foot of the bassinet and slip this between the mattress and sheet cover (this makes her feel hugged, but make sure it only extends to her arm pits/not near her face). Got this trick from an A14er! ;-)

3) having her sleep with a pacifier (MAM) while swaddled, listening to white noise with only limited nightlight illumination are our standards, too.

I've also been interested in buying a heating pad for the crib/bassinet to warm the sheet before she sleeps (removing before she's put down).

If she's like my LO, the challenge is moving her from the feeding position to sleeping. That's when I usually just burp her until she's limp/drowsy, lean back with her on my chest while propped with pillows, and then gradually place her next to my side for bed sharing. Sorry for this epic post, but I hope you can get some sleep soon!! Like pp have said, "this, too, shall pass." [-O<

cd92007 · May 2014

I'm so sorry you're going through this

my LO uses the Woombie Houdini every night.. It's the only swaddle that he likes and it's crazy how it calms him almost immediately. Then I put a heating pad down in his crib for the entire time I nurse him and then remove it and the spot is nice and warm. I also use a sound machine. That has worked well for me too. And when he's really fussy, I put him in a wrap on me (boba) and vacuum.

avidkeo · May 2014

Im so sorry you are experiencing this, you sound like an amazing mum!

We were having issues with LO sleeping at night, and while we are still working through things there are a few things that helped:

Google the 5 s's from the happiest baby on the block. They made a big difference for us. I use white noise instead of the shushing (just downloaded an app on my phone) and swaddling was a big one.

Yesterday we discovered that she was actually getting a lot of wind, so the last two days I will actually pull her off the breast every few minutes and burp her. It has made a HUGE difference. She used to do exactly what you describe, fall asleep at the breast, put her down and 10 minutes later she would be up again. Now generally when she goes down thats it for a few hrs. And she is feeding faster!

Finally I will only let her feed from the same breast for 2-4hrs. This ensures she gets more of the fulling hind milk. By changing from one breast to the other in less time tham this baby gets more foremilk which is thinner and can give them more gas. Its hard because my other breast does get rather full by the time its that ones turn, but it seems to help. Also feeds dont take as long, used to take over an hr, am getting down to about 30mins now.

What ever you do, good luck, and we are always here to help or just listen.

Avion22 · May 2014

Just out of curiosity, what happens when you put her down and she wakes up? Does she lay there with her eyes open, or does she start crying?

We noticed that C just lays there with his eyes open. At first we would pick him up and try to cuddle him to sleep, but every time we put him back down his eyes would pop open. Eventually we realized that if we got him to take a paci, and left the room, he'd fall asleep on his own in a few minutes. It we stayed in the room, or tried to hold him, he'd just get overstimulated.

We felt horrible leaving him alone when he was still awake, but we do have the monitor. And honestly, it works for us. It's the "awake but drowsy" that people talk about.

Now, if you put her down and she shrieks, then I don't have any advice.

lokimau · May 2014

My LO will only sleep at night if she is being held. Been sleeping in the recliner for 3 weeks. Going to buy a bed rail for our bed and try the co-sleeping thing soon!!

HNRomance · May 2014

Our LO did this for the first 2 weeks solid and I woke him to feed in the day, kept room bright during day and dark at night (we got a super dim bulb for the lamp so that I can see to feed him) and we swaddle. Biggest things seemed to be waking to feed in the day and the temp of the room. He sleeps better/deeper when the room is about 67-68 degrees and I can swaddle him in a light polar fleece baby blanket with a long-sleeve onesie on. He was almost impossible to wake up during the day sometimes but I was very persistent. Basically I had to strip him down and use a cold damp washcloth to wake him up. As his stomach got bigger and he got used to being kept up during the day he started sleeping longer at night. We get a 4-5hr stretch at night now! I also had to learn the difference between his fussy noise and real "I need something" cries. When he's fussy, I can let him go for a bit in his crib and he falls asleep on his own after a bit. Good luck! It is exhausting for sure.

csmily51 · May 2014

I have been trying to do every other breast but she's been cluster feeding the past two days, mainly in the evening. We hen I go to move her from feed to sleep, she goes bizirk like she's still hungry. Idk I'm at the edge if my sanity.

csmily51 · May 2014

PS sorry I'm just responding...been a long day.

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