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anxiety sucks

classicstar28classicstar28 member
in Pregnant after a Loss
Ok. I have tried and tried to stop myself from having anxiety, but I'm failing. I feel ridiculous for feeling this way. Every time I pass another week or have a good appointment I think maybe I can finally relax and enjoy this adventure. But then something else come up and I freak out.

This week I started getting nervous about either having an incompetent cervix or having preterm labor. I've seen so much about these things and I'm terrified of them. Every bit of discomfort I have scares me. Every twinge. I keep wondering if everything is normal despite everyone telling me it is.

I have mentioned my anxiety to my OB and she gave me a bunch of strategies to try, but they dont work for long. I don't really want to take anything for it and I'm not sure it would really help with my fears.

Does anyone have any relaxation techniques that work well for anxiety? Or is anyone taking anxiety medication that is helping with these kinds of fears?
Me- 29, DH - 28
BFP #1 9/27/2013, EDD 6/10/2014, Mmc 11/01/2013, completed with misoprostol 11/8/2013
BFP #2 2/5/2014, EDD 10/15/2014, Lillian Verletta born 10/23/14
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Re: anxiety sucks

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    tezottertezotter member

    I myself suffer from horrible anxiety. I am happy to share what I am doing to help, not sure if it will work for you.

    1) I talk a lot with people who suffer from anxiety. Talking to people who truly understand is very comforting to me.

    2) Acupuncture. I love it. It is an hour where I just tune into the baby and take some deep breaths.

    3) A hot cup of decaf tea and my favorite music before bed.

    4) I have a picture of my ultrasound on my phone. Whenever I start spiraling down the negative thought highway, I look at it and smile.

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    carlsonbaby2014carlsonbaby2014 member
    I'm so sorry you're struggling with the anxiety ((((hugs)))).  I can only offer up my own experiences for what has worked for me and that's therapy.  I started out by seeing my therapist every week for about three weeks, then we switched to every other week.  Now, I go about once a month. I've found the sessions to be very helpful not only in validating my feelings surrounding my losses but also in techniques I can use to help me understand how to give myself the space I need to work through some of the feelings I have that are not the most comfortable feelings (guilt, anger, regret, jealousy, etc.).  I hope you're able to find a solution that works for you, love.
    Began trying for a baby January 2012
    BFP 4.25.2013  EDD 1.3.2014  MMC 6.3.2013  D&C 6.19.2013
    BFP 11.3.2013  CP 11.6.2013
    BFP 3.31.2014 EDD 12.10.2014 Baby boy Carlson born 12.19.2014 
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    megbmegmegbmeg member
    I don't have any great ideas, but I just wanted to say you're definitely not alone in feeling anxious. Even though it would be wonderful to be able to just really relax and enjoy yourself as much as you can, I think it is also totally ok and fair to admit that you might just feel scared sometimes. Even lots of times. Temporary relief is worth aiming for and I hope PP's suggestions help. At the same time, you're not doing anything wrong by feeling anxious, and I hope you can give yourself a break about it. This is a scary thing, isn't it? One thing that has helped me is to remind myself that just because I feel scared or scary possibilities occur to me, that doesn't mean that anything bad is actually happening. Sometimes that helps me separate a bit from my anxious feelings. Good luck! Hang in there!
    Baby GIRL born 12/11/14!!
    MC @ 8 wks 7/6/13 - ectopic @ 6 wks 12/28/13

     In loving memory of sweet baby HP, and all our angel babies. Forever in our hearts.image 
     
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    jess123456jess123456 member
    edited May 2014
    I am so sorry that you are experiencing this but it can be a normal part of being PGAL. If you feel like it's getting very serious please contact your doctor.


    Some things that help for me:

    1) Therapy - I have found an amazing therapist who specializes in fertility and loss. Your OB might have a recommendation for you.

    2) Meditation - I found a local group but there are tons are stuff online.

    3) Yoga and light exercise

    4) Writing - When I am feeling really anxious I write down my thoughts and I find that it helps a lot.

    5) Support network (real life friends or online forums like there where people relate or support groups in person

    6) My doppler - I can't see your signature so I am not sure how far along you are but my doppler helps a ton. I know it's not for everyone though and can cause more anxiety if you can't find it but it can be hard to find sometimes.

    I haven't tried acupuncture but hear it's amazing and if you are open to trying it maybe that could help too. I hope this helps. Being PGAL is very hard. Remember that the odds are in your favor of bringing home a healthy baby. The experiences that you have learned about are very traumatic but remember that they are also incredibly rare. Thinking of you.
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    becky7683becky7683 member
    Anxiety is hard.  Talking to others that have anxiety definitely helps though.  For me, therapy was the answer.  I'm not currently going anymore ... but I use the strategies she gave me all the time.  I still have the anxiety at 37 weeks, but I try not to let it consume me.  It does every now and then, but not as bad as it did before.   My therapist taught me to recognize the anxiety, and then go do something else.  Hugs to you! 
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