Monday Morning Vents

cecilyandgautam · May 2014

Happy Cinco de Mayo! Vent away

jennyelf · May 2014

Conversation with coworker today:

"Your kiddo is turning 2 years old. How do you feel about that?"
"It what it is, and that's pretty ok. I can't stop the passage of time. He's going to get older."
"Oh my wife was really upset when our kid turned 6 months old. She just really loves being a mom and gets sad as kid gets more independent."
"Oh, I've never really been that way."
"But you separated from him really early." (I took 8 weeks maternity leave.)

....
So I'm less attached to my kid because I'm not a SAHM?
I'm not really sure how to interpret this conversation, but I don't think I love the implication.
Co-worker probably doesn't realize how he sounds, but this is the same coworker who has previously stated stuff like, "Oh, my wife could never leave our child in daycare."

ss265 · May 2014

I read about the Oil Cleaning Method last Friday on here and decided to try it. Well I now have a terrible rash all over my face.

I don't know if it's due to the OCM or due to an allergic reaction to something (I have rashes on a smaller scale elsewhere on me). I am just trying to drink tons of water and go back to my normal skin care routine and hope that my skin calms down over the next few days.

rubber_chicken · May 2014

My sister's wedding was this weekend. It was really lovely and everyone had a great time.

Except me. I spent the entire reception either babysitting my daughter, babysitting my drunk mother, or babysitting my drunk husband (who was supposed to be babysitting our kid). I didn't get to dance or catch up with anyone.

I keep daydreaming about running away to another coast, far far away from everyone.

cecilyandgautam · May 2014

There's some lady who has reason to stop by our office once or twice a day. I have no idea who she is or what she does, she works with other people in the office, not me, but every time she walks by has some rude comment to offer about my pregnancy and the fact that I'm at work while pregnant (the horrors!) and I'm starting to feel pretty harassed by it - she clearly thinks I shouldn't be here. I'm debating whether my response to her next pop by should be "Wow, that sounds an awful lot like harassment. Maybe you should be more careful." or "I hope you don't talk like that to everyone. Did you have something work related to discuss?" or if I should just go with something more vague like "What was your name again? How's your last name spelled? Hm, well thanks, that helps" - not sure she'd get what I'm hinting at though.

ss265 · May 2014

cecilyandgautam said:

There's some lady who has reason to stop by our office once or twice a day. I have no idea who she is or what she does, she works with other people in the office, not me, but every time she walks by has some rude comment to offer about my pregnancy and the fact that I'm at work while pregnant (the horrors!) and I'm starting to feel pretty harassed by it - she clearly thinks I shouldn't be here. I'm debating whether my response to her next pop by should be "Wow, that sounds an awful lot like harassment. Maybe you should be more careful." or "I hope you don't talk like that to everyone. Did you have something work related to discuss?" or if I should just go with something more vague like "What was your name again? How's your last name spelled? Hm, well thanks, that helps" - not sure she'd get what I'm hinting at though.

@cecilyandgautum, what does she say? I'm curious now.

cecilyandgautam · May 2014

beaubecca said:

ss265 said:

cecilyandgautam said:

There's some lady who has reason to stop by our office once or twice a day. I have no idea who she is or what she does, she works with other people in the office, not me, but every time she walks by has some rude comment to offer about my pregnancy and the fact that I'm at work while pregnant (the horrors!) and I'm starting to feel pretty harassed by it - she clearly thinks I shouldn't be here. I'm debating whether my response to her next pop by should be "Wow, that sounds an awful lot like harassment. Maybe you should be more careful." or "I hope you don't talk like that to everyone. Did you have something work related to discuss?" or if I should just go with something more vague like "What was your name again? How's your last name spelled? Hm, well thanks, that helps" - not sure she'd get what I'm hinting at though.

@cecilyandgautum, what does she say? I'm curious now.

I am curious too! I've noticed there are some people who try to make small talk by being like this - like they think it is a bonding opportunity to say you shouldn't be working while pregnant or whatever. Like you will give them a grateful smile or something. But if you are feeling boarderline harassed I can't help but wonder what she could possibly be saying to you!

It's really a combination of the look she gives (disgusted), the tone, and the complete randomness. She doesn't say hi, has never introduced herself, and just does some drive by dig. The latest was *dirty look over from head to toe* then "so you're just going to deliver the baby here?" - it was so random, everyone I was standing with looked horrified. Every time she sees me, she gives the same look, says something along the lines of "are you sure you should be here?", lingers for a few more disapproving moments, and then moves along.

I get what you're saying - plenty of people offer random commentary and the vast majority mean well. When I was expecting my first, the guards in my building also made daily jokes about how I should be careful not to go into labor on their watch, they don't want to have to catch the baby, etc etc etc - it was just an entirely different tone though. They were being friendly and even though I got tired of it, I didn't feel harassed by it. This lady is just hostile - it's not an inappropriate but well meaning joke. She intends to make me feel out of place so I feel I should say something to let her know her behavior is what's out of place.

88sharonlee · May 2014

K3am said:
I am sick. STILL. I've had a fever anywhere from 99-103 since Friday. On Friday, I called the advice line since I was coughing so much I couldn't breath. They say if you have a fever for 3 days, call back. So I called back Sunday and get the advice that if I have a fever for 5 days then call back.. what the hecK?

I had a bad experience with the stupid nurse advise line recently and it makes me mad thinking about it. I woke up. With extreme stomach pains- like I thought I was in labor! (I'm not preggo)

After debating to go to the hospital or not I thought if give the hotline a try first.

Long story short after putting in all my info - which isn't fun when your in pain, and answering a few long minutes of yes no questions the advise was just " if I'm still in pain in another hour or so I should go to the ER or urgent care"

That's it! Gee thanks!

ss265 · May 2014

K3am said:

ss265 said:

I read about the Oil Cleaning Method last Friday on here and decided to try it. Well I now have a terrible rash all over my face. I don't know if it's due to the OCM or due to an allergic reaction to something (I have rashes on a smaller scale elsewhere on me). I am just trying to drink tons of water and go back to my normal skin care routine and hope that my skin calms down over the next few days.

Oh no! I think I'm the one of the ones who recommended OCM! I'm so sorry to hear this!!

@K3am, so not your fault! I should have done more research before diving into it. I still don't know if this is the "purge" you are supposed to go through but I am thinking that it could be an allergic reaction to one of the oils. Or it could be something to do with me changing things up while pregnant. Regardless I am sure that it will be fine in a few days. The funny thing is before I started the OCM, I had gotten into the habit of sleeping with my makeup on and my skin looked better than it does now.

ss265 · May 2014

cecilyandgautam said:

Snipped.

It's really a combination of the look she gives (disgusted), the tone, and the complete randomness. She doesn't say hi, has never introduced herself, and just does some drive by dig. The latest was *dirty look over from head to toe* then "so you're just going to deliver the baby here?" - it was so random, everyone I was standing with looked horrified. Every time she sees me, she gives the same look, says something along the lines of "are you sure you should be here?", lingers for a few more disapproving moments, and then moves along.

I get what you're saying - plenty of people offer random commentary and the vast majority mean well. When I was expecting my first, the guards in my building also made daily jokes about how I should be careful not to go into labor on their watch, they don't want to have to catch the baby, etc etc etc - it was just an entirely different tone though. They were being friendly and even though I got tired of it, I didn't feel harassed by it. This lady is just hostile - it's not an inappropriate but well meaning joke. She intends to make me feel out of place so I feel I should say something to let her know her behavior is what's out of place.

That is really weird! I would ask her privately if she has any issues with you being pregnant and working. Is there anyone else in the office who is pregnant? How has she reacted to them?

cecilyandgautam · May 2014

ss265 said:

cecilyandgautam said:

Snipped.

It's really a combination of the look she gives (disgusted), the tone, and the complete randomness. She doesn't say hi, has never introduced herself, and just does some drive by dig. The latest was *dirty look over from head to toe* then "so you're just going to deliver the baby here?" - it was so random, everyone I was standing with looked horrified. Every time she sees me, she gives the same look, says something along the lines of "are you sure you should be here?", lingers for a few more disapproving moments, and then moves along.

I get what you're saying - plenty of people offer random commentary and the vast majority mean well. When I was expecting my first, the guards in my building also made daily jokes about how I should be careful not to go into labor on their watch, they don't want to have to catch the baby, etc etc etc - it was just an entirely different tone though. They were being friendly and even though I got tired of it, I didn't feel harassed by it. This lady is just hostile - it's not an inappropriate but well meaning joke. She intends to make me feel out of place so I feel I should say something to let her know her behavior is what's out of place.

That is really weird! I would ask her privately if she has any issues with you being pregnant and working. Is there anyone else in the office who is pregnant? How has she reacted to them?

I could engage and try to reason with her but the weirdest thing is that I don't know her at all. She's never introduced herself. We don't work together. I don't know who she is. She's just randomly harassing me out of nowhere. And yes, there are tons of pregnant women in our organization! Several of whom are much further along than I am, so if this lady thinks pregnant women should just stay home, I'm not the most offending party within sight. I don't know if she's treating others the same or not. So, I don't really have a foundation from which to try to reason with her. I think I should just nip it in the bud and let that be the end of the conversation - a conversation that never formally began anyway, since she doesn't say hi or introduce herself.

ss265 · May 2014

cecilyandgautam said:

ss265 said:

cecilyandgautam said:

Snipped.

It's really a combination of the look she gives (disgusted), the tone, and the complete randomness. She doesn't say hi, has never introduced herself, and just does some drive by dig. The latest was *dirty look over from head to toe* then "so you're just going to deliver the baby here?" - it was so random, everyone I was standing with looked horrified. Every time she sees me, she gives the same look, says something along the lines of "are you sure you should be here?", lingers for a few more disapproving moments, and then moves along.

I get what you're saying - plenty of people offer random commentary and the vast majority mean well. When I was expecting my first, the guards in my building also made daily jokes about how I should be careful not to go into labor on their watch, they don't want to have to catch the baby, etc etc etc - it was just an entirely different tone though. They were being friendly and even though I got tired of it, I didn't feel harassed by it. This lady is just hostile - it's not an inappropriate but well meaning joke. She intends to make me feel out of place so I feel I should say something to let her know her behavior is what's out of place.

That is really weird! I would ask her privately if she has any issues with you being pregnant and working. Is there anyone else in the office who is pregnant? How has she reacted to them?

I could engage and try to reason with her but the weirdest thing is that I don't know her at all. She's never introduced herself. We don't work together. I don't know who she is. She's just randomly harassing me out of nowhere. And yes, there are tons of pregnant women in our organization! Several of whom are much further along than I am, so if this lady thinks pregnant women should just stay home, I'm not the most offending party within sight. I don't know if she's treating others the same or not. So, I don't really have a foundation from which to try to reason with her. I think I should just nip it in the bud and let that be the end of the conversation - a conversation that never formally began anyway, since she doesn't say hi or introduce herself.

@cecilyandgautum, that is just so bizarre! I would just ignore her.

ss265 · May 2014

K3am said:

ss265 said:
@K3am, so not your fault! I should have done more research before diving into it. I still don't know if this is the "purge" you are supposed to go through but I am thinking that it could be an allergic reaction to one of the oils. Or it could be something to do with me changing things up while pregnant. Regardless I am sure that it will be fine in a few days. The funny thing is before I started the OCM, I had gotten into the habit of sleeping with my makeup on and my skin looked better than it does now.

It could always be just the type of oil you used also, but if you've got a routine that works for your skin and you know OCM gave you a reaction, I'd probably be hesitant to try again! I so miss my pregnancy skin.. I stopped wearing makeup to work and no one noticed (literally... a client dropped off some samples of makeup remover towels, and I used one at work and someone was shocked that I didn't leave behind a tan towel, so I know it wasn't just pity).. If I could spend my whole life pregnant (with the same kind of pregnancy as I had - I know they're not all the same), and not have to have a whole litter full of babies, I would totally do it.

@K3am, I really don't know what caused it. I used almond oil so it could be allergy driven but I don't have any nut allergies. And the weird part is I have a rash on my clavicle and on the backs of my hands too which didn't touch the oil. I think the OCM just made my skin super sensitive and I was out in the sun on Sunday (the reaction popped up right afterwards) so I just had a bad reaction to the sun. Pregnancy hormones probably don't help either. I have an appointment with a dermatologist on Thursday so hopefully she can give me something to treat it with.

I'm jealous of your pregnancy skin.

Want a personalized experience?

Monday Morning Vents

Re: Monday Morning Vents

Choose Another Board

Search Boards