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February 2014 Moms
ntroud01
member
Feeling Helpless... (sorry long)
ntroud01
member
I am really struggling with this feeling of total helplessness and stress / anxiety in regards to LO. Back story- DS is breastfed and for the past 2 months he has been having bloody stools, abdominal pain and diarrhea off and on. We took him to Children's to get x-rayed at the onset of symptoms when he was 1 month old. Since nothing abnormal was apparent on his x-ray, the doctor determined that likely cause of his symptoms was a milk protein allergy. Que a total elimination of all dairy products from my diet. After no improvement I eliminated soy, eggs and nuts as well, and then gluten and shellfish. After that still didn't solve the issue, we were sent to a GI specialist who recommended we temporarily put DS a hypoallergenic formula. It seemed to improve, but a stool test still showed microscopic amounts of blood and several days later, visible blood was apparent once again.
Frustrated that nothing was working, I went on an extreme total elimination diet for 2 weeks eating nothing but turkey, lamb, rice, potatoes, squash and pears. Again things seemed to get better, but after a week and a half the blood and diarrhea were back again. So, the pediatrician checked his iron levels on Tuesday and it turns out that DS is anemic from all the blood in his stools. So, we switched back to formula and went to see an allergist. They did skin allergy tests Thursday for 21 of the top allergens, which if you can imagine is absolute hell on a tiny infant. The tests were all negative, so we were sent to a different doctor to do blood testing where he was poked and prodded again. We are still waiting for the results of the blood test, and in the meantime DS has been put on Neocate, a super expensive formula that is only made up of amino acids, no protein to see if that helps then have his Iron levels and stool tested again. If it does help, he will need to stay on it (at a cost of around $600/ month bc insurance will not cover it).
The allergist however, said that it very likely the formula will not work and believes DS does not have a food allergy because of everything mentioned previously not working and told me to keep pumping because I may be able to go back to BFing. He also said that it could possibly be an immune abnormality where his T cells attack proteins or some sort of bowel disease in which case we will need to do a whole new round of more invasive testing with a GI doc to figure that out.
It is just sooo hard not knowing what is causing this and I am really worried for DS and hate feeling like there is nothing I can do to make it better. Additionally, it has caused a lot problems between DH and I the past 2 months because he was convinced it was something I kept eating (even though I watched everything extremely carefully) or doing like not washing bottles good enough or sterilizing the plates I ate off and that by continuing to try and breastfeed I was "torturing our baby and making him suffer" and that it was basically my fault and I was a bad mom for wanting to go back to BFing, even though the formula didn't work either! I just don't know what to do and feel scared for DS and alone in dealing with all this.
Anyways sorry, this was long I just needed to get it out. I don't know if anyone else has dealt with a similar situation and how it turned out, but T&P's would be appreciated. Here is a fun pic of LO if you made it through all that. At least he keeps me smiling!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Feeling Helpless... (sorry long)
BFP #1 5.26.08 DD born 1.4.09
BFP #2 3.11.12 m/c 3.26.12
BFP #3 10.7.12 m/c 10.27.12
BFP #4 2.24.13 ectopic MTX 3.13.13 Right tube removed 3.29.13
BFP #5 5.27.13 DS born 1.22.14
BFP #6 4.14.16
Mom to Lily and Colin!
My goodness, these last couple of months sound so stressful for you. I can't imagine. I'm so sorry you're dealing with all of this - and an unsupportive DH.
I really hope you get some answers soon so you and your LO can begin feeling better.
He's a huge cutie pie though!!
2. Giant TP to your husband- those things are NOT ok to say. You are a team. And it sounds like you're the opposite of a bad mom- you're trying everything under the sun to help your son.
3. You are an amazing mom and LO is lucky to have you.
Ditto what megash said- those rolls, though!
figure things out on his end simultaneously instead of waiting 2-3 weeks.
@msenginerd I really wish that would work. I have tried talking to DH about it but we end up fighting because he thinks he knows best and I need to just agree with him. I just don't think he's in a place right now where he can really listen. I feel he just wants to control the situation. He even gave me crap about wanting to take him back to the doc this week after BFing on the turkey rice diet wasn't working and said I was overreacting and just needed to do the "smart" thing and put him back on nutramigen again (even though he had blood on that too) his justification being that the last time DS must still have had my breastmilk still in his system making him sick, despite the doctor saying it would have cleared up with how long he was on it. I am glad I pushed to take him in anyway bc of the anemia and fact that it could be something else entirely.
@wildflower26 So your DD1 did have the allergies but it just took that long to clear? How much blood were you seeing and was it enough to cause anemia for your DD1 also and if so did it only drop to a point and level off? The reason my ped and allergist are not recommending that now is because of his dropping iron levels. They are worried about DS becoming anemic to the point of causing him other health issues due to the amount he is continuing to lose.
I wish there was anything I could say to help you cope with LOs issues. I know how hard it is to give up eating certain things to help with breast feeding. Try telling DH to do that! I do hope they figure it out ASAP so that you can go back to a normal routine and not worry about his health.
Sigh... Here's something to pick you up
And I'm so sorry that your dh is being an ass. Is he usually a know it all/ controlling ass or is he panicked and reacting really poorly?
I hope you and the specialists are able to find something that works for your LO. I just love his rolls!!
Good luck with the results; I hope they are benign in that there is nothing more serious going on.
♥ The Blog ♥
I told him he was smart enough to realize that he didn't know everything and that he should be smart enough to know he didn't want a wife who always agreed... And that disagreeing didn't mean I don't love and respect him.
This situation is more complicated of course. Have you told him straight out that he needs to stop taking it out on you and blaming you and that you want to be a team? I'm sorry he's handling this so poorly. He is really being an ass.